This one is a triple whammy.  It is a Film which has a (pointless) U.S. Remake.  It is a Romance Film (of sorts), so it works for Valentine's Day.  Its Remake is opening today.

Could the fates align any more for me than they did for this couple you'll see below?  Read on...
A Swedish Couple are taking a long overdue vacation in the French Alps.  What could go wrong?
The family is close-knit, although tiny cracks are visible if you look close enough.

As an American, this looks odd to me.  Is it just our cultural hang-ups?
On Day 2 of the Trip, Lunch is interrupted by an Avalanche.  Not a SPOILER, since, you know, the Poster.

What he does in the face of this peril is what matters- he runs off on his own.
This event traumatizes everyone, the children included.

As time goes on, the Husband refuses to admit what he did.  Is he denying it to her or himself?
With the experience troubling everyone, can the arrival of some friends help them out?

Fun Fact: the last time I watched a Swedish Film being remade in America, it also had the guy from Game of Thrones in it.  Weird.
Can their marriage survive the vacation?  Can they work things out?  Will anything be the same?

To find out, watch the Golden Globe-nominated Film?  I saw it on Tubi, but it is on others too.
A good Film, although it is not an easy watch.  Cringe Comedy is a big thing.  Mainstream Films like Meet the Parents reveled in it and it has never gone away.  This is *close* to that.  It is definitely not a Comedy as its main Genre.  The Film is much more of a Human Drama that has some good Comedy elements in it.  I'm guessing the balance will be off with Downhill, a Film who's Title is just asking for bad Reviews and/or commentary on the Stars' Careers.  It is easy to see why the Film managed to strike a chord with Audiences and receive critical acclaim.  It is well-Acted.  It is well-Written.  It is well-shot.  The Director apparently started out learning how to make Films about Skiing and used that to form the basis of this Film.  It is one of those Films that simmers and comes to a slow boil like a teapot.  The reaction to the Film's key moment isn't a sudden outburst or big fight.  It is an awkward silence.  It is a tentative discussion.  It is rising tensions that finally come to the surface when the Wife wants closure.  The Film asks tough questions and presents very real characters.  It is a nice change of pace from just straight-up watching bad Horror Films with generic Plots.  I'm not a Film Snob by any means, so it is nice to indulge on occasion.  The Film doesn't really need a Remake, especially since a third of the dialogue is in English anyhow!  In the wake of Parasite's big win, can't we get over Foreign Remakes just for the hell of it?  To be honest, the worst thing I can say about this Film is its Swedish Title being far too close to that of a bad Johnny Depp Film's one...
A good, but uncomfortable Film.  If you are married, have been married or know married people, it will make you think...and squirm.

Alright, I finally get to see the Film that traumatized my Dad back in 2019.  No joke- that happened.  Will I be as disturbed?
A woman goes through some traumatic events (no SPOILERS as to what) and needs some comfort.

Her barely-there boyfriend ends up inviting her on their trip to Sweden.
They end up deep in the Woods with what is obviously a Cult celebrating the Midsummer Festival.
The group is full of interesting customs and feel like they are right of a Jodorowsky Film.

They are probably (definitely) evil, but you have to admire their style.
Can you trust people that won't let you leave, keep giving you LSD and carry big mallets?
As things start to get real (weird), will they finally figure out that they need to get the hell out of there?!?
Is anyone going to survive?  Will you ever feel safe going to Sweden?

To find out, watch the Film.  It's on Streaming, including with Amazon Prime (as I saw it).
A dark, but beautiful Film.  There are two key aspects of the Film to discuss.  First- the visuals.  The Movie looks beautiful.  If it didn't have all of the blood, death and murder, it would be a lovely travelogue for Sweden.  I really want to go now- I just don't want to be alone with any of the people there.  It's a complex emotional balance for sure.  I hope the Cinematographer and Director of Photography get lots of work based on what I saw here.  The other aspect- the dark as hell Plot.  Is it similar to The Wicker Man?  Yes.  It is the same Film?  No.  It has alot of stuff that is exclusive to itself too.  The Film works on its own, which is obviously quite nice.  The Acting is strong.  The Pacing is consistent.  The Film, as noted, looks amazing.  I know it is easy to just go 'It is just The Wicker Man.'  If you want a Film that is *actually* that, it would be this Film and not Midsommar...
A bleak, but gorgeous Film.  If you can stand the big scares and dark story, it is a winner.

A man goes crazy from watching too many Horror Films- should I be worried?  This is 1995's Evil Ed, a Horror Comedy that sure is strange.  Despite its silly nature, the Film is actually a form of...political protest?  Am I reading that right?  Yes, yes it is.  In this Film's home Country (Sweden), Films- especially Action and Horror- were being brutally-chopped up to meet some sort of strange standard.  Basically, the Films had to be okay to be seen in the Pence Household or on a Mormon Campus.  I can see why people had a problem with this.  The Film is about the titular Ed being forced to edit a series of fictional films.  As time goes on, his insanity grows with his isolation and he just plain loses it.  It would have helped to see his girlfriend and kid...but all of her Scenes were cut to make the Film run faster.  Wah-wah!  Fun fact: the Co-Writer of this Film would go on to work in Special Effects and Make-up, leading to such Film Credits as Prince Caspian, Star Wars: Rogue One and The Last Jedi.  No, really.  Is this just an excuse to mock Censors and show lots of gore?  To find out, read on...
In the Cold Open, a Film Editor has clearly gone crazy, cutting up Film in a locked room and blowing himself up with a grenade in the mouth.
In his place, Ed is called up from the European Art Division to finish Editing Loose Limbs 5.

I'd make fun of how silly of a Title that is for a Series, but the Violent Shit Series exists.
He has no choice to edit the Films- which are terrible compilations of gore scenes- and he has to do so at the Boss' Cabin, since 'they are out of Office Space.'

Yeah, that's the face I'd make at that logic too.
At the Cabin, he starts to see things- weird things.  This guy- also played by a Writer- tells him to kill people and purify the World.

Consider he had to watch a woman be raped by a Beaver (not shown- just to be clear), this seems like a fair statement.  Go, Bad Guy from Star Trek: Insurrection!
After more Films and more freak-outs, the Boss comes over and appears to transform into...the Albino version of The Devil from Legend?

It's that or he's from Nightbreed- decide which stolen design you think is best.
He goes more and crazy after killing the Boss, finding time to kill people that broke in to rob the House.
On the plus side, the Film has great Props.  You really need to give them, well, props.
He's eventually shot enough to be taken in by the Cops...to a Hospital...but he freaks out again.

How Ed now has super-strength is anyone's guess.  Is it Voodoo?
The whole Third Act goes in a weird, Peter Jackson-style direction as the Delivery Guy (also at the Hospital due to Ed) has to become an action hero.

The SWAT Guys can't kill Ed, but he can.  He suddenly becomes a Narrator and the Film ends.
A good time, even if it only has so many ideas.  The concept of the guy going crazy is good.  The Movie bit we see are especially ridiculous and silly, even for '90s Slasher fare.  This random guy- dubbed by Bill Moseley!- is cutting up Hookers and chopping off feet for fun.  The Film makes reference a few times to a Scene where 'A woman is raped by a Beaver and then has her head blown off by a Bazooka.'  To be clear, it is not in the Film and they never actually shot it.  No conspiracy theory about lost footage- it just isn't real!  The freak-out scenes are definitely the best part of the Film.  You get unique creatures (see below), strange ones (like 2 above) and familiar, but good ones (the Albino Devil).  When it is at its weakest is when it suddenly switches to an Action Comedy a la Bad Taste at the end.  The SWAT Team can't take down one Editor.  Should I be more worried about how bad-ass my Editor is now?!?  There are good moments, but it feels drawn out.  I think a longer build up to actual murder would have been better personally.  As a Horror Satire, the Film works well.  As a Three Act Film, Evil Ed has issues.  Movies like this or I Bought A Vampire Motorcycle have this same issue, as do many others.  Nobody quite nailed it as well as Dead Alive, did they?  This weird Gremlins thing is my favorite part all the same though- bar none!
Next time, I cover an infamous Film from long ago.  Is it actually that bad if you give it a chance though?  Stay tuned...

Before you get Taken to see the Remake (by the same Director) with Liam Neeson, check this one out.  It just has more Subtitles- don't be scared...
In a fictional Norwegian Town, Stellan Skarsgard's Son is killed by Mobsters.  They cover it up by drugging him with Heroin.  It fools the Police.
The distraught man meets his Son's friend- who escaped- tell him the truth.
He has to make a decision- live with this knowledge or do something drastic.
Since it's a Movie, he does the latter.  He targets the members of the Mob, even if they later broke out on Game of Thrones!
When that doesn't pan out so well, he has to make some more drastic choices.  I won't SPOIL this one though.
Can he avenge his son?  Will a Mob War destroy his Town?  Will anyone survive?

To find out, watch the Film.
A weird Film, but in a good way.  The best comparison I can make is to stuff like In Bruges or The Guard.  That's not to say that this Film is unoriginal- not by a longshot!  

We get a unique Lead, real stakes, great visuals (with the stark Winter landscape), strange humor, sudden bursts of violence and some occasional morals.  It's certainly an odd one!  In the middle of all of the Plot, there are weird bits of seemingly-random nonsense.  For instance, the bad guys randomly crack a joke about our Hero's last name- Dickman- and amuse themselves.  The Villain's Cover for his criminal empire is that he's a Vegan Baking Magnate!  A kidnapping turns into...something sweet.  Fruit Loops becomes a Plot Point for a few minutes. 

I watched this the way I *try* to watch all Foreign Films- with the original Track and Subtitles.  That actually adds another layer of fun.  

Hearing someone say 'Fruit Loops' in that accent (and with great derision).  

Hearing someone speak Norwegian with a visible Asian- vague SPOILER, kind of- accent is fun.  Hearing the bits of English- like a line from Top Gun!- intermixed is also fun.  

This Film is not quite the Action Film that the new one is being sold as.  That one has the same Director, but a new Writer.  

No matter what happens, we'll always have this weird little Film to enjoy and, hopefully, more to come from this Director in America.  

That said, this Poster for the Remake is just...so derivative.
A strange, but striking Film.  It has a great visual flair and a way of catching you off-guard with its weird blend of humor, bloody violence and Drama.

After two silly Films I recommend for a laugh, how about a serious one that failed to make an impact?  Let's jump right in...
In a Cold Open, we see two girls living in a bleak environment.  One of them makes a bold move to escape, leaving the other behind...
In the present, Lisbeth continues her campaign to punish the guilty, getting the better of a wife-beating CEO (in more ways than one).
She's hired by a Scientist to steal his creation, since he fears it being used to start a Nuclear War!
As you can imagine, something this valuable draws the attention of other people- people with guns!

Who are the Spiders?
Lisbeth turns to an old friend for help, as he is facing a need for a subject to cover.  It's a win-win...were it not for the constant threat of death and dismemberment.
As if *that* wasn't enough, her earlier theft brings an American Operative to take her out too.

Can she solve the mystery and survive to tell the tale?  To find out, watch the Film.
Hey- this doesn't suck!  Despite the Trailers and Marketing giving 90% of the Plot away and marketing it as a dumb Action Film, there's more here.  I don't pretend to be an expert here.  I haven't read all of the Books- original and newly-licensed ones.  I haven't watched every Film in the Series.  If that means that my positive Review is meaningless to you, so be it.  With that out of the way, I liked this one quite a lot.  The Pacing was good, it looked nice and the Plot had some nice twists and turns.  Yes, the Marketing gave away the twist- worth mentioning twice.  Lisbeth is treated quite well here, being shown to be both competent, good at planning and...vulnerable?  Yes, she doesn't predict everything and always come out ahead immediately.  She's still the Heroine, but everything doesn't come easily all the time.  It's a tricky balance to get, but I think they nailed it pretty well.  All of the Actors do a good job and I think that the Characters are presented well.  Given that this is a Soft Reboot...or a Sequel to the English Remake...or a Sequel to the 3 Swedish Films, it's still good.  The Film failed to make a profit in Theaters (so it seems), so this may be a one-and-done.  At least this is a complete Story and Film with no Sequel Bait, so I guess it could be worse.  One big plus for the Film- it's weird, James Bond Film-style Opening Credits...
Considering that this follows an American Remake and long wait, this one worked for me.  Put aside your concerns and at least give this a look.

Is this one of the worst Films of 2017?  Will it make my worst of *my* 2018 List in December?  Let's see...
Harry Hole is a depressed, alcoholic Detective who keeps his job due to past achievements.

This would be more important if we knew the guy and if this wasn't based on THE SEVENTH BOOK IN THE SERIES.  Come on!

Plus, Harry Hole.  Tee-hee.
After a long absence, a Serial Killer known as The Snowman (not to be confused with The Iceman) returns and seems to have a grudge against Harry.

He must have very cold hands though.
To make things hard to follow, we get random cuts to the previous investigation into the killer from 9 Years ago.  The Detective- Val Kilmer (and his awful Voice Dubbing).

I don't dare poke fun at the man for his legitimate illness and how it affected him, but...wow, this is distracting.  Even in a good Movie, it is jarring.
Speaking of jarring, how about a drawn-out, pointless Sub-Plot with J.K. Simmons?  

Great.
Can Hole and his new Partner- with her own secrets- find out who the killer is before too many die?
Will the final showdown be epic or just watching snow melt? 

By the end, will you even care?

To find out, watch this (arguably) modern anti-Classic.
This is not good.  To be clear, there are many ways to be a Bad Movie.  

You could be Arty, but so in love with your own nonsense that nearly nobody can 'get it.'  

You can be cheap and just look terrible.  

You can try to fill too much Plot into too little time and just confuse your audience.  

You could be an Ed Wood Film.  

The Snowman isn't quite any of those.  At its best, the Film is shot well and looks nice.  Having just recently seen the Episode of Black Mirror set in Norway, this felt familiar.  Unlike that Episode, all of the Drama is lacking here.  For starters, we are beginning way too late in a Character's journey and just told stuff that happened.  We don't feel for Harry like we need to for this to work.  

If they had made a good Adaptation of a previous Book (or six) and we saw how he got to this sad, pathetic state, that would be different.  Instead, it is just 'See this drunk cop- know that you should feel bad about this.'  I really didn't.  Another thing it does is just simply cheat with the mystery.  Without SPOILing too much, one Character's big reveal is obvious the moment they give you a slight hint...so they just don't give it to you for no reason until halfway through the Film.  

There's obviously an issue with the Editing, as a good chunk of the Film was not actually done (anywhere between 10-20%).  Things like Pick-Up Shots (showing a man going to a Car) are missing, so the Film is extra-choppy at times.  

It is not unwatchable and, if anything, seems worse than it actually is because the good parts- like the Cinematography- are so good.  If it all sucked, it would just become a nebulous void.  

This is what it would be like to watch one Back-Up Dancer at a Michael Jackson Concert messing up every third move...but be the only one doing it.  Make sense?  

In the End, this is, well, bad.  I'll let Chloe Sevigny sum it up with her facial expression here.
To be honest, I was hoping to have a more visceral reaction.  It is mostly just pretty, but emotionally numb (when they aren't dubbing Kilmer, of course) and listless.