Film Experience Blog

Oh hello there. You're back? I'm just basking in the beauty that is this new Rabbit Hole poster. I loved the first one, too. What is happening? Posters are supposed to be terrible and they keep doing right by this film. This one visually gets at the disconnect between two people who are still very much connected,  physically, legally, experientally and emotionally. I love it.

We're down to the finish line on major Oscar hopeful 2010 releases now.

• Dec 3rd: Black Swan
• Dec 10th: The Fighter
• Dec 17th: Rabbit Hole
• Dec  22nd: True Grit
• the dread last split second of eligibility strategy: Another Year, Blue Valentine

I'm still awaiting The Fighter and True Grit (both within the next week). [Silly tangent: People were making fun of me mistyping Rabbit Hole on twitter and facebook. I keep typing Rabbit HOle or Rabbit Hold --- wtf? -- squeeze those slutty bunnies! [/tangent]


 Earlier this year I wrote a Best in Show column for Tribeca Film on the wonder that was John Hawkes in Winter's Bone. Now that he's up for a Spirit Awards, can he become something more than a longshot for Oscar? Why is it that some terrific performances have such difficulty getting traction and other adequate ones sail through to Oscar nominations? Let's not give up hope yet. Matt Singer at IFC wrote up a fine tribute to Hawkes

The man wears menace like cologne.

Beautifully put. Go read it.

VYou "What Shall I Draw" fufilled my request to draw an actress winning an Oscar, but managed to impugn my actressexuality at the same time. Check it out...

"If it weren't for Nathaniel R and his support, I don't know where I'd be right now. Probably not chained in his basement..." LOL.

Oh relax, WSID, I only keep them in chains for a week or two, tops. After the actress has dutifully read her latest script pile and chosen her next project I release her back to the studios to provide all of us with more cinematic pleasures.  Everyone thank me!

P.S. If you haven't checked out vyou yet, you should. A lot of fun over there. I have an account but I'm having trouble with my mic. I shall answer your questions as soon as I fix. Or maybe I shall have to learn mime.

Finally, ... Broadway.com reports that Bloody Bloody Andrew Jackson, the irreverent historical emo rock musical political satire (yes all those things) is closing in just one month on Broadway. A lot of shows are closing actually - tough season. If you're in NYC during December try the lottery for BBAJ. That's how I saw it. You end up front row, way too close to the flying spittle but it's very funny and fast. Major selling point: Meryl Streep's future son-in-law Benjamin Walker has total star charisma. He turned down the role of Beast in X-Men: First Class to stay with Bloody Bloody so see him before he gets more famous. If casting directors are wise (always a risky "if") he'll be flooded with offers once he quits with the live bloodletting.

The actual hour-long Hollywood Reporter video of the six actresses who grace their cover: Annette Bening, Nicole Kidman, Amy Adams, Hilary Swank, Natalie Portman and Helena Bonham-Carter. Here's how it breaks down if you don't have a full hour to watch (video at bottom of post). Unfortunately you can't "scroll" so the time stamps are useless as I type away.


0:01 Helena talks about first day-i-tis. Never thinks she can do it. I can't act!
1:30 Amy talks about being unemployed and feeling sorry for herself (interesting bit... both sad and funny) and the long time period where she considered giving up. But now that she's successful, what doesn't she like about her career?

Amy: I feel very vulnerable. I don't like it at all. You're very subject to other people's opinions. You know when it doesn't go well. 

Hilary: We know when it doesn't go well. We don't need to be beat over the head with it.

Oopsie!

5:00 Swank talks about trying and even if you fail, always try your hardest. Ah platitudes! I didn't get enough of 'em on election night.
6:48 Annette is asked about her input into making The Kids Are All Right more of a comedy than it originally started as...

Annette: I just didn't want it to be earnest. But she's (Lisa Cholodenko) also kind of too generous when she talks about me and my contributions.

9:00 Helena interrupts to talk about the vibrator scene (but says she hasn't seen the movie).
10:30 Hilary complains that she can't find good comedies. Uhnnh, you're not a comic actress. We're 10 minutes in and Nicole has said NOTHING. I need Nicki. But she was like this at the Margot at the Wedding press conference I attended, too. She is kind of robotic until directly addressed. I say that with the utmost love but it's like she's a robot until the movie camera is on or the press cameras are off. It's... odd.
12:00 Natalie Portman calls the Black Swan screenplay "a blueprint." and reveals that she and Darren Aronofsky have been planning to make the movie for the past 9 years (!) and credits Nicole with the following great career advice...

Jose here.



As I was watching The Story of Adele H. yesterday it struck me how Isabelle Adjani is still one of the few actresses to have been Oscar nominated more than once for performances in a foreign language.
Only twelve actresses have received Best Actress nominations for non-English speaking roles (the Academy usually waits for them to work in Hollywood and then reward them...see Simone Signoret, Juliette Binoche, Ingrid Bergman and Penélope Cruz) and out of these ladies, only three have repeated; Adjani (75 and 89), Liv Ullmann (72 and 76) and Sophia Loren (61 and 64).
Out of them only Ms. Loren won.

This bears repeating and celebrating today, more than any other time, because it happens to be her birthday.
She was born, wait for it, 76 years ago in Rome where she spent her childhood dancing, playing the piano and migrating to the country after she was injured during an attack in WWII.
A shrapnel during a bombing hit her chin forcing her parents to leave the city to protect their daughter.
Shallow intermission but can you imagine if something else had happened to her face?
She became to be known the world over as a sex symbol and one of the most beautiful women that ever lived. Guess things happen for a reason huh?

Besides her blessed physiognomy Loren is also a phenomenal actress. Did you know she's the most awarded actress in history next only to Meryl Streep?
Watching Sophia play earthy characters and vamps is always a treat but I guess my favorite performance of hers is in the movie version of Verdi's Aida. She has never seemed more vulnerable and larger than life for me.



Take a look at her legendary face and tell us what's your favorite Sophia Loren film?

Have we met? I've only been a member since you opened.
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popbytes Mia Farrow vs. Naomi Campbell in the blood diamonds trial -- this is such a crazy story. Who will play Mia and Naomi in the tv movie? You know they'll make one.
Now Kindly Undo These Straps remembers The Witches of Eastwick. Are you an Alexandra, a Jane or a Sukie?
Sheila O'Malley a really fine Patricia Neal tribute with interesting notes from the two key romances of her life (Gary Cooper and Roald Dahl)
Rants of a Diva a playlist inspired by Best Actress nominees? It's a must download.
Nicks Flick Picks finally names his Best Actresses of 2009. Great tweet sized writeups.

Psssst. Angels in America 'best shot' participatory post is coming tonight. might be a bit late. Are you joining in?

As some of you know, I had the opportunity to sit down with Julianne Moore last week. The occasion was the release of The Kids Are All Right, Julianne's 48th movie and one of her very best. Julianne plays "Jules" the flighty wife of "Nic" played by Annette Bening. They've raised two children together. Nic had Joni (Mia Wasikowska) and soon thereafter Jules had Laser (Josh Hutcherson). It's one of Julianne's best comic performances in a career that's mostly been noted for her dramatic magic with internally shell shocked women. But it wasn't always accolades. Julianne's big screen career started twenty years ago this summer when the horror flick Tales of the Darkside was released. Inauspicious beginnings but no matter.

My history with Julianne doesn't stretch back quite that far. I first took true notice of Julianne in Benny & Joon (1993) when she was playing a former (bad) actress turned waitress. In one of the movies most endearing scenes, Johnny Depp mimics her horror performance that he's memorized as they watch it together. She nearly dies of embarrassment. Five years later, I did more than notice her. I fell madly in love with her in her next bad actress incarnation as porn star Amber Waves. Ironically, though those two key bad actress roles were the beginning of my major Moore obsession, the woman herself is anything but a bad actress. She's one of the greats.

The first incarnation of The Film Experience (my baby that you're reading right now) was actually a print zine called "FiLM BiTCH" and Julianne Moore was the first iconic (literally) cover girl. I painted her as a religious icon. I met Julianne once before in 2002 on the Oscar campaign trail for Far From Heaven but it was a simple 'hello, good luck' type of public event and my girl friend snapped this dorky photo.


I knew when I was granted an actual audience with Ms Moore eight years later that I'd have to risk the ridiculous and bring my post collegiate / pre website zine with me to show her. Entering the plush hotel suite, I told Julianne I was nervous. "I'm not scary," she assured warmly and then we discussed what to drink (sparkling water it was) and then she actually poured me a glass. Her serving me... What universe is this?! I told her I wasn't scary either. It was important for her to know that, I joked, before we began since I was about to whip out the truly fannish obsessiveness. Julianne took it all in stride, laughing, and even seemed to enjoy the history as I showed her the zine.

(I've bolded, italicized and explained to give you a sense of my interpretation of what follows)

Nathaniel: You actually inspired my writing career inadvertently, I'm not even joking.

Julianne: No kidding? [Wide eyed look at magazine, squeals] Did you make a magazine?

Nathaniel: I did.

Julianne: Oh my gosh, that's nuts!!! [reading aloud] "Julianne Moore is God" [laughter]. You're so sweet! Holy cow. This is crazy.

Nathaniel: I even brought one for you in case you have a stash of weird fan things.

Julianne: Well, thank you. I'm very touched. [Signed the cover] Can you read this? It says "To Nathaniel, with love and deep appreciation"

Nathaniel: You know what it was? It was Boogie Nights. I had so many feelings about that movie at the time that conversations weren't enough so I had to start writing. I'm being totally serious. You were a big inspiration.

Julianne: That's so cool. I'm very touched.

Nathaniel: So that said --that crazy story said -- how weird is fame for you?

Julianne: [Laughs]

Nathaniel: Strangers giving you gifts. Have you totally acclimated to it?

Julianne: It's funny. We were just talking -- my friend who I've known for a really long time -- he was talking about reality stars. And people just want to be famous. I said, 'I don't understand that. I don't understand fame without content.' Because it's not -- I don't know if fame is anything in particular. I feel like it's an offshoot of something else.

You know I always said to my kids when they were little, especially when they'd see me on a magazine, and like, if somebody said 'Are you there because you're famous?' I'd say to them 'No, I'm there because of this job that I do and this job requires that I do this other public stuff.' I think if it's not rooted in something that you actually do, then it becomes -- then it's not necessarily a comfortable thing.


And also I'm not wildly famous, you know? I'm a person who is sort of moderately famous.

Nathaniel: But your fame, the ascendance of your fame, happened in lockstep when things were getting really crazy for famous people in the late 90s.

Julianne: Actually, that's true. There was never... when you were an actor, there was never any expectations that it was going to come with all this other stuff. Suddenly the whole celebrity culture blossomed around the same time.

That stuff, I think, is unusual. I think you've got to compartmentalize. It has to be a completely different thing.

Nathaniel: So, The Kids Are All Right. I read that you signed on because of High Art. Love that film. You signed on before while Lisa was still writing it? Is that correct?

Julianne: Well, no. What happened was I met Lisa at a Women in Film luncheon. I went over to meet her and I said 'Hey, why didn't I see the script to High Art?' She laughed. And I was like 'No, seriously. I don't understand. I see all these scripts. I never saw your script.' I loved the movie. I just thought it was great. She kind of laughed. I said 'Well, you know...' We agreed that we liked each other and we had a meeting. She said 'I'm going to write something for you one of these days.' Not too long after that she sent me Kids... which she had written with me in mind.

And then it was a period of four or five years before we finally got it off the ground. So, I would have done anything she sent me, probably. And it just happened to be this really terrific script. And then there were many iterations of it: Stuart came on as a co-writer, the script became much more comedic in tone. But it was always something I really responded to.

Nathaniel: Because you were involved early, did you have any input into the character?

Julianne: I don't do that.

Nathaniel: You don't?

Julianne: I actually don't do that. I like the tension between the character and the actor. So I don't want to say things, like, "I wanna make her blah blah blah."

But I will get attached to certain things. There was some stuff in the movie -- remember I had that line when Annette and I walk away and I say that thing about Jose. 'I had to fire him he was a crack addict.'?

Nathaniel: Hilarious.

Julianne: Yeah. That was a line that was left from another scene, another version, where I kept talking about the gardener having a huge drug problem and how I have to do something about it. It was so funny and then it got cut. I was like 'I'm bringing it back!' I didn't care that it was on our backs as we were walking away. I'm just throwing it back in there.

In that sense I will harvest thing from other versions.

Nathaniel: I know you don't talk about your process that much.

Julianne: Right.

Nathaniel: A little nugget? I know the scripts mean a lot to you. Do you just read them a lot and internalize or if someone grabbed your script would it be just covered in notes?

Julianne: Almost nothing in the script. If there are line changes I put them in. My scripts are pretty empty. It's just about internalizing it, actually, like you said. I read it...think about it... think about it. It kind of percolates. The interesting thing is that I might not do a lot of writing on it and that kind of stuff but I get really upset if I don't have the script for a few months. It has to be there for me to be reading and thinking about.

Nathaniel: On the set?

Julianne: Before I'm shooting. If someone says to me 'Hey we're shooting this movie in two weeks.' 'WHAT? WHAT I need...' I like to have the script for a couple of months at least because I have this process of thinking and thinking about it.

Nathaniel: One thing I loved about the performance is the energy with Annette Bening -- I'm sure this is conscious -- there's a little bit of shrinking back like you were almost one of the kids in the family?

Julianne: Right, right.

Nathaniel: I thought it was really interesting. With your peer group of actresses ... you've done The Hours with Kidman and Streep but you didn't have scenes with them.

Julianne: We were all separate.

Nathaniel: I was wondering. What was that like working with someone [Annette Bening] of your stature, so to speak?

Julianne: Great! It was great. It was definitely a partnership, a marriage. It was our job to illuminate that and the dynamics of that marriage. And insomuch as she [Jules] doesn't seem to be the dominant partner, you realize that she has an emotional transparency and fluidity that her wife [Nic] doesn't have.


She might not be the one making the decisions or the money or whatever but then you realize, oh, but she's the fun one. It might seem like someone is in charge but then you go 'noooo...' There's all this balance, I think.

Nathaniel: The script is beautiful. You haven't had that many opportunities to be paired with an actress.

Julianne: No, you never get to do that. Who was I just talking to about this? Just to be around women. It's very exciting. You're always with guys. Always, always, always with guys. I was just talking about this to this young actress, this girl, Emma Stone. Most of your career you spend with men.

Nathaniel: Paul Thomas Anderson and Todd Haynes are two of your most famous collaborators. How different are they than Lisa Cholodenko to work with?

Julianne: You know, every person is different. Every director is different by virtue of who they are. But the directors that have interested me and who I've had successful collaborations with are people with very strong visions. That's sort of my job to facilitate that, to be a conduit for their words and imagery. To get it out there. A lot of it with an actor is to figure out, to be somewhat adaptable to whatever their personal, like, vibe is. That's interesting to me, to key into that and avail yourself to that.

Nathaniel: You've played lesbians before even though it's not a famous part of your career like 50s housewives, for example. And you've worked with a lot of gay directors.

Julianne: Yeah.

Nathaniel: Have you always felt that affinity with the gay community?

Julianne: I don't know that... [Considering her words] I always hate to be divisive about gender or sexuality or race or anything like that. I feel like sometimes, even with the best of intentions, when we put ourselves into boxes, it ends up being a less universal thing.

But I will say that I've always worked with filmmakers who are interested in very human, not so much plot driven, stories -- more kind of character and emotionally driven. And a lot of gay filmmakers fall into that category.

[At this point Julianne and I were interrupted. My time was coming to a close. Time is a cruel mistress. Wrap up! For the finale, I couldn't resist swinging way back to the beginning.]

Nathaniel: I have to ask you this because I was giggling to myself outside about your career and how long I've followed it.

Julianne: It's so cute.

Nathaniel: I've seen all of your movies but four.

[At this last confession outburst, Julianne registers a split second of shock, followed by hilariously self-deprecating sympathy.]

Julianne: Really? My god, you've seen some junk then!

Nathaniel: Twenty years ago -- your debut on screen was twenty years ago, in Tales of the Darkside. When you were being killed by the mummy, did you ever imagine this future for yourself?


Julianne: No.

Nathaniel: ...Oscar nominations?

Julianne: No way. No way.

The funny thing about that mummy movie is that I didn't even read the end of it. Because I have this tendency not to read the stage directions. I just like dialogue. At the end of the movie there's all this stuff about me being, you know, attacked by the mummy and I thought I was finished. I remember the director says to me you 'You didn't read the end, did you?' I was like 'UH OH!'

So, no, I didn't imagine it at all. I just wanted to work. I just wanted steady work.

Nathaniel: It was so nice to meet you.

Julianne: I'm so flattered. Oh Nathaniel, thank you.

<-- Julianne on the day we met.

As I rose to leave I offered my hand to shake and Julianne threw out her arms for a hug instead.

I'd run out of time. I already knew I was her last interview before her lunch break after a full morning of interviews. It was ending and we hadn't even talked about the sore topic (to fans at least) of her Oscar record! I collected my bag and we said our final goodbyes. I couldn't help a smidgeon of small talk about the Oscars... the good lucks and such. "I'm pissed you haven't won yet," I grumbled. She smiled. She's heard this a million times, though she said nothing of the sort. "Oh," she said, shooing it off sensibly "As long as I keep getting jobs." And then she was off to lunch and I was floating away, having met one of the great screen actresses and a personal inspiration, too.

And for the record, no.

No, I never imagined any of this either when I was painting that oil portrait of her in 1997 and affectionately nicknaming her "god" with other actress-loving friends. No way. No way.
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Since Towleroad is all about the Gay the list is men but since I'm an actressexual and since all the best people are at least bi-curious when it comes to the movies, you know I can't ignore the silver screen sirens. I haven't seen all of these movie but here's an incomplete overview of the year thus far.

Jose here.



Today is the anniversary of Susan Hayward's birth (she would've turned 93). Browsing through her filmography it struck me how conflicted I am regarding her acting. Despite her extreme beauty (what did they feed these women back then?) I find her acting slightly hammy sometimes and rather inexpressive on different occasions.

Hayward was nominated for five Best Actress Oscars and perhaps the reason for my slight discontent with her is that in a way, she created the "easy way to an Oscar nod". Let's take a look at the characters that got her Oscar's attention and the reasons why AMPAS couldn't resist to nominate her:

1946 Angelica 'Angie'/'Angel' Evans Conway in Smash-Up, The Story of a Woman
Angelica is a club singer who marries a rising performer, gives up her career and becomes an alcoholic. The plot is loosely based on the life of Dixie Lee, Bing Crosby's first wife.
(AMPAS buttons it pushed: alcoholism, deglam, suffering wife, performer, semi biopic)

1949 Eloise Winters in My Foolish Heart
Eloise is a wife reflecting on the twists her life has taken. Based on J.D. Salinger's short story Uncle Wiggily in Connecticut.
(AMPAS buttons it pushed: suffering wife, decade spanning drama, famous song, literary pedigree)

1952 Jane Froman in With a Song in My Heart
Real life singer Froman had a terrific career in film and song, until she was almost killed in a plane crash in 1943. She overcame adversity in every possible way and went on to have a fruitful life and career (Froman even outlived Hayward).
(AMPAS buttons it pushed: famous song, decade spanning drama, deglam, biopic, overcoming tragedy)

1955 Lillian Roth in I'll Cry Tomorrow
Roth was a real life Broadway star who overcame her mother's domineering and becomes an alcoholic after the death of her fiancé.
(AMPAS buttons it pushed: do I really have to point them out at this point?)

1958 Barbara Graham in I Want to Live! (pictured left)
Real life prostitute, drug addict and manipulative Barbara Graham gets convicted for murder and executed.
(AMPAS buttons it pushed: biopic, murder, jail, decade spanning drama, deglam)

Hayward finally got her Oscar for this role and was never nominated afterward. So now do you see my point? Hayward was great at this sort of campy melodramatic, fictionalized biopics but her career can't help but leave a bittersweet aftertaste.

Perhaps we wouldn't have instant wins for the Reeses, Marions and Charlizes if it weren't for Hayward. Or maybe I'm just rambling. What's your take on this?
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<--- Mrs. Best Actress and Mr. Best Actor, 1954.
But OOPS. Marlon Brando won but Judy didn't.

It's my birthday in just three days and I've been feeling so down, largely due to pet stress. I've also misplaced my creative mojo. I don't want to say I've lost it. ("It must be here somewhere," he says with budding panic in his voice.)


My first birthday gift arrived early: Nick reviewed Natalie Wood's Oscar nominated Splendor in the Grass (1961) performance. That's one of my very favorite performances, Oscar-nominated or otherwise by one of my favorite movie stars. When feeling blue, it's a good idea to lose yourself in actressing. My birthday gift to myself was The Michelle Pfeiffer Star Collection. My pronounced film obsession doesn't translate to DVD ownership (I know some people find that odd... but that's just the way it is) so I didn't have any of these yet, not even The Fabulous Baker Boys! I know, I know. I think I was holding out for the European version which I'd heard had better extras.

I think I'll just keep this old gif of 100 favorite actresses (I'll update it someday -- it definitely needs major revisions) on perma-loop to the top right corner of my screen.



Whenever I glance up, some talented beauty will be appearing and then vanishing, only to be replaced by another. The actress mojo is never lost or misplaced, and ever increases.

Jose here.



The luscious Anouk Aimée turns 78 today.
If you ask me, too few people love her nowadays, heck most don't even seem to know who she is, despite the fact she has worked with some of the greatest filmmakers of all time.

So for those of you who don't know her well.

If you're into auteurs...Anouk's the femme for you!
She has worked with Federico Fellini, Alberto Lattuada, Anatole Litvak, Vittorio de Sica, Jacques Demy & Agnes Varda, Marco Bellocchio, Robert Altman and of course Claude Lelouch.

If you're an actressexual...Anouk's the femme for you!
She was nominated for an Oscar for A Man and a Woman for which she also won a Golden Globe and BAFTA.
Plus if you think Diane Lane's train scene in Unfaithful was all sorts of brilliant, you have to see how Anouk invents the whole "amazing display of emotions in seconds while riding a train" in the Oscar winning movie.

Also if you liked Marion Cotillard in Nine (one of the few things people agreed on liking about the movie) then you're going to love Anouk's original portrayal of Luisa in Fellini's 8½.

So there you have it, more than enough reasons to seek her if you don't know her and for those of us who already love her to celebrate her existence even more.

Joyeux anniversaire to her.

It's time for the Monday Monologue.

I don't think we've ever discussed Oliver! (1968) in all the years of The Film Experience. Weird. Today it's often disparaged as a typical example of the bloat of 1960s musicals. It's six Oscar haul (including Best Picture) is to blame for much of the critical animosity it engenders. Oscar enthusiasts know that winning the big prize isn't always good for your place in film history.

When I was a child I couldn't get enough of this musicalized telling of Oliver Twist. And it probably won't surprise you to hear that literally every one of my favorite scenes was focused on Nancy, the prostitute with the heart of gold (Shani Wallis). It may well have been the first movie to unlock my actressexuality. I was obsessed with Nancy's sadness, her maternal instincts, her slightly forced joy, her ginger hair, her heaving bosom. Okay, yeah, and maybe I danced in front of the television and got really into that "I'd Do Anything" number where all those smudge faced orphan boys declare their love for her. What of it?

I haven't seen the movie in years but the number that haunts in the memory and that I'm absolutely sure I didn't understand as a kid is "As Long As He Needs Me". Nancy has just been violently back-handed by her man Bill Sikes (Oliver Reed) because she doesn't want to go along with his criminal plans.


She exits the scene humiliated as her adoring orphans look on stunned. Once outside of this den of thieves she watches her beloved bully of a boyfriend walking away down the street and tears fill her eyes.

Not all ballads double as monologues but this one sure does. Wallis even begins the number talk-singing.

As long as he needs me.
Oh yes he does need me.
In spite of what you see, I'm sure that he needs me.

As her song progresses, the talk-singing gives way to a fuller musical performance but Wallis's vocal style is mostly subdued. She's not pulling out any vocal pyrotechnics to distract you with her pipes. She's playing the emotions more than the notes.

Who else would love him still
When they been used so ill?
He knows I always will as long as he needs me.


I miss him so much when he is gone but when he's near me I don't let on.

The way I feel inside... The love I have to hide... But hell, I got my pride as long as he needs me.

What's fascinating about the structure of the song (and the detailing of Wallis's performance) is that it's both interior monologue and plea for audience understanding. As such it's more in keeping with stage traditions than the cinema where the fourth wall is more sacrosanct. Nancy's monologue keeps swinging back and forth between addressing us (notice all the questions and the "yous" and the "people") and dark retreats into her romantic interior spaces.


At this point in the song/monologue Nancy hesitates for the last time as if she's still unsure if she should keep justifying her love or start carelessly shouting it. Her final excuses begin to emerge, the abused victim apologizing for the abuser. (I didn't understand the adult psychology of this at all as a child). Once she's gotten this out of the way, the belting commences.

He doesn't say the things he should. He acts the way he thinks he should. But all the same, I'll play the game his way.

As long as he needs me, I know where I must be. I'll cling on steadfastly as long as he needs me. As long as life is long. I'll love him... right or wrong. And somehow I'll be strong, as long as he needs me.

After several of these belted phrases the masochistic sadness of the song really sinks in. It's a heartbreaker. And Nancy knows she's broken.

If you are lonely, than you will know... when someone needs you, you love them so.

There'll be no turning back for Nancy once she's uttered this last rationalization. She'll sing her love for this man until it's the death of her. It's quite obvious that it will be.

I won't betray his trust, though people say I must. I've got to stay true just as long as he needs me.

The climactic lines are sung in far away profile and the song ends with Nancy's back to the camera as she walks slowly away. It's an incredibly sad exit, made more powerful by the use of the forgotten movie grammar of the long shot. Not every scene should be in close-up. Sometimes you have to let your actors walk away, diminished.


This film clip is strangely not available on YouTube so here are some other renditions of the song from the immortal Judy Garland through Ruthie Henshall to Melinda Doolittle...




I include the American Idol clip because, though Doolittle's voice amazes, it's sung without any emotional understanding of the song's content (the frequent bane of that particular pop culture behemoth). Like "Cabaret" after it, "As Long as He Needs Me" is a frequently misunderstood standard. The song is a defiant declaration of purpose, yes, but its mostly a terrible and desperate rationalization. If you don't sell both, you're just singing notes.
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I love actresses too much.

It makes life complicated for me emotionally. I fuss and fuss and fuss and refuse to fill out my Best Actress ballot each year because I don't want to leave any of my favorite ladies out. I don't want to hurt any of their (imaginary) feelings. Oscar, on the other hand, doesn't mind leaving my favorites out. They do it all the time.

The Oscar Nominees

• Sandra Bullock, The Blind Side
• Helen Mirren, The Last Station
  
• Carey Mulligan, An Education
  
• Gabourey 'Gabby' Sidibe, Precious
  
• Meryl Streep, Julie & Julia

In truth, I like all five of those performances. I think they're all good and better than the films that house them and they all strike me as very "right"... at least in terms of the idea that the Oscar lists are essentially an industry stamp, a group pronouncement of "This is what we do and value!". You've got the big stars in biopics (Meryl & Sandra), the breakout sensation (Mulligan), the old pro who could do this in her sleep but does it very very very well you have to admit (Mirren) and the magical debut (Sidibe).

I want Meryl Streep to win.

I've made no secret about that. I'm tired of waiting for that third Oscar to come and she's just delightful in Julie & Julia even if it's no patch on something like The Devil Wears Prada which she should have won for (I'm sorry but what she accomplished there was far beyond what Helen Mirren was doing in The Queen). But she didn't make my list (just barely). See what I mean about complicated emotions?

Whatever the outcome of Oscar's race -- and I can feel myself checking out on Best Actress in particular (my favorite category) -- because if Streep isn't going to win I'm so not interested. (I think Bullock's nomination is cute in a Big Hollywood way. But all the wins make me nauseous. That's taking it way too far. I see Roberto Benigni dancing on chairs again and everybody being embarrassed about their gigantor-obsession almost immediately after the house lights go up.)

My Favorite
But it's all beside the point anyway. I knew the Oscar year would be ruined for me the minute I saw Tilda Swinton in Julia some months ago.


I knew she'd barely be in the conversation come awards season but not only do I think it's the best performance of 2009, I think it's the best performance of 2008 AND 2009... (and maybe 2007, too). That's how great it is. Gold medal! Sorry to give the game away. And though I knew my favorite iconoclastic actress would barely be in the conversation I was and still am shocked that not one critics group could give it up for her. That's forty(proof) kinds of crazy. That's as crazy, reckless, incompetent and dumb as Julia herself! It's even dumber than Julia once you add in the widespread inexplicable shunning of Abbie Cornish in Bright Star. Look, I love Emily Blunt so don't take this the wrong way. She's done more for me than Abbie Cornish (in general) but no way was she more deserving of year-end attention for her costume parade than Cornish was for hers.


And yours?

P.S. You can now vote for your favorite among the Oscar nominees on the Best Actress page.

P.P.S. My 15 favorite lead actresses of the year (in alpha order) at this particular moment.


I didn't see everything obvs. And, oh crap, I know who I forgot already...

P.P.P.S. Have you O.D.ed on actressness just reading all of this?
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<--- "Looking good Barbie!"

Over at Towleroad I flame on to recount the highs and lows of gay(ish) cinema this year. Gay loosely defined of course. It's a speed read from last year's Milk Oscars through Valentino The Last Emperor and Brüno to this year's A Single Man buzz, with pit stops along the way to ogle the Hughs (Dancy and Jackman). Enjoy!

P.S. I forgot to mention Nine but that's more about actressexuality anyhow. And Guido Contini is definitely an actressexual.

Halfway through the day, pause a movie halfway through. What do you see?

Every life choice has its ups and downs. So goes the life of the actressexual. If you champion and obsess over actresses as I have since I was a little boy then every, oh, three to five years you will experience the superstar rise of an actress that you find unsupportable and that you wish the rest of the world would get over. Behold my 2007-2010 model: Kristen Stewart.

Jesse Eisenberg: I think you're incredible.
[pause. inhale]

Kristen Stewart: There's a lot of shit in my life.

I'm not ready for this...

There are many reasons to hate Kristen Stewart so she didn't really need to add taking a dump on adorabnoxious Jesse Eisenberg's dreams to the list. Since the Twilight movies have taken over the world, we will surely be seeing Kristen Stewart in dozens of movies over the next 5 or 6 years. She'll be in demand for every role for a twentysomething.

I'm not ready for this.

How will I tell one character from the next what will all the shoulder shrugging, painful intakes of breath, hair stroking, and general twitchiness that define every Stewart performance? Someone help me see things differently because I know I'll be seeing a lot of her. What am I missing? Please tell me that she'll at least play Joan Jett differently than this because I really want to enjoy The Runaways next year. I love Joan Jett. And I don't really remember her as the mopey, shrugging, self-loathing sort that Stewart specializes in.

So, no wonder that Eisenberg runs to the arms of "Lisa P" (Margarita Levieva) in Adventureland. Anything to break the monotony of Kristen's mannered & mopey miserabilism. As for the movie itself, I'm glad that some people found it so moving and worthwhile but I felt largely indifferent to it, though I did admire its partial commitment to languid summer moods and the tiny sparks of humor. And I liked Lisa P and her bestie dance partner Kelly. Loved the T-shirts, too. And the Giant Ass Panda. I'd pro'lly cheat to win one of those, too.
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Dave here, popping in to offer thoughts on a sliver of 2001's cinematic offerings as per Nat's request.

As a movie, crazy/beautiful isn't nearly as offbeat as its uncapitalized title and forward-slash want to suggest - the arc of the story is effortlessly predictable and the social divisions between the couple are often drawn in laughably implausible ways. But it marks itself out as a movie worth watching by having Kirsten Dunst burning a hole through the screen throughout. She seems to have been missing from the movies lately, which probably makes a lot of people quite happy... but I don't count myself as one of them. Her performance as Nicole in crazy/beautiful was perhaps the first time her charisma, as seen from her debut in 1994's Interview with a Vampire to 2000's energetic Bring It On, was backed up by blindingly evident acting chops.

She shoots this routine plot through with a bare-faced honesty, a vibrant but completely confused girl, switching from violent temper to coy flirt to desolate weeper at the blink of an eye. Her 'biggest' scene - a heightened encounter with her father and her cold stepmother - is sadly also the one crack in Dunst's armour, as she rather overdoes the emotional breakdown. But for the rest of the film, she makes Nicole a pathetic mess, but one that you can see the spark that attracts Carlos (Jay Hernandez) and makes him want to 'rescue' her. The film ends up spelling out why she's reached this state, but it's all been clear in Dunst's performance from the start - she's almost given up on herself at the very start, as she half-heartedly says "stay away, I'm dangerous" to Carlos and his friends. Frequently it's obvious how much she relies on other people to indulge her pretences, and Dunst excels at the self-conscious, pathetic sadness Nicole feels when someone cuts through it.

I'm not pretending it's the best performance of 2001 (not when Naomi Watts is staring at me...), but it certainly deserves more attention than it got and should remain a highlight of Kiki's career. Maybe her taking some time out of the limelight will help in final breaking her out of being perceived as a teenager and give up some parts, like Nicole, that are worthy of her considerable talent and charisma.

(A shallow postscript: is she not infinitely preferable with the glowing red hair to the slightly pasty-blonde? Yet another reason the Spider-Man movies - we'll just pretend the last one didn't happen - are golden.)

Update: I have also been asked to wait to write about the Q&A as well which featured the entire cast (sans Sophia Loren) -- so that's next week, too. Gazing upon Judi Dench and Daniel Day-Lewis in the same space but especially seeing Nicole Kidman and Penélope Cruz simultaneously (you know how I do) made my head explode.

I am actually typing this with no head. I am headless. The adrenaline in my muscle tissues is moving my fingers and at any moment I cou
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...there were scrapbooks!

My parents are moving, abandoning my childhood home, and I spent my holiday going through old boxes in storage. It's hard to part with any of these secret keys to unlock my childhood. There's heaps and heaps of homemade comic books featuring my own superhero creations which I shan't share (because they were never optioned for movies... not because they are totally embarrassing. Uh, yeah. Not because of that). Plus lots and lots of drawings of various X-Men, Madonna, Princess Leia and Luke Skywalker.

Many photo scrapbooks were uncovered including "MOVIES OF THE EIGHTIES"


Turns out The Film Experience was no fluke. I was always writing about movies... but when I was in junior high and high school, the writing was in list-making form and smelled like rubber cement instead of Apple computer.


The front and back covers are completely mainstream / boy friendly, and yet the inside jackets are so actressexual. It's as if my love for actresses was still reasonably contained, with Meryl Streep and Kathleen Turner whispering to me in pupa stage.

I was absolutely obsessed with the unseen-by-me Crimes of Passion (MPAA ratings scandal!) though I'm not sure I ever asked myself why... Kathleen Turner was enough cover for and emblem of any prurient reason.


Somewhere -- I cannot find it! -- there is a half-formed MOVIES OF THE NINETIES scrapbook which I began in college... but abandoned once the glorious internet took over my life and made scrapbooks actual items of nostalgia rather than just containers for the same.

Part 2 coming soon. some random funny clippings from the book.
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