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Woman’s Entire Camera Roll Selfies Of Her Crying -
Woman Proud She Started The Booing -
Bank Gets House In Divorce -
Mass Grave Not Even That Big -
Handful Of Sour Patch Kids Grabbed For Trip To Mailbox -
Bacon Added -
New Study Finds 81 Percent Of Starbucks Patrons Silently Judging Each Other For Being There -
Display Of Genuine Enthusiasm Mocked -
Police Lose Planted Evidence -
Grandma Just Called To Talk About 1956 -
Old Thing Really Heavy -
Silent Protest Sparks Silent Debate -
Dept. Of Tautology Rereleases Report For Second Time -
Sixth Beer Steps In To Speak For Area Man -
Study: Majority Of Nation’s Sweat Now Produced From Eating Spicy Wings -
Wedding Ring Jammed Into Slot Machine -
Chess Onlooker Sees A Move You Can Do -
Amazing Psychic Bends Truth With Mind -
Pretty Girl Hugged With Both Arms -
Pretty Girl Hugged With Both Arms
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White House Plumber Reminds Staff That Only Donald J. Trump Commemorative Food Waste May Be Placed Down Donald J. Trump Commemorative Garbage Disposal WASHINGTON—Emphasizing that he was only going to tell them this one more time, White House plumber Terry Robertson reminded staff…
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Political Profile: Gregory Bovino Gregory Bovino is “commander at large” of the U.S. Border Patrol’s mass deportation efforts. The Onion takes a look at…
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Foreskin Scrapbooked MILL VALLEY, CA—Having proudly removed the piece of shriveled penile flesh from its bag and laid it next to her…
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