There can be only one!

Well, that's not actually true.
I found like a dozen different Highlander Posters.

To be more accurate...

There can be only this one (right now)!
...um, this is a weird way to sell it.

Is this The Kurgan?
Maybe.

Does this represent the Film at all?
Hell no!

What in the what is this?!?

**Sorry about the lack of updates and slow work last week.  I'll work on that for this week.  Sorry, Alien Tracker and Nemesis Game**

Who wants to live forever...if you have to watch this crap.  Today's movie is Highlander: The Source.  Here's what you need to know (even if you know nothing about Highlander): there are Immortals.  They fight day in and day out to win 'The Prize.'  It's either Death, Mortality or the ability to have children (depending on the show/film).  After one good movie, they made a crap sequel that called the Immortals 'aliens' and was quickly hated.  Another sequel followed, with slightly-better results.  Around this time, they made a TV show of it, which introduced most people to Adrian Paul for the first time.  This was followed by Highlander: Endgame, an attempt to merge the show and movie universes together (unless you count pointless Connor McLeod appearances in the show), which resulted in more rule-breaking, silly plot twists and audience disdain.  For some freaking reason, they decided to come back to the show/movie universe one more time to 'wrap things up, while opening up new stories' (as they say in the Making Of Featurette).  Why not stop when you're already so far behind?!?  The plot jumps way ahead of Endgame and the show, immediately starting to alienate the fan-base.  They proceed to shit all over the Mythos (as opposed to the Methos) and slowly strip away everything that the fans loved.  To make things better, they barely explain the back-story and plot, leaving people that didn't watch the show (i.e. me) pretty in the dark.  The plot involves the search for the titular Source, which they think will...actually, they never really ask what it does.  Plot says go there, so, well, go there!  A new villain is here named The Guardian who, well, I'll get to him later.  To find out how horribly this goes awry (even by Highlander film standards), read on...
In classic 'bad movie fashion,' the DVD Menu tells you to *not watch* the movie.  Seriously, if you love the show/films, that image alone will make you want to eject the Disc!!!
In the near future of 'We Didn't Pick A Time,' the World is in shit.  It's so bad (in Bulgaria) that Duncan McLeod stalks the streets like Batman!
The Guardian- that blurry thing on the right- is who guards The Source.  He's a big, old pile of fail.  Silly look- white skin and armor-, silly motivations- leaving The Source to...um, guard it- and he has a silly, super-speed power.

Yes, kill the fighting...in a f@$%ing Highlander movie!
The Guardian is just an awful and silly character.  In the film's only Quickening scene, he shouts out 'The Quickening.'  Ugh.  In another scene, he yells out 'Hello, Joe'...while flying about 20 feet after being hit by Joe's truck.  Double ugh.
Our heroes go to this random Monastery and meet the fat Vampire from Blade...I mean, an original character who tells them where 'The Source' is.

He also explains that they will lose their Immortality as they approach The Source.  Wait- what?!?
In an amazingly-unsubtle moment, The Source finally decides to just rip away any recognizable aspects of the Mythos in one smooth move.  The Guardian breaks Duncan's iconic sword in half and stabs Joe Dawson- a longtime Supporting Character- with it, killing him.  Joy.
The movie makes sure to throw in a random fight scene with some 'cannibals.'  I'm sorry, but why does this happen?  Quota, you say?
Skipping some random crap, Duncan goes to The Source as the planets align (don't ask).  His lady friend is there, because...um, symbolism, I guess.
Duncan beats The Guardian using his own cheesy, super-speed powers.  Instead of killing him, he chooses peace...which kills The Guardian.  Odd moral there.

In The End, he is given The Prize, which is the ability to have children.  Thus, the Highlander franchise ends (since this movie bombed) with the Space Baby from 2001: A Space Odyssey.  Joy.
Just cut my head off now, please!  The plot of this movie is stupid.  To begin with, it's just stupid.  They have to find the Immortal 'Holy Grail' in order to become mortals and gain fertility?  Congratulations, you're fighting an uphill battle to become a Quiver Full Member!  Second, this movie insults and tears apart every aspect of the Mythos.  Characters are either killed (Joe) or completely-wasted (Methos).  The story is designed to make everything you know before into a big lie.  Seriously, the point is that The Game is all a lie, or at least represented as something that it's not.  Methos and Duncan say this outright, so f#$! you, people that liked the previous films, show and other forms of media!  This was apparently designed to set up a whole bunch of new story-lines for films...but those never took place.  The series, instead, ends with the people behind Highlander: The Source telling you to go screw yourself.  Oh joy.  Here's a big problem: this movie doesn't explain any of the major characters/events all that well.  Who is Joe?  Who are The Watchers?  Who is Methos?  What is The Prize?  If you don't know, tough shit!  I'm here as a neophyte, but know people who have watched the show a lot, allowing me some context.  If you didn't, you'll struggle even more to care about this Duncan guy and wonder who the hell the Watchers are!  In summary, it's a shit movie that alienates the audience coming into it and makes sure that no new viewers can make sense of it.  Good riddance, even if you did randomly flash the audience...
Next up, I wrap up July with a Project Terrible film.  I hope you like bickering and bears.  Stay tuned...

Well, it's not Highlander 2.  For those not aware, here is the basic story.  A surprise hit was made in 1986 called Highlander, a film starring Christopher Lambert as the immortal Connor McLeod who has to battle The Kurrgan to gain 'the prize.'  It was neat, clever and wrapped up nicely.  So, naturally, they made a sequel...which was set in a post-apocalyptic future...and said that the immortals were aliens from the planet Zeist.  It sucked.  It really sucked.  A while later, an attempt was made to fix everything.  The result- today's film.  They basically ignored that film and made a sequel to Highlander alone.  Yes, Highlander 3 ignores Highlander 2!  Basically, we get a film cheat and Connor gets 'the prize' taken away from him.  Can he defeat the new villain (who is actually from 400 years in his past)?  Find out in...
We get some opening narration from Connor himself, since the THIRD film is the best time to jump into a film series.  By the way, Lambert has a very severe Myopia, thus explaining that stare.
Sometime between the beginning of Highlander and the rest of it, McLeod went to Japan and trained with a wizard/swordsman (Mako).  Unfortunately, Kane kills the wizard...but gets trapped in the cave for 400 years.
He gets out, taking the prize away from Connor.  This seems in contrast to some statements made in the film, but they just want you to ignore it.  Kind of like how I'm supposed to ignore how fake that wig is!
Nearly an hour in, the two finally fight for real.  This is marred by a couple of things.  First- the fight is only decent.  Second- it ends abruptly.  Third- they fight while swinging on ropes...and Peebles stunt double is given a close-up!
McLeod is also very bad at hiding his immortality, as shown by these pictures he has hanging on his walls.  That's...stupid.
Kane discovers McLeod's adopted son when he happens to break in when the kid calls.  This allows him to trick the kid into coming into his clutches.  More importantly, however, there is the fact that McLeod has an autographed head-shot of his 'son' on his desk!
Speaking of important, did you know that you could stand on illusions.  They're not just for your eyes anymore!
In The End, McLeod wins the day and gets his AHHH! QUICKENING, regaining the prize and living happily ever after...until Highlander: The Series...and Highlander: Endgame.
Well...it's not Highlander 2.  The plot of this movie is a bit goofy and has its fair share of holes.  It doesn't do anything on par with the Planet Zeist, a solar shield or Ramirez being resurrected just because McLeod thinks about him while getting a Quickening.  By the way, that is not a euphemism!  That said, I have many questions and/or complaints.  How does he lose 'the prize' because the guy gets freed from his cave?  Who exactly decides when 'The Game' is over?  Why is it all a trick played on Michael Douglas?  Wait- wrong Game.  Seriously though, the movie tries desperately to be as interesting as the first film.  To that end, they pretty much rip it off.  Dead mentor?  Check.  Evil villain who kills him?  Check.  Villain has a 'K-name?'  Check.  By the way, every major Highlander film has a villain with a 'K-name.'  Odd, right?!?  Is the film good?  No, not really.  It has some neat moments in it, but there is not enough action, good plot or overall atmosphere.  Oh yeah, they also use an Airport in Montreal to double for Newark International.  See for yourself...
Next up, with Witchboard 2 M.I.A., that leaves the other sequel to review.  Chuck someone out a window, Whitesnake!  Stay tuned...
  

* Apparently there are two different cuts of the film- the American one and the European one.  The latter cuts nearly all shots of magic from the film.

Magic has no place in a film about immortals trying to claim 'the prize!'

* In addition, there are a few different releases between VHS and DVD.  Besides the regular version, there is a Director's Cut and a 2005 re-release of the Director's Cut.  However, there is a catch...

-This version is actually the European version of the film!  Director's Cut, my ass!

Highlander was an easy film to rip off.  As history has shown, a bunch of people have done this.  Naturally, Lorenzo Lamas was on board for this one...
Well, it does have more shirtless men than any Highlander poster I've ever seen.  I can only assume that those two tiny figures are the villain and hero.  Who needs context when you have vague lines about 'journeys beyond time?'

Up next, there's one factor that greater than any other.  That is, of course, The Alien Factor.  Stay tuned...