On the Milky Road

One point for Monica Bellucci, one point for Kusturica, because he did make good movies (20 years ago) and one final point for the breathtaking scenery of Bosnia and Hercegovina, because it is truly a beautiful country, that I love very much. Else the movie is lost in over-accented symbolism, meandering but pointless search for goodness in the middle of the Bosnian war, and story that is so banal, that an evening cartoon for kids has a stronger plot.

I guess this film was made so the director/starring character got the chance to kiss Monica Bellucci and fullfil a lifetime dream. Trully disappointed by the lack of serious plot and common sense!

I saw several of Kusturica's past movies, and loved their surrealism, their being funny and dramatic at the same time. In this movie, these characteristics have become manneristic and decorative - they don't particularly add to the plot or ambiance, and almost get in the way at times. The two main characters are stiff and flat, and don't suscitate any empathy. At a certain point during the movie you start yawning and wishing they die soon. Very bad acting on the part of Bellucci, and Kusturica is even worse - please send him back behind the camera and tell him not to move from there. The rest of the cast was great, on the contrary.

It took years(4 years!) for Kusturica, the great Fellini copycat, to finish this movie, and I just realized why. This movie is just an elaborate framework for Kusturica to pork and rub against Monica Belucci, and he does it plenty in the movie. There are scenes where they're alone in the well, alone in the tree canopy, alone amidst the flock of sheep, alone in the river... His goal accomplished, he got plenty of time with his muse, how did he call her, a true European film diva so different than Hollywood actresses, or something similar. The same European diva that starred in big Hollywood franchises like Matrix and Bond movies, that starred in crappy Hollywood action movies opposite Clive Owen, Bruce Willis or Nic Cage?! Oh-oh, looks like his muse isn't that much different from Kusturica's arch-nemesis Angelina 'Maleficent' Jolie, after all.

'What about the movie, yo?!' If you're by any chance, a Johnny Depp fan(or who knows, maybe you're a Vincent 'The Brown Bunny' Gallo fan) you may have watched 'Arizona Dream'. Well, this movie is exactly the same like that one. Slapstick comedy + tragedy(violence) + episodes of soulful Balkan ethno music, it's all here too.

After watching this movie I officially ordain Kusturica the badge of 'Tommy Wiseau of European Cinema'. Who knows, if Wiseau had Kusturica's resources and the pristine backgrounds of REPUBLIKA SRPSKA to shoot his movies at, maybe his achievements would be greater.

Conclusion: Kusturica has the brains and the looks to play the Frankenstein in the next Universal's revivals of the character, if their negotiations with Javier Bardem fail.

I watched this movie at the Vue Cinema as part of the London Film Festival 2016.

A delirious "magical realism" that we have come to expect and love from an Emir Kusturica movie. He plays a Serbian milk man in love with a Serbian-Italian beauty played by Monica Bellucci.

We have a vicious clock, snakes that drink milk and wrap around people as a means of delaying them, female gymnastics out of this world and sheep that explode violently - not forgetting a literal blood bath.

The plot gets a bit over-tangled but there is nothing too over-the- top for Kusturica especially when trying to resolve a difficult situation, not even flying!

The backdrop of horrible warfare is almost matter-of-fact to the excessively romantic story that really matters here

This is cinematic anarchy in all its folkloric glory but it works and its highly entertainin