It's open mic night!!

So pull up a chair, have a mochachino, and listen to the music stylings of Rick Jones:

The ladies love it, too!

But there's always a heckler...

Dude, maybe you shouldn't heckle a guy who was taught to fight by Captain America?!?

Make that--you definitely shouldn't heckle a guy who was taught to fight by Captain America!!

Later, Rick is a superstar on the rise!!

No doubt about it--

Rick Jones--better than Snapper Car in every possible way!!

From Captain Marvel #18 (1969) & #20 (1979)

Rick Jones is taking Namor to a swinging nightclub, because Rick Jones knows everybody, and why the hell hasn't he been in a Marvel movie yet? Oh, yeah the nightclub is called the Electric Seaweed.

Checks out the scene, bro!

Trippy!!

But Namor discovers that it's not so easy to go incognito...

Or is it??

Wait wait wait. Namor is a folk hero to surface world eco-fans?!? And they wear "Namor-lobes" as a tribute/fashion statement?

Man, the Marvel Universe is one freaky place to live!!

Should we tell these guys that Namor's many, many attempts to destroy/conquer the surface world no doubt caused vast ecological damage?

Oh, and Rick's got a gig here. Let's groove along!

Ah, that karaoke favorite, The Feast Of The Atomic Beast. Strange, I can't find that song on YouTube...

From Sub-Mariner #30 (1970)

Everyone mocks poor Betty Cooper for playing the tambourine.

She knows the truth, though...

You know it, Betty. Shake it until you make it!

Reason #201,654 why Betty is better than Veronica...

From Archie #197 (1970)

You all know how much I love faux rock bands in comic books. And I especially love them when the comic creators try oh so hard to get hip and cool.

It's 1967, and Dell is making their brief (and futile) attempt to capitalize on the super-hero market. Four teenage heroes, known as the Fab Four, are going to investigate some shenanigans at a rock concert:

Yes, it is Mr. Mod and his Bird!!


Well, that's an evil plan!

And so...


Yes, we all want Mod!!


Ginchy!

And lest you think that's not a real song...

It's by Bo Bylan, who no doubt is the voice of his generation.!

The song has the desired effect--even on our heroes:


And apparently, the "foreign ministers conference" is a conference of foreign ministers from 1893:

Indubitably!

SPOILER ALERT: The Fab Four break free of the spell and save the day. Mr. Mod and his Bird are captured. The conference of foreign ministers approved the Treaty Of The Durand Line. Their comic is promptly cancelled. Dell never tried the heady mix of trendy super-heroes and modern music again.

From Superheroes #4 (1967)

Y'all know my deep and abiding love for faux rock bands in comic books.

And then there's faux comic bands that play Gotham City...


And what's so special about Blister Twister?!?

A band that does only heavy metal versions of Simon and Garfunkel? That might be the most Gotham City thing ever.

And of course, being Gotham...

...a demented criminal mime attacks the show!

And the crowd goes wild!

Fortunately, you-know-who is on the scene...

...with Robin's help, he takes her out...

...and the crowd goes wild!!

But the show must go on!!

And Robin approves!

FACT: Max Alan Collins called titled this story "The Sound Of Silence." Me, I would have titled it "Parsley, Sage, Rosemary and Mime." Or maybe "Parsley, Sage, Rosemary and Crime."

Once again, you can see why I'm not allowed to write comic books.

From Batman #412 (1987)

I know, some of you young whipper-snappers are asking, "How did you old folks survive prior to MTV? How did you get your recommended daily allowance of music videos, live performances, and rock star news, without a 24/7 cable channel?"

The answer, my friends, is: pay $8 apiece (or more) for reels of film to play on your 8mm home projector!!

Sure, it was hella expensive, and the selection wasn't too great, but it beat waiting around for American Bandstand or Ed Sullivan or Top Of The Pops or whatever to show what you wanted!!

I have to ask, though...as great as the Beatles were--35 films of them, and only 2 of Bowie? Only one of The Who? Shameful!!

Ad from Betty & Veronica #216 (1973)

Let's get this out of the way: my sister was a HUGE fan of the Partridge Family, so I was exposed to waaaay to much of it in my impressionable youth.



Well, whatever the reason, I can't be too harsh on the show, or the "band." Perfectly typical early 70s sitcom, and perfectly serviceable (and ofttimes quite catchy pop-rock). So sue me.

And of course, they had their own comic book:

Again, a mostly harmless adaptation of a mostly harmless sitcom about a mostly harmless faux band. It was the early 70s, man!

But indulge me for one second, as I present every single advertisement from this particular comic book:











Yeah, Charlton managed some incredible synergy here, with almost every ad being Partridge Family related. No Sea Monkeys, no X-ray glasses,  no Grit or greeting card salesman offers, no Kung Fu lessons. If nothing else, Charlton certainly knew to tailor the ads to the book's audience!

But if you look more closely, you'll see that every single ad--all of them--have you sending money to Charlton Publishing HQ, and making your checks payable to Charlton. EVERY. ONE.

Charlton Publishing did publish and distribute magazines, including Hit Parader and Song Hits. I don't think they ever owned Tiger Beat, but maybe as a distributor they worked out a deal to get a bunch of copies of their Partridge Family specials. Or maybe it was just part and parcel of their Partridge Family license.

Whatever the circumstances, I find it fascinating that at a time when comics were still very dependent on advertising dollars, Charlton found a way to not only eliminate outside ads, but to have every single ad causing people to mail them money.

Anyway, enjoy some song lyrics:

From Partridge Family #15 (1973)

Batman and Two-Face are in trouble!!

So new protege Duke rides in to help:


Say, what the hell is that music he's playing? Let's listen to some more:



Man, I'm not sure what the hell that is...I'm not even sure how you'd play
as a musical note...

Perhaps Duke can explain?



So, wait...A group of ex-Arkham inmates puts together a death-metal band that plays impossible notes and mocks Batman with their very name?!? That may be the most Gotham thing ever...

Of course, given the difficulty of superheroes trademarking their own names (as likely that would mean having to reveal their own identities, or having a stand-in do it for them, putting their lives in jeopardy), Bruce probably couldn't sue. Then again, maybe Bruce *did* trademark the bat symbol and the rest during Batman Incorporated...? And of course Booster Gold did, so...

This probably means that pretty much every DC city of punk/metal/folk bands based upon/mocking heroes, right?

"Batman's @^$&^"? Hrm...

From All-Star Batman #3 (2016)