Please, please, please...

DON'T CARRY YOUR GUN IN YOUR MOUTH!!

(Yes, yes, I know, he's almost certainly not carrying his gun in his mouth. It's probably the gun from one of Rawhide Kid's opponents, knocked up into the air or some such. You tell Jack Kirby he drew it goofy!!)

From Rawhide Kid #31 (1962)

Because we all need to be reminded sometimes:



And so...




Sadly, it seems some things are forever.

From Forever People #3 (1971)

Continuing our attempt to generate Fantastic Four content for the two-month gap between Fantastic Four #2 & #3 by spotlighting Fantastic Four Annual #1 (1963).

We all remember the time Spider-Man tried to join the Fantastic Four, right?? Back in Amazing Spider-Man #1 (1963)? By Stan and Steve?? I went a little something like this...




So what does this have to do with the Fantastic Four annual mentioned above?

This:
Whether you believe the "countless requests" or not, Marvel gave us the expanded, director's cut version of that meeting--over twice as long!! Because back then, annuals were special and filled special things, not just forgettable fifth-week fillers.

This time, by Stan, Jack...and inked by Steve!!





More to come...

We here at Slay Monstrobot continue to try to fill the gap created by the we-can't-put-out-a-monthly-FF-comic-for-3-straight-months approach at Marvel. This week, we're focusing on Fantastic Four Annual #1 (1963)!!

Jack Kirby (justifiably) gets lots of credit for his Asgard, for his New Genesis, etc. But nobody ever talks about his Atlantis!

If you recall, over Namor's first several Silver Age appearances, there was no Atlantis. It had been wrecked by nuclear testing while he was living as a hobo, and the Atlanteans moved, and he couldn't find him, because the ocean is freaking huge.

But now he's found them--and it's the return of the king!

The next two were part of a double-page spread...


We are regaled with tales of the origins of Atlantis...

What a glorious city...

Great war vehicles, too...

More from this annual soon...

Look, Marvel crapped the bed here.

After depriving us of the Fantastic Four for 3 long years, they finally launched a new series.

And they can't even get 3 consecutive issues out on time. THREE!!

This week was supposed to see the release of Fantastic Four #3, but no, for unstated reasons, it has been delayed a month.

When you can't get 3 consecutive issues out on a monthly basis, well, you need some help. How can this happen?!?!?!

[Aside: When Jack Kirby went to DC in 1970, his contract called for him to do a minimum of 15 pages per week. Yes, that's writing and drawing. Now, apparently, 15 pages per month is too much for too many modern artists. Artists--you're no Jack Kirby--get over yourselves and draw faster! Editors--it isn't that hard to figure out--if you've got a slowpoke artist, waste less time drawing up with variant covers and put those people to work drawing your damn comics!

Of course, now it will turn out that the issue was delayed by illness or personal emergency. So, I'm an idiot. Just ignore me.]

So, I find myself forced to fill the dead FF space in our lives by upping the FF content around here. Today and throughout the week, I'll be focusing on content from the glorious Fantastic Four Annual #1 (1963)--one of the greatest comics ever published.

First up--let's answer some fan questions!!




This is at least the third time we've gotten a cutaway schematic of the Baxter Building, but this is the most detailed:

I ask again: is the "giant map room" a room for giant maps, or a giant room full of maps?

I also like that the photo analysis lab is apparently bigger than the biological research lab and the techincal research lab and machine shops COMBINED.

More to come...

If you've read enough Joe Simon and Jack Kirby romance comics--and by god, if you haven't, than get reading!!--you've no doubt noticed that they had an unusual introductory motif:

Not in every story. mind you. But in many, many of them...

In the splash panel, our heroine would describe her problem directly to the readers...

...ending in giving us the title of the story in big-assed font:

Let's look at some more...



(That's not as creepy as it seems...he was an adult trying to get some education to improve himself...)




No, your sacrifice was your fashion sense, apparently!


No, which of these was the worse problem...loving a woman-hater...

...or loving a mama's boy?

This one is like Kirby and Simon were spying on my love life:

Here's an interesting case...

While most romance stories have us assume that all problems are permanently solved with the last 4 panels of self-realization and revelation, in Toni Benson's case, Kirby and Simon decided that she and her beau weren't out of the woods yet, and published an actual sequel story!

This doesn't exactly fit the motif, but I couldn't resist...

From Young Romance: The Best Of Simon & Kirby's Romance Comics (2012)

There was one very special perk to being an early Fantastic Four villain:




You got the greatest damn chairs ever!!

Almost makes me want to take up evil...

From Fantastic Four #1 (1961) and #5-7 (1962)