Some days...

Superman is not a very good best friend.

Just for the record, A) only Supergirl is having "bigger troubles" and B) Superman isn't going to help her or any other members of the Superman Family. He's going to The Fortress to use the "what if" machine (the same one he and Batman used to view the hypothetical Super Sons) to see what would have happened if Krypton had blown up before he was born. Because high priorities. [SPOILER ALERT: Infant Jor-El and infant Lara are launched to Earth, and adopted by separate Smallville families.]

Anyway, I had hoped that Jimmy would spend his story mocking Speedy ("Stop horsing around" "don't make me smack you" "Working with you is like a shot in the arm"). Alas, it was not to be...

From Superman Family #192 (1978)

Look, I've got some bad news for you Aquaman fans out there--the guy is completely unnecessary.

To wit: recurring Green Arrow villain The Wizard has escaped from prison. And he has a cunning plan how to avoid the Emerald Archer...

Yeah, like that's gonna stop Green Arrow for more than 30 seconds...

So how can Green Arrow fight crime underwater?

With his new weapons, Green Arrow can go completely Thunderball!!


But what about when our hero needs to control sea life? Huh? Huh??


Fact: Trick arrows are like aquatic telepathy, but cooler!!

But what about when The Wizard gets extra clever, like...

...a fake iceberg to hijack ships?!?!

Oliver has an answer for that...

Really?

Yes, really!!

"Green Arrow's rain of salt arrows!"just might be the phrase of the week...

The Wizard managed to escape, and he has one last ploy up his sleeve:

A fire-breathing sea-beast awakened by atomic testing?!? Holy crap, it's Godzilla!!

But Oliver's not licked yet...


Sure, I guess a flare arrow would "attract thousands of fish to the scene"? Maybe?

But wait--what the hell is that thing Ollie thought?!?!?

"All my telepathic power"?? Oliver Queen has telepathic power?!? Green Arrow can talk to fishes?!?!?!

Hells, yes:


Holy crap, Ollie can control sea life!!!

And as to the criminals...

Bloggers and criminals agree: "Aquaman himself couldn't have done better than Green Arrow did underwater!"

So, I believed this is CASE CLOSED. Aquaman is unnecessary and redundant!! Oliver Queen can talk to fishes, even without any of that half-Atlantean, King Of The Seas pretentious mumbo-jumbo!! He can stop underwater crime!! And Speedy makes a fine Aqualad!!!

Maybe Arthur can get a job at Seaworld or something...

From World's Finest #145 (1964)