Because Batman and Robin are not very good at their jobs, the Joker has captured them...so it's time for a overly-complicated death trap!!



Wait...not just starving vampire bats--but starving vampire bats with poisoned teeth and claws!! 

Geez, Joker, why not infect them with the Clench, too, and give them switchblades, and...

It makes me incredibly sad that neither Joker nor the Dynamic Duo comment even once on the irony of Batman about to be killed by bats...

Oh, don;t worry--they escape just fine.





We never find out what happened to the bats. The probably escaped and killed dozens while Batman was off playing robbery games with Joker...

From World's Finest Comics #19 (1945)

See, the Gotham City heroes, getting tired of being beaten up by Batman and company, have gone to find greener pastures to exploit--Riverdale!!

Siren's lovely voice has enabled the blackguards to control the adults, but the town's teenagers are immune to her charms.

So, the Joker has decided to try and brainwash the kid most likely (in his view) to join in his hijnks--Jughead!

But our dear Mr. Jones is...unimpressed.


Dude, Jughead's not a joiner...

From Archie Meets batman '66 #4 (2018)

I miss the days when the Joker was just a colorful guy who committed brash crimes, rather than a genocidal maniac who cared about nothing except using a body count to annoy Batman.

Like, for instance, the time he based a whole series of crimes on America's Top 40--and he was so busy getting rich that he didn't even kill anyone!!

We start with the Joker & gang idly listing to the radio...


And so, a new themed crime wave is launched!

So how do you commit a crime based on Old Man River?


Joker made sure that his plan got to Batman...


That's an actual song, by the way...they all are!!


It goes on and on...


Bad guess, Batman!

Well, Batman finally shows up at this crime, but the Joker gets away--and captures Robin!! And he doesn't even kill the Boy Wonder with a crowbar or anything!

Now, if you thought the Joker was coming up with crimes on the spot, planning instantly once he heard what the day's most requested song was--WRONG!!

He's the Joker...of course he cheated!

Wait--people request songs...by mail? They had to send in letters? It's 1947--did Gotham not have telephones yet? Did folks really have time to write letters to their local radio stations requesting songs?? What the heck?

Still, it makes it easy for Batman to track down the Joker's lair...




Unfortunately, Batman hadn't been elevated to godhood yet by writers desperate to top each other, so of course he gets captured, while the Joker leaves for one more crime:


Gotham City has an "Electric Company Hall Of Wonders!" How could anyone think this city could be a hellhole?

Anyway, batman finally beats the Clown Prince Of Crime:

Ha ha ha!

If you were to ask me, Batman missed two major opportunities to wrap this case up earlier.

First of all, the radio station surely didn't decide at the last moment what the most requested song of the day was. And of course they would have cooperated with Batman and the police, letting them know ahead of time what the #1 song was, So Batman could crack the clue early and beat the Joker there.

Secondly--and this is the way I would have written the story--Batman himself (together with Robin and Alfred, of course) should have written hundreds of letters of his own, so his song would be #1 instead of the Joker's!! And to save face with his gang and the public, Joker wouldn't be able to admit that--he'd have to pretend it was his choice, and concoct some crime to go with the song Batman picked. And of course, Batman would be there waiting for him.

That's why I'm not allowed to write comics. Even 1940s comics.

From Detective Comics #124 (1947)

You know, if he weren't already a kajillionaire, this would be a pretty clever way to "sell out":

Of course, these days a million dollars is a rounding error to Bruce Wayne. And given that the ever-increasing circle of those who already know Batman's secret identity probably numbers in the hundreds, you could almost certainly buy the information for considerably cheaper from, say, a disaffected Hush henchman.

But why would Batman "sell out" in the first place?

See, exposure to "epsilon rays" caused Joker and Batman's minds to switch bodies, because science.

So, wait. Why didn't Joker just take off the mask and look in the mirror, for his own satisfaction, before promising to sell the information? Why wait, and then have the epsilon rays wear off, and get nothing from the whole magillah?

Because comics.

From Batman #85 (1954), as reprinted in Batman #182 (1966)

Scarface has gotten wind that the loot from the Joker's last bug heist was never recovered. So he and his gang bust the Clown Prince Of Crime out of Arkham, with the intention of forcing him to give up the location of the dough.

And this is the first time that Joker and Scarface have met. I think it might go a little something like...this:









I just knew those two would get along...

Oh, don't worry about the Joker. He gets his revenge later.

From Detective Comics Annual #5 (1992)

Oh, Sam Kieth, you mad, mad genius, you...

Let us travel back to ye olden days in Europe...







See?!? That's so obviously the Joker, that--

Oh. Never mind.

Still, this brings to mind a question--is the Joker the last major character (recent creations excepted) to not actually have an origin, to have his creation myth shrouded and hidden from the readers?

Wolverine's origin wasn't revealed for decades, but Marvel got to it (eventually)--hell, they even made a movie out of it!

The Phantom Stranger's beginnings were deliberately kept cloudy--famously, there was an issue of Secret Origins in the 1980s that coyly posited 4 different possible origin stories for the Stranger, without committing to any of them being the actual "truth".

Of course, once the nu52 came along, literal-minded DC ended all that: "He's Judas--deal with it!"

Yet despite insisting on ending the mystery of the one character whose mystique perhaps depended on mystery, DC has insisted on keeping the truth of the Joker's origin mum. He was Red Hood! He was a failed comedian! He was a vicious criminal! He's a super-genius whose spine is filled with mysterious fluid that can turn anyone into a Joker! He's immortal! He's a floor wax! He's a dessert topping!

Of course, we're now at the point where Geoff Johns has made it canon that there are 3 Jokers, without any explanation. (I picture Johns grinning foolishly at that little turd he left in DC's bowl as he walked away from writing comics, knowing that no one there would have the guramba to flush it away or do anything with it...)

Does it serve any purpose to keep the Joker's origin so shrouded? At best, it allows unrestrained writers to keep making The Clown Prince Of Crime more and more powerful, as he's escalated from a bank robber with a shtick to an insane nihilist to Maximus The Mad, trying to bring down all society and powerful enough to take out the whole Justice League (but not Batman--he's the bestest!).

That's one symbol of what's been going on at DC the past decade--we must completely define the Phantom Stranger, but we must keep the Joker free to grow more and more powerful and dangerous to better show off how cool Batman is.

So, since DC won't give us a Joker origin--for any of the three (!)--feel free to use the story above. Except for the "he died" part...

From The Beyond #8 (1952)