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Showing posts with label Goals. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Goals. Show all posts

Thursday, July 18, 2019

A Love Lost!


We have no regrets in life, just lessons learned.

We had some good times, but as much as we hated to admit it .. we needed to end our relationship. We tried to make things work, but it just wasn’t meant to be. We were still holding love in our hearts, but we needed to do what was best for us. Sometimes love isn’t enough. We had to end it.

We had to sell our piece of paradise in Puerto Rico!

A lot has happened since our last post, when we bought our piece of paradise. Instead of dragging things out over a series of posts, I'm gonna try and catch up with ya'll pretty quick. We worked our butts off on the home’s exterior, including a new concrete topping on our roof (we hired folks for this) ...



then sealing & painting our new concrete roof ourselves ... what a view!


We scraped off layers of paint from our concrete home for days, skimmed the scraped areas to make the concrete walls smooth again for days, sanded & painted the bars for days, and brightened up our house with a happy yellow & aqua paint. All of this took a lot more time than expected!



So much better!



 After over 3 months of renovating our house we found ourselves only half-way through with repairs, yet maxed out on our time & money budget. As it turned out, concrete isn't as "easy" as we thought ... nothing like our wood-framed houses back home! Salt air and concrete in older homes don't mix too well. We had a ton of unexpected repairs .. including the roof and ceiling inside. Since concrete repairs were new to us, we didn't want to tackle the roof & ceiling repairs ourselves. We had difficulty hiring professionals due to our inability to speak Spanish, and “island time” was killing us. We couldn't start renovating the interior until the ceilings and roof were complete. When the repairs were finally done, it had cost us a lot of extra time and money.

During this time we met some great folks that we now call friends, and got to know the island of Puerto Rico in a way that can’t be done as tourists. We became part of the neighborhood of Luquillo ... a neighborhood we loved!

We had dreams of fixing up the interior of our house & sharing our love of Puerto Rico with friends & family when not renting it out. However, sometimes dreams don’t work out as planned. Knowing when to walk away can be difficult, but it’s sometimes necessary.

We had things in Louisiana waiting for us .. rentals, family,  a growing lil grandson, and our sailboat that was just waiting to finally be sailed somewhere after years of hard work on her. We had to make a decision to either keep dumping money (which was limited) and time into our Puerto Rican home or cut our losses and follow through with our original dream of sailing & traveling. Either way, we knew we needed a break from sleeping on an air mattress while living in a construction zone with no hot water, a/c, kitchen or furniture. Here was our living situation ... an old door covered with a shower curtain created our kitchen, and an air mattress w/fridge.



We decided to list our house with an agent & fly back home the following week for a break. If the house didn’t sell in a few months, we’d have to put off sailing this Winter, finish the house and rent it out as planned. If it sold, then our decision would be made. As it turned out, we had an accepted offer before we left town! We didn't make a profit on the house, but the offer was something we could live with.

We dreaded telling our new neighbors that we were already selling. We felt like we were betraying them! We hugged, shed a few tears, and promised to keep in touch. We’ve got several places to stay whenever we visit Puerto Rico!

We arrived in Louisiana just in time to spend a week with our daughter, grandson, son-in-law, and his family for 4th of July in Destin, Florida. Our kids were moving to Wyoming the following week! This was also a factor in returning home when we did. We cherished every minute with them.





Since arriving home from Destin, FL we got our boat back in order (including a much needed a/c), spent time helping our daughter have a garage sale & get on the road with her lil family, then were hunkered down a few days with crappy weather from storm "Barry" (all went well). 


Just like that ... our Puerto Rican dream had ended, we were back on our sailboat, and our daughter had moved away. It’s all so surreal, and everything happened so fast!

While we hated to break-up with Puerto Rico, we think it’s for the best. We now have our investment back in the bank, which gives us more options in the future. With our daughter moving away, we’d rather fly to see her than fly to Puerto Rico. It’s strange how our perspective & dreams can change so quickly! Life is full of changes, and we do our best to roll with them.

Our dream of owning a piece of paradise in Puerto Rico didn’t end as planned, but we have no regrets. The people we met, the experiences we had, and the memories we made were priceless. I plan on writing a few posts in the future to share some of our memories with you, and what we loved about Puerto Rico.

Currently we're dealing with a nasty "algea bloom" in our lake and having difficulty finding a diver to clean our boat's prop and bottom. Nobody wants to dive in the nasty water .. can't say I blame them. We're sure the prop is covered in barnacles, which makes motoring difficult. We're anxious to start sailing, but once again we're waiting .. are we still on island time?! In the meantime, we’ll be working a little to make some extra money, getting our boat ready to travel in a few months, and helping our daughter sell her house & move her stuff to her new place (road trip soon)!

Life's an adventure when you leave your comfort zone! It may not always go as planned, but it's much better than the monotony of a "routine" existence.

  Hasta luego ... until then. Mid-Life Cruising!
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Posted by Ken n Cheryl at 7:00:00 AM 3 comments
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Monday, December 3, 2018

Struggling to Reach the Dream - An Honest Post


Sometimes we have to look at this quote to remind us not to give up. As anxiety creeps in, we get impatient and the "what-if's" take over. It's easier to be a pessimist than an optimist! But, that's why I'm writing this post. I'm keeping it real, and hoping to inspire others to hang in there with whatever dreams they have. The struggle is real, and you're not alone!

Ken & I have been working on "living the dream" for nine years now (see our refit photo album here .. and that doesn't cover earlier years!), and I'm not gonna lie .. sometimes it's really tough! For starters, we thought we'd be cruising within 3 years of purchasing Nirvana, which would have meant "sailing away" the end of November, 2012. We're about six years behind schedule!

Anyway, we continue to miss our deadlines ... the latest one being this month. We had hoped to have enough done on Nirvana to head towards Florida this month, but after an unintended inspection of our standing rigging we were told it really should be replaced before entering the Gulf. We believe the rigging is original (1987), and it did show signs of damage & age so we reluctantly agreed.

The standing rigging was completed about two weeks ago, except for the forestay. The wire has been ordered and the roller furler will soon be disassembled and removed for the new forestay installation. While we hated to miss our deadline, our safety (and peace of mind) is more important. It is somewhat of a relief to now have new standing rigging. After all, it does hold the mast up!


It seems Nirvana has had everything replaced .. except the engine, rudder and a few other things. Wait, what if after all the recent repairs our engine goes out .. or what if we run aground and have to get a new rudder?! You see what I mean? The anxiety creeps in.

It wasn't just the rigging that held us back, but our barely used Tohatsu has started acting up. Ken has spent four days cleaning, draining and replacing parts with no success .. talk about a downer! He finally decided to take a break from that project for a bit. 

We're also in the process of installing our new Raymarine EV100 autopilot, as well as connecting our Lowrance GPS to our new Lowrance VHF with AIS. This means running a bunch of wires down the cockpit pedestal and into other hard-to-reach places, which also meant a few modifications along the way. The wires have been run down the cockpit pedestal and the four components of the auto-pilot have been mounted, so we're getting close. We just need to run the rest of the wires inside of Nirvana and to the components. 

Oh, and here's a little tip .. grill covers are on sale this time of year, and they make great pedestal covers. We got this "kettle grill" cover for $10 bucks! If fits great, and gathers at the bottom. Now our new GPS & autopilot will be protected, as well as our compass.


All of this will be worth it, as the VHF/AIS allows us to see other boats with AIS and we can contact them (via VHF) if it's on a collision course with us .. or just get outta the way! Other boats won't be able to see us, but that's because we chose the less expensive AIS option. Need I say anything about the auto-pilot? Once we get it going, it will be well worth the investment. Who wants to stand at the helm for hours on end?!

With the current state of things, we weren't ready to "just go". We definitely want our rigging complete, and the comfortable weather of November that we'd been looking forward to didn't come. November in Louisiana is usually in the mid-70's .. perfect for finishing our projects and starting our sailing adventure, but Winter (and rain) arrived instead. We also found ourselves with a vacant rental this month, and we spent a fair amount of time making repairs and finding a new tenant. We finished repairs this past Friday, a new tenant moved in this past weekend .. and we have another vacant rental as of today! More repairs & interviews in December. Ugh!

So anyway, things have been a bit of a bummer for the past month. The weather pretty much sucked, our projects aren't finished, and we're still at the dock. Once we finally admitted to each other that we weren't gonna make our goal, things were pretty somber. We didn't wanna spend another Winter on the boat. We hated last Winter on Nirvana .. the condensation & the cold really sucked! I want to keep this blog as realistic as possible, so I'm not gonna say it's all about the journey. We're ready to sail to some sort of destination after all these years, and we're getting impatient. We wanna start having some fun with Nirvana!

If another person tells us to "just go", I'm gonna scream! I know plenty of folks seem to buy the perfect boat and start cruising a couple of months later, but that's not our reality. We bought a project boat and had no idea what we were doing. We also needed to keep working full-time (until recently) to keep up with the boat expenses .. you know BOAT stands for "Bring Out Another Thousand"!

A reader who meant well told us to "just go" and not worry about having "so much stuff". The thing is, we're not going with all the fancy stuff. We won't have a windlass, a water maker, hot water, radar, or davits. We may leave without solar panels! 

The thing is, we're new to all this sailing & cruising stuff, even though we've been at it for 9 years! We had a lot of projects to make Nirvana safe on the water, and a ton of projects that required hours of research .. everything was new to us and we wanted to do it ourselves. Even with doing everything (except standing rigging) ourselves, the expenses have mounted up.

There have been times we've felt like giving up, moving into one of our rental houses and enjoying the conveniences of mainstream society. A warm shower just steps away, a comfy bed that doesn't require climbing in & out of, no long walks to our car in the cold and/or rain, room to spread out or walk around inside when it's bad weather, a dishwasher .. hot water! But you know what .. we couldn't live with ourselves if we gave up on our dream after so much time and effort. We think the sacrifices will be worth it once we start traveling .. and sailing. Unless something unknown throws us a curve, we're gonna do this! 

It's easy for us to get impatient & depressed, dwelling on the money & time spent and the sacrifices we've made. That's human nature, I think. So, we have our down days but we never forget how lucky we are. We celebrated Thanksgiving with family, and we're looking forward to Christmas with our grandson. It will be his first Christmas, and we're excited about being around at this special time. Our little guy will celebrate his 1st birthday the beginning of February, and we're really glad we won't miss that either. Is he cute or what?!


We spent Thanksgiving in the country .. at my brother & sister-in-law's place in Mississippi. We were lucky to have a break from the crappy weather the days before, and the day after. The weather was perfect! Here's my brother with us, our daughter, son-in-law, grandson, and my mom & step-dad. My dad & step-mom were there too .. wish they were in the photo. My brother and I are thankful that our mom & dad still get along after being divorced since I was an infant. It's nice to spend the holidays with both of them!


Another silver lining ... we're around to repair and rent our properties ourselves instead of hiring someone else to handle it. One more rental to repair, but it should be occupied by the end of the year. We should also complete our auto-pilot & AIS installation, our rigging, and a few other projects (like installing our new Mantus anchor) on Nirvana. I sure hope we get that Tohatsu running! We'll always have projects waiting, but we're focusing on the "must-do's". So, everything always works out as it should.

We've licked our wounds and .. we're escaping to somewhere warm after Christmas! We're headed to a 5-week adventure, and that's what our goals are really about .. making the most out of life. We'll be back on the boat the beginning of February for our grandson's birthday party, then we'll finish up any "must-do's" on Nirvana (shouldn't be much) and leave the dock the end of February/beginning of March. We'll avoid freezing our asses off this January and we'll get to visit a new tropical destination. Yep, things always work out.

When we expose ourselves to so many folks "out there", we sometimes feel vulnerable. We sometimes feel like we need to "just go" this Winter and freeze because ya'll are "watching us" and judging. Not just ya'll, but so many co-workers and friends ask why we're still here. But, I often tell Ken that we're doing what's best for us. Most people who ask what's taking so long don't have a boat and don't have a clue what's involved. We sure didn't! Anyone who judges will be eating their words once we finally do leave. If something tragic happens before then, they'd be cruel to judge us.

If you're reading this and are struggling with turning a dream into reality, know that you're not alone. It may be more difficult than you anticipated, and it may take much longer than anticipated but every baby step forward is progress. As Helen Keller said, a pessimist never "opened a new doorway for the human spirit". Hang in there!

So, we still have our down days but we're looking forward to the holidays with family .. and our getaway after Christmas. More about that later!

Hasta luego .. until then. Mid-Life Cruising!
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Posted by Ken n Cheryl at 7:30:00 AM 4 comments
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Friday, April 22, 2016

Sailor In Progress!


If you've been following our blog for a while, you know that we've been prepping for cruising for ... um, a really long time!  This blog turned 6 years old last month, and I've had to change our " The Plan" page several times since then.  I look back and wonder what we were thinking when we thought we'd be cruising in 2012!

If you're interested enough to read this blog, you're probably interested in the dream of "sailing away".  How many times have you come across dreamers that never actually do anything but talk about it?  There's nothing wrong with hanging on to a dream, but we don't wanna be one of those folks that looks back and realizes we've waited too long.

I posted the picture above on our Facebook page just three days ago, and it's already the most popular picture we've ever posted!  I think a lot of folks can relate to this for more reasons than one.  Not only are there those that dream, but there are lots of folks just like us that are working long and hard towards making their dream a reality.  It's much easier to never leave the dock!

The past six years have had a lot of great milestones that we wouldn't have missed and we've got a lot done on Nirvana.  There's still a lot to do, and we are finally starting to see more time in the near future to make Nirvana our primary focus.

We're still running back and forth to our two vacant rentals ... getting them in shape and interviewing prospective tenants.  Will we ever find good tenants?! We've had a couple of folks cop an attitude when they were turned down, but what they don't understand is that these homes are a result of years of hard work, frugality and discipline. They're our life savings and future retirement ... something that's a pretty big deal to us.  We've already had more than our fair share of "bad" tenants.  Anyway, we're hopeful that we'll find good tenants soon.  Summer is almost here, school will be out, and the market tends to pick up.

We haven't "retired" yet (never really will as long as we have rentals), so it's been tough to find time to keep up with this blog.  I hate it when I can't write!  When not working at our businesses or rentals, we've been working on setting up our long-term future.  We've been working on a project the past several months, and hopefully it will put us where we want to be in twenty years .. when we're 70 years young.

Leaving the dock is hard work when you don't want to be broke in your golden years and you're not wealthy.  We're not quite as care-free as some folks that will "just figure it out".  We're also probably not as young and don't wanna be looking for a full-time income when we're 60-70 years of age. There are no guarantees for our future, but we think we're on the right path for cruising and traveling.  We're "sailors in progress" and we've learned the past few years that making the transition is much more time-consuming and difficult than we thought it would be.  

We love Nirvana, but when we bought her we knew nothing about sailboats .. and had no clue how much work we'd need to put into her.  The good thing is that we've learned a lot over the past few years about our Catalina 30, and we're hopeful that we won't have any major expenses with her once we start cruising ... at least for a little while.

Speaking of "sailor in progress" ... my sailing class has been dampened by the weather.  Our instructor is amazing, but us newbies need ideal weather conditions to sail on the small Flying Scot.  Every time a sailing lesson is scheduled, it's raining or too windy.  To be honest, I'm anxious to start focusing on our own boat anyway!

Ken and I are excited about dedicating much more of our time to Nirvana this Summer, and finally becoming sailors that leave the dock!

Hasta luego ... until then  Mid-Life Cruising!
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Posted by Ken n Cheryl at 7:22:00 AM 6 comments
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Tuesday, March 8, 2016

Let Go .. or Drown!


We were floating down the Tickfaw River on a tube, soaking up the sun while drinking cold beer.  As we floated towards a bunch of fallen trees near the bank, we slowly started paddling away from the bank and the trees.  We've done this many times before ... no big deal.  As Ken and I floated closer to the trees, we started paddling a bit harder and faster.  Before we knew it, our friends floated past us as we found ourselves stuck against the clump of trees in the middle of a strong current.

The relaxing day had changed so quickly ... I was now sitting in my tube, holding on to a tree branch, and fighting the current from sucking me underneath the mass of trees.  As I held on for dear life, an image popped into my head ... a nest of water moccasins!  I don't know why I had to think of something else to scare me, but now I was wanting to get out of this situation fast.  

Thankfully Ken was right next to me ... misery loves company!  I looked at him as if he should have all the answers, but he looked just as dumbfounded as me. We both looked around and analyzed our situation. The only solution was to let go of the tree branch and propel ourselves as quickly as possible to another branch a little further down that wasn't in the middle of the current.  Ken and I discussed our plan, and I told him I was scared to let go.  What if I didn't make it to the other branch and instead got sucked underneath the trees .. right into a nest of snakes?!  I'm not kidding ... this was a really scary situation that I never thought I'd find myself in while tubing the Tickfaw.

Ken said he'd go first so I could watch what he did.  I continued to hold on tight while Ken let go of the branch and quickly made it to safety.  Whew, he survived!  Okay, it was now my turn ... it was my turn!  I didn't wanna let go, so I quietly counted to ten and then let go of the branch.  I barely escaped death (so it seemed to me) and made it safely next to Ken.  We took a few minutes to catch our breath and then caught up with our friends that we were waiting for us.  Hand us a beer!

This tubing incident occurred about 15 years ago, but I've never forgotten it.  For some reason I thought of this day on the Tickfaw recently when thinking about our life lately.  It's kind of a good analogy, as well as the quote above.  Sometimes in life, you've gotta "let go" or you'll find yourself drowning.  That day on the Tickfaw, we had to let go to free ourselves from being sucked under with the current.  At this chapter in our lives, we have to "let go" of the routine & our businesses in order to enjoy freedom.  

I've written about this before, but I think one of the biggest hurdles in turning a dream into a reality is letting go of the comfort zone.  Heck, just like hanging on to that tree branch ... life hasn't been very comfortable anyway.  Ken & I get stressed and sometimes we feel that we're going backwards with the boat. We remind ourselves that our life and our dreams are priceless, and we deserve to "let go".  We both let go of that tree branch, and it's time to let go again.  This time, I'll probably go first.

I saw another quote last week that also rang true ... "Stop worrying about what could go wrong, and start getting excited about what could go right"!

Hasta luego ... until then.  Mid-Life Cruising!
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Posted by Ken n Cheryl at 8:11:00 AM 5 comments
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Friday, September 25, 2015

Should We Quit?!


When things get in the way of your dream, you have to start taking a hard look at what's standing in the way.  A dream worth working towards takes a lot of time, hard work and discipline.  The typical obstacles of cruising are eliminating debt, creating a savings, and generating an income while traveling.  Once those are removed, it's "smooth sailing" right?  Well, not so fast.

We've eliminated the above by selling our house, paying off all debt and generating income from rental properties but we still have a huge obstacle that often stops a large group of folks from actually achieving their dream ... change and the unknown.  I guess I should also include ... embracing the idea of becoming a "slacker".

If you've been following our Facebook page lately, you know that we've been prepping Nirvana for spraying her deck with smooth and non-skid paint.  We've got her as ready as she's gonna get, but the weather has to cooperate.  Low humidity, no rain and low winds are necessary to spray the primer and paint.  For over a week, we've been waiting for the winds to die down a bit.  Since we haven't been able to spray, Ken took a last minute renovation job from a long-time client.  Why not make the money if we can't spray, right?  Well, as luck would have it ... today is perfect for spraying but Ken's gotta finish the job .. and keep his commitment.  By the time he's done, rain is in the forecast.  Looks like another week at best.

All of this juggling of working on the boat and trying to make a living has been extremely stressful.  At what point do we quit our businesses completely?  At what point do we tell ourselves it's okay to be "unemployed" and start dipping into our savings while fixing our boat?

We've come to the part of the dream that's probably the hardest ... quitting work and "taking a chance".  I think that we've come to a crossroads that a lot of people avoid.  It's time to "shit or get off the pot".  It's gettin' real!

Unless you're financially wealthy, turning the dream of early retirement into a reality is scary.  There are so many unknowns ... will we stay healthy, will we have enough money to last throughout our lives, will our boat become a money pit, will our boat sink?!  Will we be viewed as "failures" if things don't work out as planned?  Will we be called "losers" because we quit working before 50 yrs of age? Will we regret throwing away the comfort of our routine?  But, there comes a time when you have to take the plunge into making the dream a reality ... or continue making excuses.

We figure that while there are risks in moving forward with our plan, there are risks of staying behind as well.  We could still lose our good health on land or get in a debilitating accident.  Ken's construction work is very physical, and he can't keep doing it forever.  Bad things can happen no matter how you live, so we may as well live on a boat and travel.  If we have regrets with our plans, at least we won't be living with the regret of never doing it .. and wondering if we should have.  As far as being a "failure" ... we figure the real failure would be in not going for it.  Being "losers" ... how could we be "losers" by retiring early, yet being self-sufficient?  We won't be living off of the government or hand-outs from others (we will accept a donation for a cold one, but that's not how we're supporting ourselves ... we'd starve!).  

The "comfort" of our daily routine isn't so comfortable anymore.  There's a new life chapter awaiting us, and the routine is no longer good enough.  We have more to learn and experience.

So, we're faced with the question .. has the time come?  Should we quit our jobs?  Even more pressing .. should Ken quit his?  As a real estate agent, I can work from home and don't need to be in an office.  There's no real obstacle in me continuing to be available for a seller or a buyer.  Truth be told, it's not that often anyway.  I've lost the passion to build my business, and instead I'm passionate about working on our dream.

It's hard for Ken to turn down work and long-term clients, so the door hasn't been shut completely.  However, we've agreed that he needs to start turning down jobs and choosing the ones that he takes carefully.  Once we're not fighting against timing the weather and paying boatyard fees, it may not be that hard to pick up a job every now and then in between working on Nirvana.  Heck, maybe we'll pick up a few construction jobs while cruising.

I've often read that the hardest part of becoming a cruiser is leaving the dock.  Again, unless you're wealthy ... I'd have to agree.

Here's to working a whole lot less ... at least for money.  Hmmm ... that doesn't sound right and is gonna take some getting used to.  We need to do as the picture above states ... smile, move on, and never look back!  Oh, and to those already cruising ... feel free to remind us of how great it is!  

Hasta luego ... until then.  Mid-Life Cruising!
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Posted by Ken n Cheryl at 11:19:00 AM 10 comments
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Thursday, April 2, 2015

Mid-Life Crisis?!


I haven't had too much to write about lately ... still working and planning!

Nirvana is still patiently waiting for a paint job in the boatyard, and she'll probably be waiting until the end of May before she gets some attention.  The end of May .. that's when we figure our daughter will be settled into her house and Ken's schedule opens up a bit.

In the meantime, I've been gettin' antsy!  I'm fine with waiting until the summer to get Nirvana painted and back in the marina, but after that I'm wanting to move forward .. full force!  Maybe I'm going through a mid-life crisis, but I wanna get going.  I'm not craving a fancy sports car or botox, but I have this strong sense of urgency.  

A few of our friends have passed away, I know way too many people that have battled cancer, and know others that aren't able to travel for one reason or another.  So if I'm lucky enough to keep my health, I have to hope that Ken is also lucky.  If that isn't enough, I have to hope that our parents stay healthy for a while!  I don't like the odds as I get older.  Ken and I will be 50 years (young) next year, so even if we keep in good health and nothing tragic happens, we're past the half-way mark.  Every year goes by faster than the last, and I remember celebrating my mom's 50th birthday .. it seems like it was just a few years ago.  Damn, time flies.

Perhaps I should have named our site "3/4 Life Cruising"!

Hasta luego ... until then.  Mid-Life Cruising!
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Posted by Ken n Cheryl at 7:00:00 AM 4 comments
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Tuesday, March 10, 2015

The Art of Saying No!


As I mentioned in a recent post, learning to sail is probably the easier part of cruising.  It's hard to leave the dock!  As I mentioned in that post, we've had our challenges but we've overcome a lot of them in the past year.  The next hurdle will no doubt also be a challenge ... closing our businesses and saying "No"!

I'm not underestimating the hardship of turning in a resignation to the boss, but closing a business has it's extra set of hardships.  Both Ken and I work in the housing industry, where jobs may not be completed until months down the line.  While I can stop showing properties when the time comes, things are a bit more difficult for Ken.  

The next few months will involve finishing up our daughter's house and getting Nirvana out of the boatyard.  However, the bills still need to be paid so we're not shutting down our businesses just yet.  Therefore, Ken has the difficult task of juggling his business with our goals.  I swear life can be a tease sometimes ... just when you think it's time to switch gears the phone doesn't stop ringing!  It's been difficult to tell a potential client that their construction project will have to wait at least 2 months for Ken.  Although that addition or kitchen remodel is a luxury and a "want" to me, it sure isn't to the people that want it.  You'd think that their lives were at stake when told that they'd have to wait for Ken to start.  

Ken has tried to delicately tell some clients that he is just too busy to do their jobs, but then they say they'll wait until he has time.  Don't they know that we wanna get outta here?!  Actually, they don't.  Other than close friends and family, we don't tell too many people about our plans.  It seems that most folks don't take us seriously ... or think we're nuts.  So, Ken tries to "kill them softly" by saying that he understands if they wanna get another contractor ... if only it were that easy.  They wanna wait, not knowing that at some point we've gotta say "NO"!

I think part of the difficulty of saying "no" is that society raises us to be nice, be generous, be empathetic.  We're raised to believe that "no" is a selfish word.

Then there's the guilt that comes with turning down work.  Again, our society raises us to "work hard" ... only a lazy person would turn down work, right?  

Well, we've learned that society ain't always right!  In fact, if we were to go along with the trend of society, we'd work until the day we died because we'd be in debt up to our ears.  But, we'd sure have a nice car, home and the latest trends in technology ... we're not buying it!  We ARE hard working, kind people.  We're NOT lazy ... we just don't wanna work the rest of our lives.  There's an expiration date, and who knows when that is? 

Yes, we all should be empathetic and self-sustaining individuals,  Yes, we should all have pride in accomplishing something ... but does that something have to be reflected in material items?  Yes, hard work can make a person feel good ... but does it have to be at a job?  How about hard work restoring an old boat?!  Yes, we should be generous ... but does it mean we have to put ourselves last?

Anyway, Ken and I are working on the art of saying "no".  Whether it's to a client or to a birthday party, we've got to start using this word a lot more often in our vocabulary.  To be honest, I'm a little bit better at this already.   For the past few years, I've been saying "no" to Mary Kay parties, Tupperware parties, Pampered Chef parties ... and on and on.  I swear if I didn't say "no" to the invites I'd never be home in the evenings ... and I'd be constantly pulling out my wallet!  I don't do these parties, so I'd also never host one.  There's nothing wrong with them, but I've made a rule to always so "no" to these.   

Family functions can be a bit more difficult.   We truly love our family, and we want to spend time with them.  But, our time is limited and we can't make every kid's birthday party and every holiday gathering.  We choose which get-togethers to attend wisely, and we cherish those memories.

While our plans are pretty solid, our timeline is a bit sketchy.  We'd like to think that after our daughter's house is complete and Nirvana is in the marina we'll have a better idea of our time frame,  We hope that no later than this time next year we'll be wrapping things up, if not already gone.  Until then, Ken plans to take a few jobs for income while tackling the "must do" projects on Nirvana.

It really is hard to train your brain to go against everything you thought was "right".  But, we've learned that putting ourselves first isn't selfish, and it isn't "wrong".   As the male in the family, I think that Ken sometimes worries about our plan not going as predicted and failing us.  I've assured him that I'm all in and I want to do this.  In fact, I'm gonna crazy if we don't!  I have a brain, and I have a dream.  Nobody is twisting my arm and if things don't go as planned, it's not because the male partner "failed" us.  We're a team and we're equals ... again, society has raised us to think differently.

So, sorry if we don't attend your social gathering or we make you pay more by hiring another contractor to do your jobs (did I tell you that I think Ken is way too cheap for his talent?).  As they say ... "Just Say No"!

I'm sure this is a topic that is far too common, but not talked about very much.  We'd love to hear your thoughts.

Hasta luego ... until then.  Mid-Life Cruising!
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Posted by Ken n Cheryl at 2:18:00 PM 1 comments
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Tuesday, February 24, 2015

How Long Does It Take to Leave the Dock?

Photo credit:  Mermaid Musings

I was going to name this post, "How Long Does It Take To Become A Cruiser", but becoming a cruiser takes more than leaving the dock.  After all, I can't imagine that Ken and I will leave the dock for our first passage South and officially label ourselves as "cruisers".  Without much sailing experience, we'll have so much to learn.  But then again ... perhaps I should have gone with that title because leaving the dock is probably one of the hardest parts of becoming a cruiser.

After all, pulling one's self out of the depths of society's "success" to the surface of a cruiser's freedom requires a lot of planning, discipline and patience.  The dream is planted, it grows, we feed it, and we sometimes neglect it.  We never give up, and the dream continues to pull us through.  We slowly cut the anchors that weigh us down ... we get closer to the surface.

Ken and I first got the idea of cruising back in the Summer of 2009, after a vacation in Hawaii.  Before the year's end, we purchased Nirvana and have been working towards making her our home ever since then.  I swear sometimes it seems we've been working towards cruising forever, and sometimes I can't believe we're closing in on six years!

In the beginning, we were naive enough to think that we'd be cruising by now.  What were we thinking?!  We're pretty realistic, logical people so how did we underestimate the time it takes to leave the dock?   For starters, we had no idea how long it would take to sell our house.  We also didn't wanna think about how difficult it would be to pay off all debt, purchase stuff for the boat AND make repairs to the boat ... all while working full-time and avoiding new debt!  Then there's life itself ... stress, illness and even injuries.  Family, friends and a bit of fun are squeezed in to keep our sanity.

I think we all have these similar challenges, but I wondered what the average length of time is from the beginning of the dream until reality.  Were we in the average?

 Of course, there are those folks that don't quite fit in the mix.  There are those that didn't get "bitten by the bug" until they retired (ignorance is bliss, I say).  By the time they came up with the idea, they were already at the stage in their lives to make the transition an easy one.  Then there are those that got the idea early in life before kids, cars and a house.  I don't call them "lucky", as we wouldn't trade the years raising our daughter in our house for anything.  But, cruising before having any responsibilities sure makes things easier.  Finally, there are those that are financially set for one reason or another.  These are the lucky folks that have enough money to get the idea, buy a boat, and sail off in a matter of months.  

Nirvana before leaving the dock .. to the boatyard.

We definitely don't fit in any of the above categories, but we figure that most people don't.  While I sometimes have a pity party and feel like we have more than the average amount of "anchors" to cut loose, I know that most folks have their challenges as well.  So, I figured I'd take a little survey on our "Facebook" page, and ask folks like you to tell me how long the dream took to become reality.  I wanted to hear from those who are already cruising, but also those working towards cruising.

I had a good response, and as I figured ... we're right in the average.  We plan to leave within a year, which will put us just past six years from buying the boat, and about 6.5 years from the time we got bitten by the bug.  Most folks seem to take at least 3 - 6 years, some over a decade.  There was one guy that only took 4 months. but he was the only one that took less than a number in years .. he's a very lucky man.

Anyway, I thought my little survey was interesting and I really appreciate all the great stories and feedback.  If you're like us and still swimming towards the surface, let this be an inspiration and reminder that you're not alone.

Once we break through the surface to "freedom", we will become cruisers.  While we've grown in so many ways since adulthood, I'm sure that we will grow in even more ways than we can imagine.  That's what it's all about, right?

Hasta luego ... until then.  Mid-Life Cruising!
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Posted by Ken n Cheryl at 4:34:00 PM 6 comments
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Friday, January 23, 2015

The Right Moves


In the darkness, I stir from my dreams and my thoughts begin to sneak in.  Like a bully, they force themselves into my slumber and I awake.  Before I know it, my mind is racing with the same thoughts that I've contemplated time and time again.  When I've worn myself down to exhaustion, I begin to flirt with sleep.  My routine thoughts are slowly replaced with things so random and so unreal ... it jolts me to reality once again.  Damn it!  I had almost succumbed to sleep, but recognizing that my arrival at work without any shoes wasn't really happening has me awake again!

Our minds are like computers, always processing our thoughts and experiences.  It seems that since we finally sold our two houses, my mind is constantly calculating our next move.  Selling everything and moving onto a boat to sail away and "live the dream" requires a strategy when you're not financially independent.  At almost 50 years old, Ken and I don't want to sail through our entire life savings while cruising.  It wouldn't be hard to do.

While I lay in bed, I constantly run the numbers.  Okay let's go through this again ... we'll budget $1500 per month, which will mostly come from rental income.  We'll have a small amount of savings for rental repairs and those times when our rental is vacant (we have a vacant rental as I write this, and working on repairs).  We'll use a portion of the money from the house sales to get our sailboat ready for cruising (solar panels, generator, ground tackle, etc.).  How much will that cost?!  Is our budget realistic?  The remainder of the house money ... we can't touch it!  That money has to be around for later years.  Is that possible?  Surely not.  What if the boat engine needs replacing or we need new rigging?  How long will our sails last?  What if our rudder falls off?  What if our boat becomes a money pit?!

Okay, well maybe we'll have to dip into that money every now and then ... but first we'll try to pick up income along the way.  After all, Ken and I are both smart and he can build a house for God's sake!  We've got some ideas that we're keeping to ourselves for now.  Yeah, we'll be okay .... right?  Okay, well maybe if we just dip into that money just a LITTLE bit every year.  We'll invest the money, so we should be able to make as much as we take out.  So taking a little bit every now and then to fill in the gaps won't be so bad ... if we make the right investment.  Where do we invest?

The stock market is volatile, but if we're patient and stay in for the long haul we may be okay.  But another "correction" is sure to be overdue.  So perhaps a CD ... that's a joke these days.  Okay, but if we keep our rentals they'll eventually be worth more and provide more income.  We could sell those someday ... but then we'd have to add all those years of depreciation to the profit for the tax man.  

Are you exhausted yet?  Are you keeping up?  Oh, my mind!  These are the thoughts that torment me every night.

One thing is certain ... we don't want to work the rest of our lives.  We're ready to travel and break through the mental barriers that our society has placed on us.  We're planning our next move ... just hope it's the right one.  Wait, what am I saying?  The "right" move is going for adventure and having the courage to leave the comforts of work and routine.  After all, it's not "comfortable" at all.

I'm sure that many cruisers-in-the-making have these same fears and thoughts, except for those financially fortunate.  I tell myself this is all part of the crossroads we've finally reached.  If we didn't have these thoughts and doubts then we're probably not feeling anything.  We just wanna make the right moves today, so our tomorrows are ones we want to live ... just like Suze Orman said. 

Have you had these thoughts?  What have you chosen to do to make sure you're not penniless someday?  We'd love to hear from you!

Hasta luego ... until then.  Mid-Life Cruising!
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Posted by Ken n Cheryl at 2:09:00 PM 10 comments
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Tuesday, December 2, 2014

One Down, Eleven To Go!

One down, eleven to go ...

No, I'm not talking about a 12 pack of Landsharks!  I'm talking about the 11 months we have until our lease on the condo is up.  If the next eleven go as fast as that first one ... we'd better start packing again!

Last Tuesday night we pretty much finished unpacking, put everything in its place (good practice for the boat since we downsized), and hung a few pictures to make the condo feel like "home" (the picture in the den ... a sailboat of course).  The next day Ken's dad and uncle arrived from Florida to spend Thanksgiving with us ... talk about a tight schedule!

As we sat at my mom's Thanksgiving table along with Ken's family, our daughter & son-in-law, my mom, dad & step-parents, my brother & his family ... I felt thankful to be at this point in our lives.  Sometimes it felt like we'd never unload the pressure & stress that came with the two houses we sold this year.  Having that weight lifted off our shoulders is definitely something to be thankful for.  I tell ya, there's been a few times over the past several years that we could have lost everything if two tenants bailed at the same time.  We're so thankful that didn't happen!  Instead, we now have an emergency fund for our rentals and we're making plans to start cruising in a year.  It just goes to show that baby steps forward do finally pay off ... a plan, patience and perseverance my friends!   Oh, and another thing we're thankful for ... we got our first electric bill the other day and it was just under $38 for 23 days.  Let the savings begin!

Anyway, after stuffing ourselves on Thanksgiving we made a trip to the French Quarter the following day and walked off a few calories.  Sunday morning we hugged Ken's family goodbye and put together the Christmas tree later that day.  (Yep, we have an artificial tree and it still looks great after many years).  We'd just finished placing everything, and I'm already back in the attic and re-arranging things!  Sometime this week Ken will indulge in the annual ritual of plugging in the Christmas tree lights and seeing how many survived since last year ... and how many will go out after they're on the tree.  Aaaah, the joy of Christmas.  Those lights have caused me to swear like a sailor too many times.  It may take Ken all week to motivate himself to deal with that after work, so I told our daughter to wait until the weekend before coming over with her husband to decorate the tree.  Halloween as we were moving out of our house, and now it's Christmas time.  Huh?!  

Ken and I are going to relax and enjoy the next month and Christmas, but after that we'd better make a plan and a schedule for Nirvana ... time's flying!

Hasta luego ... until then.  Mid-Life Cruising!
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Posted by Ken n Cheryl at 10:12:00 AM 1 comments
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Monday, May 5, 2014

Still ...

St. Thomas, USVI ... 2012

Just over 2 years ago, I wrote about our struggles to cruise and get the house on the market.  I read over this post again, and sadly realized that I could have written this post today!  Other than putting the house on the market, we're faced with the same struggles ... still.

We're still working more than 5 days a week, we're still dealing with deadbeat tenants (it's the 5th and no rent), we're still doing maintenance on our house, and we're still waiting for the house to sell.  However, we're hopeful that this will be our year!  Our house was shown yesterday (they loved it but don't know if they can afford it ... shouldn't they have figured that out first?!) and will be shown again today.  The negative talk about flood insurance has finally seemed to stop, and recent changes should have folks realizing that the premiums aren't that bad ... at least not for our house.

Another thing we're still doing ... planning on cruising!   Sometimes it seems we're never gonna get there, and when you have plenty of time to think about things ... you start having doubts.  What if this is just wrong for us?  What if we're giving our house away?  But, we always come back to the same conclusion ... we're not giving up.  Heck, giving up wouldn't be any easier anyway.  We'd continue to be stuck working all the time and never getting anywhere.

So, when are we going to start doing some sailing stuff?  Well, it doesn't look like it will be any sooner than June.  While we can't wait to put the sails back on Nirvana and take her to the lake, every weekend for the next month is booked.  Between work, our daughter's college graduation, a good friend's wedding, and maintenance to our house there just isn't any extra time this month.  We're hoping that we'll have plenty of time for sailing this Summer (and the rest of our lives), but I guess we gotta be patient.

We did get some time on the lake yesterday.  After working Saturday and early Sunday, we joined our friends on their SeaRay power boat.  The day was gorgeous and we had a great time.  I didn't get any pictures ... for two reasons.  My camera keeps acting up and hasn't worked since it died at the end of our riverboat cruise.  Even if it had been working, I just feel funny pulling out the camera during certain times.  I don't want to be disrespectful.  I guess everyone's taking pictures nowadays, but sometimes I'd be the only one with the camera, so I just keep it tucked away.

Just like Easter Sunday, as soon as we got home and relaxed ... our tenant called with a problem!  We managed to put it off till today ... lucky us.  

Oh, one more thing we're still doing as in our post from two years ago ... planning a vacation!  Back then we were planning a trip to the US and British Virgin Islands with our credit card miles.  If you haven't heard ... we're going to Mexico this summer (also with our credit card miles).  We can't wait!

Hasta luego ... until then.  Mid-Life Cruising!
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Posted by Ken n Cheryl at 11:39:00 AM 3 comments
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Tuesday, February 25, 2014

A Happy Face!

  
Recently I received a private message on our Facebook page from one of followers.  She asked how I continue to remain so upbeat and positive after such a long struggle towards our cruising plans.  My answer ... we get frustrated and depressed sometimes, but try to keep positive online.  (While misery loves company, we want to inspire folks who are struggling like us ... not cause them to get depressed and throw in the towel).

I told her that we sometimes get downright fed up with everything and feel like we'll never live on our sailboat.  We curse, we lie awake at night, and we constantly run our plans through our head ... wondering if we can do something differently that will allow us to get out there sooner than later.  We always come up with the same conclusion ... we're doing the best we can.

Our house is for sale at a very fair price and for as little as we can afford to sell it for.  We've left just enough room for a little bit of negotiation, knowing that human nature prevents selling just about anything at full price.  We rarely buy clothes, never go to the spa, have a friend come to our house to cut our hair, have no movie channels on the television, have no car notes, only go out for a drink during "happy hour", bring a cold sandwich to work everyday, only go to the movie theater about once a year ... you get the picture.  As I mentioned in "Everything Is Broken" ... it's tough to balance managing our businesses & our home with preparing for cruising.  A good business needs re-investment and a good home needs maintenance.  We've been putting some things off ... but for how long can we get away with it?  Some of our business stuff is on its last leg, and our refrigerator, washer & dryer at home are too.

I admit that we sometimes look at other cruisers with envy, wondering why their transition was so much easier than ours has been.  There are those that sold their homes almost immediately!  We've been frugal all of our lives, have worked hard since high school, have always been responsible, and have never been frivolous with our money.  We deserve a break, right?!  As I've written over a year ago, there is an emotional toll of reaching a goal.  We have our pity party every now and then, but you know ... it doesn't help matters.

No, we're not perfect.  We don't always keep a smile on our face.  But, we know that a bad attitude can only bring negative, while a good attitude will make things easier.  We know that there are others out there that share our same dream, and have their own struggles.  Hopefully, our posts will help them hang in there with us ... and their own dreams.

So, when we get overwhelmed we try to remind ourselves that we at least have a goal and a light at the end of the tunnel.  We know that with the exception of a tragedy (fingers crossed), our situation isn't permanent and we will be on that damn boat.  Good things don't always come easy ... or quickly!  Plus, our landlubber life isn't all bad.  As I mentioned before, the next few months will bring us Mardi Gras, our daughter's wedding, and her college graduation as well.

Visualizing ourselves sailing through the gorgeous blue waters of the Bahamas keeps us going ... not to mention the supportive comments of our readers.  While I don't get a chance to respond to all of your comments, I love reading them and they lift my spirits.  Please keep them coming, 'cause we really appreciate it.  It's gonna be one helluva Bon Voyage party!

Hasta luego ... until then.  Mid-Life Cruising!
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Posted by Ken n Cheryl at 10:57:00 AM 4 comments
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Wednesday, November 13, 2013

Betting On Later?

Taken at St. Thomas, USVI*

Time flies by and things have been a blur, but not much going on lately.  We're reluctantly in with the herd, going to work and doing the same thing day in and day out.  It reminds me of something I saw at "The Blue Man Group" show (excellent by the way).  During part of the show, there was this huge screen that showed a cartoon of people walking in a robotic state and funneling into a chute ... like a bunch of cattle.  They punched in at work and went through the day, just like the rest of the herd.  They didn't speak or show emotion, so they weren't questioning their life.  They just did what was expected.

I watched that cartoon years before thoughts of cruising, but I remember the impact it made on me.  It really put things into perspective, and I knew I didn't wanna be part of that herd my entire life.  I want to be that raging bull, busting through the cattle gate and running through the pasture!

When I look at the quote above, I think it explains why Ken and I get so impatient about cruising.  Our dream is taking longer than we anticipated, and there are too many reminders that life is short.  We understand that every day is a gift, and we know that we can't take them for granted.

When Ken and I were building our dream house in 1996, I remember dreaming of the day I woke up in our new home.  I also remember hoping that I'd live long enough to see that day.  I'm not paranoid or a hypochondriac ... I just know that I'm human like everyone else, and shit happens.  Needless to say, I lived to wake up in our dream home ... for many years.  I felt very lucky and grateful.

This quote also reminds me of those that are lucky enough to live a long life, but always think they have time to "do it later".  The months turn into years, which turn into decades.  The plans are never put into place, and then before they know it ... they're 80 years old with no possibility of living their dream.  Several of our relatives are a perfect example.  Three of the four people are in their seventies/eighties with no savings and lots of debt.  The fourth is healthy and financially comfortable, but the spouse has been in poor health for several years ... they're not able to do much of anything because of this.  "Later" didn't work out too well for these folks.
  
 I can't wait till Nirvana is our home, and I wake up in her bed.  Until I do, I feel like I'm rolling the dice ... and I don't play craps!  The best way to win this bet and see our next dream come true is to take action now, not later.  It's taking longer than we hoped, but everyday we remain focused and continue to make steps towards winning the bet and living the life we want ... are you?

Hasta luego ... until then.  Mid-Life Cruising!

*BTW, as I reviewed this post I noticed my spelling error in the picture above.  Oh well, I'm not gonna sweat the small stuff!
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Posted by Ken n Cheryl at 1:36:00 PM 10 comments
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