The thing is, your head has to be in the right place. You have to do it for the right reasons. I've tried to lose weight for ever, I've joined gyms, Weight Watchers, Slimming World, I've done the 5:2 diet, had personal training sessions, taken laxatives and diuretics (scary stuff). I've tried to be teetotal, I've spent my entire life (since the age of 14) on one diet or another. My aim was always to lose weight. Even though my weight itself has never actually bothered me, it bothered other people and I thought that was enough. It wasn't.
The turning point for me came when I was on holiday last September and had walked down a hill from our villa in Tenerife. It was hot, it's a big hill and the entire way down I was panicking about how I was going to get back up. I genuinely thought I might collapse if I even attempted it.
I made an excuse to make sure we got a taxi because the thought of walking up a hill in the heat, terrified me. It was a huge wake up call and finally I was choosing to exercise for the right reasons - my health.
So that brings me to the present day. I am very much enjoying how much better I feel and the lack of general aches and pains I used to feel before I had any strength at all. My back was always painful, my knees would hurt, I couldn't sleep. I am by no means fit now, but I am a hell of a lot fitter than I was.
So yesterday, having done Spinning, Yoga and Insanity already this week, I was off to a weights class at the gym. I popped into Waitrose beforehand to pick up some salad for dinner. Whilst I was standing in the queue, a woman tapped me on the shoulder and asked me where I got the confidence from to dress so brightly at the gym... the way she said it made me assume that she meant for someone of my size. It was like she was genuinely offended that I dared to stand there in my tight sports kit and not give two f*cks.
Initially I was taken aback, but then I realised, it's just not something that even registers with me, how other people may see me, I've been fat/big for most of my adult life, it's pretty much all I know.
I wear what I feel comfortable in, sometimes it's all black, sometimes it's dayglo pink... I hadn't really considered the fact that people may judge this fat lass in the brightly patterned leggings and orange trainers. I am doing something that makes me feel good in clothes I feel comfortable in.
Ultimately, what I am trying to say is that it's of no ones concern how you dress or what you do, just love yourself a little bit. Don't think about how far you have to go or give yourself a hard time for every little failure. Love yourself for how far you have come or for every good choice that you make. Love the body that you have for what it allows you to do. And if you want to wear dayglo pink tops and garish leggings while you love yourself, then good for you!
Initially I was taken aback, but then I realised, it's just not something that even registers with me, how other people may see me, I've been fat/big for most of my adult life, it's pretty much all I know.
I wear what I feel comfortable in, sometimes it's all black, sometimes it's dayglo pink... I hadn't really considered the fact that people may judge this fat lass in the brightly patterned leggings and orange trainers. I am doing something that makes me feel good in clothes I feel comfortable in.
Ultimately, what I am trying to say is that it's of no ones concern how you dress or what you do, just love yourself a little bit. Don't think about how far you have to go or give yourself a hard time for every little failure. Love yourself for how far you have come or for every good choice that you make. Love the body that you have for what it allows you to do. And if you want to wear dayglo pink tops and garish leggings while you love yourself, then good for you!