Guess what time it is, kiddies?

Now, I'm compelled to admit that I can't even draw a stick figure adequately, so all of the "here's how to draw" features in the universe wouldn't help me .

Still, this was in Treasure Chest Of Fun And Fact, a magazine aimed directly at school kids. So hopefully some potential artists found it helpful.

Frank Borth was the real deal. He created Spider Widow, drew lots of Phantom Lady, and did art for a lot of companies during the Golden Age.

After the war, he did an awful lot of work for Treasure Chest, and worked for over a decade on the syndicated newspaper strip There Oughta Be A Law. He also did some work for Cracked.

So Borth certainly had some street cred when teaching drawing.




Let's see...gotta keep proportion, head size is important, overmuscled bodies look like "sacks of lumpy wet cats"...I think we know who never read any of Borth's tips!


Ye gods.

From Treasure Chest Of Fun And Fact Vol 18 #14 (1963)

Lest we ever forget the tragedies of the past...

AIEEEEEEE MY EYES!!!!!!!!

Sorry about that...

I apologize for doing this...



...but we can never let ourselves forget the 90s.

Ye. Gods.

Maybe it's something about being underwater.

I've spent the better part of a year searching for a team lamer than the short-lived and lamentable Deep Six.

Ask, and the Quarter Bin giveth, as the cover of New Mutants Annual #5 (1989) promises us:

S.U.R.F.??? Who dat??

Gaze upon them in full Liefeldian pin-up glory:

Yes, I know the cover had periods in the S.U.R.F., whereas the pin-up is just plain SURF. They're never referred to by either name in the story, so, I guess you get to chose for yourself. Hurray!

And yes, the costume Liefeld drew for Namorita is amazingly bad.

Anyway, this is during Atlantis Attacks, and it turns out that SURF is  group of Atlantean mutants...


Sharkskin has--wait for it--really tough skin, Eel can become flat and stretch, and Undertow can control water.

These guys made one more appearance--the Avengers West Coast Annual #5 the following year--and then they vanished into the murky depths of forgotitude.

So--they made one more appearance than Deep Six...but most of the Deep Sixers have at least appeared again, individually. So I have to declare that SURF (or S.U.R.F.) is indeed lamer than Deep Six.

So maybe it is something about being an underwater team.

Then again, it could be worse--they could have had a really stupid name like The Others...

Because the Quarter Bin compels us to remember the past, here are some pin-ups from the back of New Mutants Annual #6 (1990):

AAAIIIEEEEEEE!!!!

And...


Double AAAIIIIEEEEEEEE!!!!

It's like watching the 1990s being born right before your eyes...

This house ad appeared in all the DC's this week:

I mean...wait, really, because...uhh...of all the things to hard sell, they...ummmm...1990s...Look, I er...well, you know...

Hrmmmmm.