Alright- I think I'm done 'spamming' my own Page with these for a while after this one.

I'm allowed to do it to myself, right?  Cool.

In any event, one last Howling Poster to show.  Das ist gut?
No- not every Blonde Supermodel ever!!!

Incidentally, that Tagline is a real awkward translation in Babelfish.  It's basically talking about your animal side trying to get out or something.  I wish I still knew an Austrian fella.

Here's the original, complete with a possible nipple or two.  I covered them on the Redo.
I'm obviously-biased, but it does look better with some more color.

I still got more of these!  Thank you, Internet.

This time, it is a Howling Poster from all of the way over in Denmark.  Seems logical enough...
Damn!

I'm not sure if she is being chased by a Werewolf or a Demon Bat, but I love it!

As always, the Original Version...
Same basic Poster, but with a little more color and style.

Since I'm not so lacking for content to post the same Poster twice, here's the French Canadian Poster as well...
C'est bon.

Thanks to some fortuitous web searching, I've got PLENTY of these that I haven't used before.

We all love The Howling.  Let's see how the folks over in Thailand were sold this Classic...
Alright then.

On the plus side, there weren't any colors they missed there.  Good for them.

The original now, just for contrast...
Basically the same- just with less shine.  I turned it up to 11.  I'm sure that Joe Dante doesn't mind.

What's old is crap again!  

To be fair, this is not the worst Howling film.  

I'm not sure if that's Howling V or VII, but I lean more towards the latter right now.  

Here's the thing- this movie has no identity.  Most of the Howling films have an identity, right or wrong.  

Howling II is the bat-shit magic one (midget and all).  

Howling III is the strange, comedy one.  

Howling V is the 'Scooby-Doo' one, etc.  

This film is just about Werewolves in a High School.  Granted- they do keep the Howling rule of just making up new, random Werewolf powers.  

Seriously- Alpha Werewolves?  That might be considered a thing (but it isn't), but I don't think that it works the way they think it does.  

In all fairness, the movie has some decent moments and doesn't really 'suck.'  I would like less of a Twilight story and more of a horror tale though.  

Nice job marketing the film to Twi-hards, only to insult them in the Trailer!  

The only thing that would be dumber is if they suddenly had flamethrowers.  Oh...
Next up, a week full of Crazy Foreign Flicks.  First up, the other (available) German Herbie films.  Stay tuned...

Thanks, Clive Turner.  Seriously, this guy manages to completely destroy any remote amount of goodwill that Howling VI established.  How does he do that?  By making sure that the last three films are all tied to this one, in spite of logic to the contrary.  Oh yeah- that happened!  Here's the thing- Clive Turner clearly went a little crazy as he took on more and more responsibility.  For Howling IV, he was a Producer and played a cameo role (more on that later).  By the time that Howling VII came along in 1994, he was the Writer/Director/Editor/Producer/Star.  Holy crap- he pulled a Bill Hinzman (R.I.P.)!  The next step to making the film ridiculous- filming it in a real, Western town and only using a few trained actors.  Given the level of Turner's performances in Howling IV and V, I don't consider him one either.  This movie really challenges the mind by refusing to focus on a plot for too long and having its minor plot seem stupid as hell.  To find out the sheer ridiculousness of it all, read on...
Clive Turner is here playing an Australian cowboy-wannabe.  He goes to Pioneer Town to...be a Red Herring.
First sign of cheapness- a Priest and Investigator discuss pointless exposition, setting up clips from Howling V.  Ugh.
Second- the randomly-found body in the Desert was supposedly at the Carnival from Howling VI.  As a bonus, the lady Extra was in Howling V.  This is a plot point.

Oh yeah, this was also on a VHS Tape that the Priest had.  How?
99.9% of the monster footage in the film is just Red P.O.V. vision.  This is really sad.

Considering that the rest of the movie involves robotic line-dancing, bad bar jokes and a sub-plot involving Chili, this is still the best part.
The Howling V connection is important because Turner- who was Ray in that film- is the same character...but he's named Ted.  Oh yeah, he freaking died in that movie too!!!
Speaking of dead people, the lead from Howling IV is back and alive.  She dumps exposition- save for the part where she dies circa The Hills Have Eyes II- and then dies in her only other scene.

Thanks for coming, Romy!
As it turns out, the villain of this saga is Mary-Lou aka The Dumb Girl from Howling V.  Clearly her random cameo in a crowd shot from Howling VI sets this up!
It gets better!  Using new, random Werewolf powers, she takes over the body of a different lady in town as part of her elaborate plan to cover up her murders...which she was planning before she even did them.  Brilliant!
With about two minutes left in the film, she transforms her into a Werewolf (FINALLY!!!).  She runs outside, only to be shot (off-camera) by the rest of the town.

Her pointlessly-elaborate plan to...um, do something has failed.  The End.
Screw you, Pioneer Town!  This movie is a serious, serious mess.  There are more stupid, stupid things about the movie than you could shake a giant stick at.  For one, the plot is a ridiculous mess.  It attempts to connect three separate Howling films to a brand new one that barely has a plot to begin with.  Even if you get past the Retcons and silliness, there is just nothing of note there.  Why does Mary-Lou go there?   Why set up this elaborate plot to get a guy who may or may not be a Werewolf in trouble?  Speaking of which, the lady from Howling IV says that Ted was a Werewolf, showing the clip from the film.  The problem- he's not.  Was it just to trick the audience?  Speaking of tricking the audience, there's almost no interesting footage for this film.  It's a bunch of comedy skits and exposition dumps.  The only F/X shots before the end come courtesy of flashbacks to Howling IV/Howling V.  Oh wait- there is one second of a Werewolf in a scene where a Cop is killed.  Oh right- that's actually Stock Footage from Howling IV (where Pretender guy gets bit)!  If you like line-dancing, bad jokes and terrible actors, but hate story and F/X shots, this is the film for you.  There's just something so...off about it.  On the plus side, Clive Turner hasn't Produced a film since 1996.  That and I get to re-use this silly F/X shot...
Up next, the final and most recent film in the series.  Is calling it The Howling: Twilight an insult or an accurate assessment?  Stay tuned...

There's nothing original about you!  This fourth film in the Howling franchise is essentially a Remake of the first film.  To be fair, it is based more closely on the original book than the first film.  Of course, the film thrives in spite of/because of those changes, so this seems a bit silly.  The other thing is that this film also takes liberties with the story from the first book, making me a bit curious.  Why are you the 'strict version' of the story, but you also change things?  It's a bit hypocritical, if you ask me.  This film, like I said, is essentially the same story of the Howling, but with all of the humor cut out, all of the cameos cut out and none of the good effects.  It's practically the 'High School Production' Version of The Howling.  Thanks, Clive Turner!  To cover this film, I'll do more of a highlighting of differences/quirks than anything.  You know this story...kind of.  To find out how much they screwed this up, read on...
* This Writer is traumatized by...um, something.  Yeah, they cut out the famous killer and his entire influence on the plot.

* As a bonus, she has 'visions' of stuff that hasn't happened yet and people she doesn't even know.  Nice!
* Remember when I mentioned Slim Pickens as the Sheriff?  Well, this 'Larry Miller-looking' guy is his replacement.  Yeah, it's NOT the same!
* This lady is the replacement for the weird and exotic hippie lady from The Howling.  She's...a bit more like a bad Eartha Kitt impersonator than anything else.
* You, sir, are not Patrick Macnee.  That is all.
*  The exotic woman seduces our heroine's husband.  Unlike in the Dante version, he clearly starts the whole thing.  Thanks, Pretender douche!
* Eventually, the husband turns into a Werewolf...by melting into a puddle of goo.  No, really.  Who.  Wrote.  This.  Crap?!?!?
* I'm sorry, but I can't take any film seriously that things that THIS is scary.  I'll continue writing this film when I'm done laughing!!!
* In place of the awesome partially-Rick Baker creations, we get...wolves (read: dogs) running with a red glare on their eyes.  I'm sad now.
* Our heroine stops the Werewolves by burning down the Church- which they built- after ringing the bell- which they brought over from Bulgaria- and calling them there.

Unfortunately, she just stands around and waits to die.  Dumb-ass.
Yeah, I'll stick with the original.  This movie is just plain bad.  Where do I begin?  Much like Howling V, this film is a 'mystery.'  The problem- there is no mystery.  You could argue that Howling V did this better, even if the culprit is not exactly hard to spot.  In this film, you know that the town is full of Werewolves.  It's a damn Howling film- why wouldn't they be?!?  If you made some of them NOT Werewolves, that would have been a mystery worth the wait.  Second, the acting and Production is not good.  It's not God-awful, but it just feels cheap.  The Howling was over-budget, but made things work.  Hell, they shot the big transformation scene off-set because they ran out of money...and it looks good.  The other major problem- almost no Werewolves.  Aside from random shots, this movie only features a Werewolf about 70 minutes in...and it's for about three seconds.  All of the 'interesting parts' occur in the last twenty minutes.  To be fair, they have ONE good Werewolf, but he just stands around doing nothing.  Plus, it starts out as that goofy 'Wallace and Gromit' face you saw three pictures back.  One more thing- the whole Climax focuses on the Bell and it's power.  Who put it there?  The Werewolves.  It would be like a town of Vampires making a giant Water Tower in the center of the Town full of Garlic-tinted Holy Water!!!  To summarize- no action, no mystery and giant plot-holes.  As a final indignity, see where the film ran out of Wolves/Dogs that look like Wolves...
Next up, one of the most infamous Howling sequels.  Can Writer/Director/Producer/Star Clive Turner redeem his past works?  Stay tuned...

Before you get mad, I do like this movie!  I'm not reviewing the other classic, 1980 Werewolf film to rip it apart like some random camper.  No, I'm a Completionist and need to give this film its due in order to wrap up The Howling franchise.  Well, at least until they make another film...which I hope they don't.  I suppose you could argue that the Teen Wolf show is an extension of this franchise, but I'm not touching that show with a ten-foot pole.  If you don't know, The Howling is a tale of a woman who goes to a Commune to get over a stressful event, only to find a worse place to be.  It's a pretty simple plot, but there's enough layer to it- plus a mixed narrative- to keep the film interesting throughout.  Rather than do a full-review, this will be like my reviews of Ringu and Children of the Corn.  It will be more of a bullet-point review with highlights of interesting/strange moments.  To find out more that you may not have known about this film classic, read on...
* The introductory scene sets up the nightmare that haunts our heroine- an actress who has appeared in many crap films since.  Speaking of crappy films, Roger Corman shows up as a guy waiting to use the Phone Booth.
* Slim 'I was in Blazing Saddles' Pickens is here playing the Sheriff.  While that's interesting enough, wait to you see his 'replacement' in Howling IV.
* I love how the Werewolves turn into cartoons briefly.  I know it's just a budgetary thing, but it adds style IMHO.
* If you're watching for it, the film is chock full of nods to Wolves, wolf puns and Werewolf films.  Hell, half of the people in the Commune are named after Directors of Werewolf films!
* In my favorite shot of the film, the killer Werewolf reveals himself in full for the first time by casually walking in and taking a file away from the lady Reporter.  No silly jump scare or over-Edited crap.  He's just like 'I'll be taking this...'
* How do you know that you're watching a film made in the '70s or at the tail end of it?  When I have to censor out more than just boobs.  It's kind of a shame to cover these guys in smiley faces too...
 * I like to think of these as the Peter Gabriel Werewolves, since they're randomly claymation.  I get it- they probably had only one- maybe two- suit to work with.

Not a bad shot, but a bit odd for me.
 * For all of Joe Dante's more-comedic work, you have to give him credit for drama.  Look at that tear, people!  The End.
No complaints here.  I have very little bad things to say about the movie.  There are odd moments and some effects- like the claymation- that don't hold up as well.  There are very little films made over thirty years ago that don't have stuff like that, unless their Director keeps redoing their effects.  Screw you, Lucas.  Anyhow, this movie's only real fault is that it inspired so many crap sequels.  Obviously, I can't really blame them for that.  The other thing is that it does change key events from the novel.  Gary Bradner has been odd about what he allows and doesn't with his stories.  He sold the rights to Howling III...only to have it become about Were-supials and the spirit of Tasmanian Tigers.  If you want to see a closer adaptation to his original work, check out tomorrow's review.  If you want to check out the best version, watch this movie.  Do you need more of an excuse?  Okay, there's this Carradine Face...
Next up, the good fun ends with the fourth film...which is essentially a Remake.  Yes, it is a book...but you can move on.  Stay tuned...

As a man who owns many multi-film DVDs, I expect certain things.  

After all I have Waxwork I/II, Black Cobra I/II/III and Psycho II/III/IV on one-disc DVDs- not counting the numerous Martial Arts Collections I own.  

So, then I got into my DVD of Howling V/VI...
Okay, I'll click on Howling V- which for some reason added the 'The' back into the title- and check out the Menu...
...or the movie just starts.  That's lame.  Let's try (The) Howling VI...
Yes, that film has no Menu either!  These films are simply two VHS-rips of the films slapped onto one Disc, with just that simple screen and a one-minute video reel that plays when you put in the Disc.

Should I have expected more from a film series that was so cheap?  

How about a DVD release from a group called, I kid you not, The Timeless Media Group?  

I suppose not...