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Thursday, July 30, 2020

The Changing World

I saw this over at my friends blog, and no, I will not name her. Why? Because there are certain Anonymous folks going around and making threats, this post only re affirms these beliefs.


The days are getting very spiritually dark, my friends. This is all either the end of our society and culture and/or we’re very close to The Rapture. Please, if you don’t know Jesus Christ as your personal LORD and Saviour, give your heart to Him now before it’s too late. If it is The Rapture, it will get very, very bad indeed. 

I never dreamed that I would have to face the prospect of not living in the United States of America, at least not the one I have known all my life. I have never wished to live anywhere else. This is my home and I was privileged to be born here.

But today I woke up and as I had my morning coffee I realized that everything is about to change. No matter how I vote, no matter what I say, something evil has invaded our nation, and our lives are never going to be the same. I have been confused by the hostility of some friends. I look at people I have known all my life so filled with hate that they will agree with opinions that if the were in their right minds they would never express as their own. It’s absolutely unbelievable. I think that I may well have entered the Twilight Zone…..then I saw this and I think that it’s pretty close to describing how I feel.

I’m not starting a fight, but it is something to think about. This may open up a ton of outraged comments by some. Many who will argue how “wrong” this post is. My suggestion, save your time and effort! You’re not changing the reality of what we are living by trying to somehow justify this insanity. Nevertheless, I couldn’t resist because we are becoming the Twilight Zone. We have become a nation that has lost its collective mind!

• If a dude pretends to be a woman, you are required to pretend with him.

• Somehow it’s un-American for the census to count how many Americans are in America.

• Russians influencing our elections are bad, but illegals voting in our elections are good.

• It was cool for Joe Biden to “blackmail” the President of Ukraine, but it’s an impeachable offense if Donald Trump inquires about it.

• Twenty is too young to drink a beer, but eighteen is old enough to vote.

• People who have never owned slaves should pay slavery reparations to people who have never been slaves.

• Inflammatory rhetoric is outrageous, but harassing people in restaurants is virtuous.

• People who have never been to college should pay the debts of college students who took out huge loans for their degrees.

• Immigrants with tuberculosis and polio are welcome, but you’d better be able to prove your dog is vaccinated, or your child is vaccinated or they cannot attend school.

• Irish doctors and German engineers who want to immigrate must go through a rigorous vetting process, but any illiterate gang-bangers who jump the southern fence are welcome.

• $5 billion for border security is too expensive, but $1.5 trillion for “free” health care is not.

• If you cheat to get into college you go to prison, but if you cheat to get into the country you go to college for free.

• People who say there is no such thing as gender are demanding a female President.

• We see other countries going Socialist (a rebranded word for Communist) and collapsing, but it seems like a great plan to some of you.

• Some people are held responsible for things that happened before they were born, and other people are not held responsible for what they are doing right now.

• Criminals are catch-and-released to hurt more people, but stopping them is bad because it’s a violation of THEIR rights.

•People waving American flags at peaceful freedom rallies are considered dangerous and violent white nationalists who must be stopped yet anarchists burn, loot, and deface property while burning the American flag are powerful youth exercising their first amendment rights.

• And pointing out all this hypocrisy somehow makes us “racists”?!

Nothing makes sense anymore, no values, no morals, no civility and people are dying of a Chinese virus, but it racist to refer to it as Chinese even though it began in China. It’s also illegal to question the treatments or that it’s now disappearing on it’s own. We are clearly living in an upside down world where right is wrong and wrong is right, where moral is immoral and immoral is moral, where good is evil and evil is good, where killing murderers is wrong, but killing innocent babies is right, where darkness is light and light is now darkness.

Not my words but very accurate and disturbing!

Wednesday, July 29, 2020

Moving Along Hodgepodge

Joining in with the Hodgepodge on this Wednesday morning.

1. Last time you moved house? Something you've learned in moving house?

7 years ago when we moved from Sweet Home Alabama to here. It's ok folks to purge, seriously, it's ok. We had over 20 yrs of stuff to get rid of, then the tornado hit, that took care of most of it. Just saying. ANYWAYS, here we are thinking of moving yet again, are we crazy? Maybe. Again, its ok to purge.

2. Move mountains, move along, make a wrong move, moved to tears, get a move on, move up, move over, move out of the way, move the deck chairs on the Titanic, move it!...pick one and tell us how it fits your recent circumstances.

All the above. Just keeping it real, folks. We are faced with some real difficult decisions and one of us isn't or doesn't want to budge even knowing what is known about the current sad state of affairs and the lackluster job market due to the virus and the king's daily edicts. One of us is ready to move mountains, move along, moved to daily tears, get a move on it, move out of the way, move the frigging deck chairs already and the other is "make a wrong move" mentality. OH and the 3rd member of the family is like Switzerland. And the 4 legged other family member looks at us like we are crazy.

3. What have you been doing to make yourself move (aka stay fit-active) during these strange times?

Honestly, walking. I prefer it by myself because I am in the Move mountains, move along, moved to tears, get a move on, move up, move over, move out of the way, move the deck chairs on the Titanic, move it! Set of mind. Just keeping it real.

4. This week's calendar includes celebrations for the following foods-

National Coffee Milkshake Day (Sunday), National Creme Brûlée Day (Monday), National Milk Chocolate Day (Tuesday), National Chicken Wing Day (Wednesday), National Lasagne Day (Wednesday), National Cheesecake Day (Thursday), and National Avocado Day (Friday)

Which one on the list would you be most inclined to celebrate? Which would you be most inclined to skip?

Ick on the National Avocado Day, nasty, nasty, nasty. LOL

and

according to our King  Governor here, chicken wings isn't a meal. But, I say it is. So there.

5. Next week's Hodgepodge lands in August! I know!! Raise your hand if you feel like July flew by in the blink of an eye? Now bid farewell to your July acrostic style. If you don't know what that means click here.

Just as fireworks flew

Under the star spangled banners they fly

Lazy never ending summer and lollipop days

Yonder on over by the river to watch the Independence Day fireworks.

6.  Insert your own random thought here.



So, anyone catch the real fireworks on tv yesterday? Bill Barr vs. the establishment? Yikes. Shameful behavior from the democrats, but then again, you already know that and they do too.

Tuesday, July 28, 2020

Tuesday 4 Meme

Joining in with the Tuesday Meme. Thanks Ann for keeping up with this meme, smiles.


What kind of restaurants do you enjoy and why? Do you have a favorite?

Well, we have been shut down since late February and we haven't been to any. We are still at 25% capacity, limited indoor dining, masks are required etc. , STILL. I rather enjoy Italian; Giovanni's (across the street and they deliver for free), Little Italy, Italian Villa. All authentic Italian food.

Do you have a favorite cartoon from a film, news or comic book?

I like Who  Framed Roger Rabbit


and that rascally Calvin and Hobbes


Do you belong to any clubs, societies organizations? Can you tell us about them?

I belong to the Historical Society and we preserve everything Historical.

The internet is filled with ads. Are you there any ads that you enjoy? Any that you don't?



Ha! I love Daniel Craig, and he is my second husband, only, he doesn't know it {{{{LOLOLOL}}}}. Hilarious commercial from the Super Bowl.

Monday, July 27, 2020

Monday Musings

Linking back to Stacy. Its time for the Monday Musings.


Currently in Hornell...

Weather...67*. We are under a heat advisory for today.

On Tap...we are heading over to Hinsdale today, My son starts his Census Job on Thursday. Haven't a clue on where Hinsdale is, well, I sort of do. It's Amish country and now I/we know why they placed him there. Just want to get familiarized. He was suppose to be here, local...but I guess they had something else in mind.

Reading...nothing right now. OH the book I was referring too yesterday is


Celebrating...nothing really. Glad to know the government thinks the Census is important and let's get back to somewhat normal.

Feeling...tired. This heat wave has lasted for months now.

In the garden...plenty of tomatoes and peppers and cuks.

Over...

I am so sick of the hate, the virus, the mask mandates, sick of Nancy Pelosi, sick of AOC, sick of crying Chuck Schumer, sick of the liberal disease etc. I am so over it. 

In the kitchen...I made  a big pan of baked Ziti last night. We'll eat off that.

Making me laugh...



yeah, never mind...dry humor.

Have a great day all.

Sunday, July 26, 2020

Sunday Stealing-Books

Today's Sunday Stealing is bought to you by the letter B for Books. {{grin}}

1.  Why did you pick the book?

It looked interesting.

2.  What did you think about the book?

Very well researched, very well told, brilliant.

3.  What do you know about the author?

He received an BA from Brown in English, and MA in American Literature from Duke and he is from Boston. Although he is not an educated historian, he is well researched when writing his books. I often had to stop reading and check his footnotes, which is something historians are trained to do ((footnotes, footnotes, footnotes, notes, notes, notes)).

4.  What’s the most memorable scene?

"Unlike Benedict Arnold, Joseph Plumb Martin had long since resigned himself to the necessity of fulfilling his obligations to his country even though "she failed in fulfilling hers with me." In the end, Martin decided, "The case was much like that of a loyal and faithful husband and light -heeled wanton of a wife. But I forgive her and hope she will do better in {the} future."

**Martin was a soldier in the Continental Army & Connecticut Militia during the Revolutionary War. He kept well known diaries during this time.

5.  How did the book make you feel?

Proud to be an American and quite concerned about the present events.

6.  How do you feel about the way the story was told?

Excellent. It is always refreshing to read history through a fresh perspective.

7.  Which parts of the book stood out to you?

Discussing WHY and HOW Benedict Arnold became a traitor and the treachery involved.

8.  Which specific parts of the protagonist can you relate to?

Not specifically but the people who wanted to bring Great Britain to their knees and the colonies who wanted to be free from tyranny.

9.  Which character did you relate to the most?

Not that I am dishing my man George. But, probably George Washington, who wasn't much of a soldier (contrary to popular belief, he got lucky on the battlefield), but he loved the idea of not being under tyranny. He wrote in his diaries, 

"Few people have the virtue to withstand the highest bidder. The foundation of our national society will be laid in the pure and immutable principles of private morality, and the preeminence of free government to be exemplified by all the attributes which can win the affections of its citizens and command the respect of the world."

10. Share a line or passage from the book.

"The passage of the Declaration of Independence had forced Americans to make a choice-
either side with the newly created United States or declare their continued loyalty to the British King."

11. What did you think about the ending?

How about I just write it and you can think for yourself.

 Washington had no illusions abut Benedict Arnold. Soon after Andre's execution, John Lauren wrote to Washington insisting that the traitor must now be racked by a "mental hell." Washington disagreed. The intensity of Arnold's self absorption meant that he was incapable of regret, or as Washington wrote in response to Laurens," He wants feeling!... While his faculties will enable him to continue his sordid pursuits, there will be no time for remorse." It had been revealed to him dangerously late, but Washington now knew his man. 

P.S. Whatever happened to Benedict Arnold? Why he escaped to London and than later too Canada and fought in the French Revolutionary War in 1792 was he was held for spying for Great Britain on the island of Guadeloupe and was narrowly hung for treason. He lived out his remaining years in now Ontario. He died of delirium bought on by gout an dropsy.

12. Is the story plot driven or character driven?

Both

13. If the book was made into a movie, what changes or decisions would you hope for?

Actually, it was made into a TV show, "Turn; Washington's Spies"-it was an excellent show.

14. How did the book change you?

Change me? It caused me to realize there is a faction in what is going on today how there is a underbelly of traitor/treasonous behavior going on. One sees it everyday. From the Speaker of the House running her mouth to the riots going on. 


Yep, I went there.

Saturday, July 25, 2020

Love Boat Saturday 9

Welcome to the last Saturday in July. Where has the month gone?


Saturday 9: The Love Boat (1977)
 
Unfamiliar with this week's tune? Hear it here.

1) The Love Boat ran from 1977 to 1987. It was in the Top 10 for seven of those 10 seasons. Are you familiar with the show? Were you a fan?

Yes and yes. I liked the show. 

2) Every week, viewers followed The Pacific Princess as she set sail to a glamorous destination. Have you ever taken a cruise? If so, where did you go? 

Yes. Bahamas. 

3) Gavin MacLeod played Captain Steubing. Born Allan See, he came up with the stage name by combining the first name of a fictional character he admired, and the last name of a teacher who influenced him. Using his formula, give yourself a stage name. For example, Sam would be Hermione Hart (Hermione from Harry Potter; Hart for her Kindergarten teacher).

Oh, I've given much thought to this...Lucinda Bea. Nope, not going to tell you why.

4) After the series ended, Fred Grandy (aka "Gopher") went on to become a Congressman from Iowa and then CEO of Goodwill Industries. If you had a bag of gently-used items to donate, where would you take them?

Goodwill or Salvation Army
 
5) Ted Lange is best known for his role as the ship's bartender, Isaac. But he began his career performing the classics, and appeared at Colorado Shakespearean Festival and London's Royal Academy of Dramatic Art. Let's class up this joint. Give us a little Shakespeare.  

The lady doth protest too much, methinks.

6) Bernie Kopell played the ship's doctor, Adam Bricker. Kopell first appeared on TV in 1961 and was a regular on Get Smart and That Girl, and he's still acting today. But Love Boat was, by far, his favorite role. Working on the show was "absolute heaven" because he was paid to travel the world and meet his acting idols, like Oscar winners Greer Garson, Joan Fontaine and Eva Marie Saint, who appeared on the show. When you think of the best job you have ever had, what made it so good: the pay, the location, the people you met, or the work itself?

The best job I ever had? Homeschooling and being a wife/mom

7) Lauren Tewes played Cruise Director Julie McCoy. Today she lives in Seattle, appearing in local theater and -- between acting assignments -- working as a chef for a catering service. Have you hosted dinner for more than 8 people? If yes, do you remember what you served?

Yes, the traditional Thanksgiving meal.

8) For the first nine seasons, the theme was sung by Jack Jones. The Grammy-winning singer says one of his career highlights playing Sky Masterson onstage in Guys and Dolls. In his late 50s at the time, had had to go outside his comfort zone, dancing and acting as well as singing before a live audience. Tell us about something new you tried recently.

Sending out resumes to strangers

9) Random question  -- Which would you rather receive as a gift: one $500 wristwatch, or five $100 wristwatches?

Neither, I don't wear a watch. I'll just take the money please. grin

Friday, July 24, 2020

Another Useless Idot...

Oh, another useless fraud/idot. And yes, I called him out and will continue to do so. The mask mandates are fraudulent-the greatest hoax perpetrated on the American People. Useless idot, right out of the Communist playbook. 


Oh, caught you not social distancing either. Great going. The so called leaders and heath care officials and Fortune 400-500 companies "Do as we say!" Huh huh, nope.

Hypocrisy at it's best...

Oh, my...masks and rules/Executive Orders are for us little people. King Cuomo in Savannah, Ga the other day. Also, since GA is on the visitation ban and must quarantine, I wonder...has the King quarantined? That is a rhetorical question.


Because he gave a press conference;




ok, you get the point.


You can read all about it. The more decrees you do, King, the more the people will call you out and not do it. But then again, you are all about crippling people and the businesses. This isn't about keeping people safe, no this is about dictatorship and control. Plain and simple. Just my opinion, your coat of many colors is showing King Drinktator Cuomo.

Thursday, July 23, 2020

Karen's, Social Media, Cancel Culture

Usually Thursday's are reserved for Thankful Thursday's. I decided to talk about some serious things that we all know about, but most prefer to ignore or stick our heads in the sand, until it happens to you and then you decide to stand up. A long post, but an important one--- this is a harsh post.

***FAIR WARNING**


1. Karen's. Let's have a chat about these useless folks of society. I dont know why I always get the Karen's of the world. No use in explaining what a Karen is, I am sure most of us know what that is. Please excuse the language. But this is so funny because it is so true.


We were at Wegmans the other day. My husband and I separated to tackle our list. While at the deli counter, I reached in and got the items I needed, a man was standing there taking his sweet time. My crime? I reached around him to get the items. He started screaming about social distancing, not wearing a mask etc. Then he proceeds to follow me around the store and yell at me. Then my husband caught on and boy, thought for sure a fist fight would break out. Enough you stupid Karen's. Yeah, I called you stupid. Because you are. By the way, the stores are fully aware of WHY I can't wear a mask. I would never willingly walk into a place without speaking to the person in charge.

2.


Gosh, the cancel culture is so true and real. Just because you don't like what folks have to say or don't agree with them doesn't mean you can ruin their lives. Period. 

I'll go ahead and throw Twitter and Facebook in there.


Been censored, fact checked and banned from FB and Twitter. My crime? Simply speaking the truth. I urge you to listen to this video by Prager U. Right on, Dennis. It takes a lot of courage to stand up for what is right. Gosh forbid you call out the lies, and the lies are coming from the left. Period. Karen.


Let's discuss religious symbols shall we? The Star of David is among those that Social Media has decided that "doesn't conform to their community standards." Oh, Twitter 12 hrs ago has decided that now it does, so they will restore those accounts. They haven't. 


Oh, let's talk about Qnon and the phenomenon aka conspiracy of that movement. Social Media has scrubbed everything relating to Q and Qnon's. I have to ask, the truth was spoken, so what are you afraid of Social Media? Oh, yes, the truth, the truth can not and must not be spoken. Period. 


Good question. Because those who speak the truth know it to be true. So, they risk everything in order to get the truth out and I do mean EVERYTHING. Social media is a powerful tool that also must be used for the goodness and not just for the canceling of everything. I had someone tell me yesterday that social media is not the vessel that God uses to get his message out. Oh really? God sure sent his son into the temple to overthrow those tax folks, God sure used his Son to preach to the Prostitutes, and so on.  I'll leave you with this thought; You really think "canceling a person" or censoring a thought is a good thing? If you do, you might want to check yourself.

p.s. I think those on the left side of politics have really overplayed their hand now. The folks are onto to you. 

Wednesday, July 22, 2020

Thank You Hodge Twins

I'll let their words speak for me. Stay tuned for tomorrows post about the Karen's of the world, Twitter's banning of the Star of David and Facebook's banning and censorship of regular folks, like me.


Way past time to stand up and quit sticking heads in the stand. The good Lord does not want compliancy, of course, I will be fried for saying this.

Tuesday, July 21, 2020

Tuesday 4...

Thank you all for the kind comments yesterday, so the consensus is clear; fed up is the word. smiles


Time for the Tuesday 4. Today's theme is Music.

1. Do you play a musical instrument?

Nope 

2. Have you taken music lessons? What kind. If not, is there one you might enjoy learning. It is never too late to start.

I took flute. No good at it. I would love to learn how to play the cello, violin or even the pipe organ.

3. Is there music in your home as background to your day's activities or do you have music playing in your car, etc.? If so, what kind of music do you enjoy hearing?

Sometimes...usually the tv is on and then I will have to put in my ear buds. I enjoy rock, Christian, classical. In the car it is set to Met 95, its a 80-s-90's music rock. 

4.  Do you have a favorite composer or genre of music that you like most? Maybe you like several. Please share with us your thoughts?

I really enjoy this music and play it often (I have Tchaikovsky on CD):

1812 Overture


and

Toccata and Fugue


Sure would love to buy a castle and play this all day. bahwaaaaaaaaaa

and


In the Hall of the Mountain King

and lastly...


Pachelbel Canon

Monday, July 20, 2020

Monday Musings...Edicts, Edicts, Edicts

Good morning from a sweltering north. We did have an awesome storm that went through late yesterday and it only made it more humid.


Let's see what our Governor has been up to here since July 17:

-King Cuomo says No food, No Alcohol, in restaurants and bars. All restaurants and bars statewide will be subjected to new requirements that they must only serve alcohol to people who are ordering and eating food and that all service at bar tops must only be seated for people who are socially distancing by 6 feet and or separated by physical barriers. Only establishments that serve food are permitted to serve alcoholic beverages.

--King Cuomo says Businesses must deny entry to people who do not wear masks.

---Three strikes and your out! If a business is caught disobeying the edicts, they will be shut down. Period. Without a proper hearing.


Yeah, no...I think its safe to say, majority of folks have had enough. All in the name of "I'm keeping you safe." I don't think folks are buying it anymore. Especially when his nursing home policy killed nearly 30,000 and the state is fudging the data to cover the king.


Have a great day all.

Sunday, July 19, 2020

Parent Update and Sunday Salon

Good Morning from a sticky north. We are under a heat advisory today. A real quick thought about my folks; the test results came back positive for Covid. Both are quarantined and will remain so. Both were put on Remdesivir and are responding well to that. My dad is more ill than my mom due to the fact he has an underlying medical condition; Hepatitis which he contacted while in 'Nam. Both have to return to the dr. tomorrow, Florida doesn't test twice like NY does, I'll leave it at that. My uncle has it worse and will more than likely be put in the hospital. Both my dad and uncle played golf last weekend, and I will leave it at that-both did not know they were sick, oh they weren't feeling well but contributed to the heat.


Time: 8:30 am

Scene: 75*, dewpoint is 65, humidity is 67%, barometer is rising 29.93. Under heat advisory suppose to be 100 today.

Drinking: second cup of Canandaigua coffee with Italian Sweet Cream

Plans for today: Not much. Stay indoors. Will probably grill the pork chops and potatoes outside.

Pondering: The job market/the future (are you tired of hearing that?)




Saturday, July 18, 2020

Saturday 9

Joining in with the Saturday 9.


Saturday 9: Flipper (1964)
 
Unfamiliar with this week's tune? Hear it here.

1) Flipper ran for three seasons, from 1964 to 1967. Are you familiar with the show? Were you a fan?

Yes... but only in reruns. I was born in 1967

2) Brothers Sandy and Bud consider a bottle-nosed dolphin, named Flipper, their pet. Do you currently share your home with any animals?

Yes, Coffee, who is a German Shepherd

3) Bud and Sandy's dad was Chief Warden Porter Ricks of the fictional Coral Key Marine Preserve. In reality, the show was filmed in Miami and Key Biscayne. When were you last in the ocean? Which ocean was it?

Hmm...like 8-9 years ago, not a ocean, but Gulf Shores, Alabama

4) There was no one single "Flipper." In close-ups, the role was played by a dolphin named Susie. While Susie was good at interacting with people, she had trouble with stunts, and sometimes a male dolphin named Clown was brought in for action sequences. Do you consider yourself more social, like Susie? Or are you more athletic, like Clown?

Probably more social.

5) Without looking it up, do you know the difference between a dolphin and a porpoise?

yes. Their noses and mouths.

6) Flipper wasn't just a TV pet. He was an industry! During the show's run, Flipper comic books, coloring books and puzzles were very popular. As an adult, do you entertain yourself by reading comics, coloring, or completing jigsaw puzzles?

Yes to all the above.

7) The Flipper lunchbox was also a big seller. It came with a Thermos topped with a red cup. Do you own a Thermos?

Yep, several. 
 
8) In 1964, when Flipper premiered, it was up against The Outer Limits and The Jackie Gleason Show. If those were your only viewing choices, would you watch the family show about the dolphin, the sci-fi anthology show, or the comedy-variety show? (Or would you rather flip through a magazine?)

I liked Jackie Gleason...so I would flip back and forth between Jackie and Flipper.

9) Random question  -- Which would you be more comfortable explaining: how a car engine works, the current IRS tax brackets, or the rules of baseball?

I can explain all three if you like and have explained all three. I was the only girl/daughter growing up and still am the only girl in the house. All the men in my life know cars, rules of sports and unfort. IRS tax brackets.



Friday, July 17, 2020

Just Some Friday Funnies

I think we all need some humor...and I am not immune from telling it...although it/my dry humor often falls flat.



Below is very true. Read it here Harvard and Health notice the dates. There are also other numerous postings.


oh yeah, go ahead and ask me about giving up the ac units; we have 5 of them as there is no such thing as homes having central ac here in NY (it's rare). That would be a def NO! ...and lastly...


Oh!!! Thankfully I am all good!!!! Since I partake in a nip or two. 



P.S. In all seriousness,  I wasn't ok spring of 2019 and now the dr. states "Oh, we think its been here for a while now." Oh  great, I almost died last spring with "something" you have no idea about. That goes to show you, folks, the so called experts really don't know, so stop the farce. ENOUGH...

Thursday, July 16, 2020

Just a funny...

Man- a alot has happened since January. I'm voting Aliens for Nov. At this point, who really cares. 😳

Dear Diary 2020 Edition,

In ❄️ January, 🔥 Australia caught on fire. I don’t even know if that fire was put out, because we straight up almost went to war with Iran 🇮🇷 . We might actually still be almost at war with them 🤔. I don’t know, because 👩 Jen Aniston and 👨🏻 Brad Pitt spoke to one another at an awards 🏆 show and everyone flipped the crap out 😲, but then there was this thing happening in 🦇 🇨🇳 China, then 👑 Prince Harry and Megan ✌🏼 peaced out of the Royal family, and there was the whole impeachment trial 👩‍⚖️ , and then corona virus 🦠 showed up in the US ✔️“officially,” but then 🏀 Kobe died 😭and UK 🇬🇧 peaced out of the European Union.

In February, 🌽 Iowa crapped 💩 itself with the caucus results and the president was acquitted and the 👩🏼‍💼Speaker of the House took ten. Whole. years. to rip up a speech , but then The👨‍🔬 🌎WHO decided to give this virus a name COVID-19, which confused 🤔some really important people 👔 in charge of, like, our lives, into thinking there were 18 other versions before it, but then Harvey Weinstein was found guilty👨🏻‍⚖️, and 🇺🇸 Americans started asking if Corona beer 🍺 was safe to drink🤦🏻‍♀️, and everyone on Facebook became a doctor 👨‍⚕️ who just knew the 🤒flu like killed way more people than COVID 1 through 18.

In March, stuff hit the fan👿. Warren dropped out of the presidential race and Sanders was like Bernie or bust 💥, but then Italy 🇮🇹 shut its whole country down 🚷, and then COVID Not 1 through 18 officially become what everyone already realized, a 😱pandemic and then a nationwide state of emergency 🆘was declared in US 🇺🇸 , but it didn’t really change anything, so everyone was confused or thought it was still just a flu 💁🏻‍♀️, but then COVID Not 18 was like y'all not taking me seriously? 💡 I’m gonna infect the one celebrity everyone loves and totally infected Tom Hanks👨🏻, get y’all to close all of the schools so y’all can 🙏🏼 appreciate teachers 👩‍🏫 for once (because you can’t teach them anything other than how to use a touch screen🤦🏻‍♀️ ) close down all of salons so you can’t get your 💇‍♂️ hair or your nails done💅 , everyone had to work from home and attend Zoom meetings in their underwear. The 📉 DOW took a crap 💩 on itself, and most of us still don’t understand why the stock market is so important or even a thing 🤔 (I still don’t), We were then all introduced to 🐅 Tiger King and the ONE thing we can all agree on this year , 👍🏼Carol totally killed her husband⚰️ ..... whacked him! And then Netflix was like you’re welcome, and we all realized there was no way we were washing our hands enough in the first place because all of our hands are now dry and gross and were all searching for lotion now.

In 🌧 April, Bernie finally busted✌🏼 himself out of the presidential race 🏃 , but then NYC 🗽became the set of The Walking Dead 💀 and we learned that no one has face masks 😷, ventilators, or toilet paper, or THE FREAKING SWIFFER WET JET LIQUID , and by now our 🦁outgrowth is showing, so there’s a shortage on 📦 box hair dye and all of our hair dressers are like , 😱 NO DONT DO IT!!! But, then Kim Jong-Un died, but then he came back to life … or did he? Who knows, because then the Pentagon released 🎥 videos of UFOs and nobody cared, and we were like man, it’s only April….

In 💐 May, the biblical end times kicked off , historical locust swarms, we learned of murder hornets 🐝 and realized that 2020 was the start of the Hunger Games🙈 however people forgot to let us know. people legit started to protest lockdown measures with 🔫 AR-15s, 🏀⚾️sports events were cancelled everywhere. But then people all over America finally reached a breaking point with race issues and violence. There were 🗣protests in every city🌃 ,which was confusing to some of us because people were definitely gathering in 👫crowds of more than 🖐🏼🤚🏼10 and for sure closer than 6 foot away ⬅️➡️from each other . Those people must have forgotten about the 😖pandemic called COVID Not One Through 18. Media 📺 🗞 struggled with how to 🤬focus on two important things at once, people in general struggle to focus on more than one important thing. A dead whale 🐋 was found in the middle of the Amazon rain forest 🌳 after monkeys 🐒 stole COVID 1 Through 19 from a lab 🔬 and ran off with them, and either in May or April (no one is keeping track of time now) that a giant asteroid ☄️ narrowly missed the Earth🌍.

In ☀️ June, common sense just got thrown 🤾🏼 straight out the window and somehow 😷 wearing masks became a 🏛political thing, but then everyone sort of remembered there was a pandemic, then 👨‍🔬scientists announced they found a mysterious undiscovered mass at the center of the earth, and everyone was like 🙅🏽‍♂️🙅🏻‍♀️🚧DON’T YOU DARE TOUCH IT, but then everyone took a pause to realize that people actually believed Gone With The Wind 💨 was like non-fiction, but then it was also announced that there is a strange 🛰radio signal coming from somewhere in the universe 🌌 that repeats itself every so many days 🗓 , and everyone was like 👽 DON’T YOU DARE ATTEMPT TO COMMUNICATE WITH IT‼️🚫 but then America reopened 🙌🏼from the shut down that actually wasn’t even a shut down, and so far, things have gone spectacularly .... not that great 👎🏼. All of the Karen’s came out at once, and people started tearing down 🔨 statues. Everyone is on Facebook arguing 🤼‍♀️ about masks 👃🏼, but then Florida 🏖 was like hold my beer 🍺 and let me show you how we’re number one 🥇 in all things, including new Not Corona Beer Coronavirus. Then we learned there was a massive dust cloud ☁️ coming straight at us 📍from the Sahara Desert 🐫 , which is totally normal, but this is 2020, so the 👻 ghost mummy thing is most likely in that dust cloud. We then 📚 learned of meth-gators 🐊 , and I'm like that is so not on my flipping 2020 Bingo card 😡 can we use it as the free space?? 🤷🏻 Then we learned that the Congo's worst ever Ebola 🚨 outbreak is over 😓, and we were all like, there was an Ebola outbreak that was the worse ever? 👀 ....... and don’t forget we just discovered FLYING SNAKES! 🐍, seriously! FLYING SNAKES!!!! And the 200,000 duck 🦆 army that China 🇨🇳 is sending to Pakistan to help with the locusts!

So here comes July…. at this point we are over it , just tell us what’s next .... 👽 Aliens? 🔱Zeus? ☄️ Asteroids? Artificial Intelligence becomes self aware? Can it just be something cool 😎 or fun for once? Maybe even a good laugh , like hahaha 😂 April Fools! We all actually wouldn’t mind that joke at this point.

Also, why didn't I know about the whale in the Amazon? Or a few other things because I just can’t keep up anymore!

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