Piranha 2 3D

If you have seen any one of the Piranha movies going all the way back to 1978 then what is shown here is more of the same. By casting David Hasselhoff as himself they showed they really weren't even trying with this one.

The only awards the female lead Danielle Panabaker might win for her performance here is an Amber Tamblyn lookalike contest.

Set in the water park equivalent of a strip club with profoundly unlikeable and spectacularly dumb characters the essential hook here is to show naked people (Mostly women) and gore which is not something everyone wants to see together or even separately.

The gross-out factor gets to be pretty intense and for the second one of these movies in a row male genital mutilation is served up for audience approval and that isn't even the most disgusting thing shown.

What we see readily earns this flick its R rating within 10 minutes. There is political incorrectness and then there is Girls Gone Wild out-takes intercut with cheap indie horror. The piranhas look like claymation when you see them up close. You'd expect more from a production with a estimated $20 million budget.

Shot in Wilmington. North Cackalacky is rapidly becoming Hollywood Southeast.

This was more enjoyable than I thought. The acting was not as bad as some of the reviewers say, and for a film that doesn't take itself seriously, neither should you. I actually didn't mind the movie being short, after all it was always hard to stretch the storyline more than an hour.

The whole movie was more like a spoof, and somehow I felt Christopher Lloyd, Ving Rhames and of course The Hoff all added to the fun. The Hoff in particular was great. His role really suited him. He also had a bit more screen time than I would've thought.

I didn't see this in 3D, and I'm not sure if that would've changed my rating. There was a fair bit of gratuitous nudity, but I suppose the gratuitous gore balances that out.

So if you find gratuitous blood, body parts and boobs (and screaming) hilarious, this movie is worth a look over a beer and popcorn. And if you don't like it, it will be over before you know it.

Promising more of what Piranha brought you, this delivers less. A lot less. Less humor, less gore, less tension, less nudity, less edginess. Overall, it's just like one of those rip-off movies that comes out for rental right before a major movie comes out on disc. Maybe not a good example, but when Tom Cruise's War of the Worlds was due to be released, you saw knockoffs like "War Between Worlds". Those movies are drudgery to get through. It's cheap to have actors recite lines for 85 of the 90 minutes of a movie, and build a plot based upon that; but that's a different genre. When it's done and marketed as a comedy or horror, then that's a cheap rip-off. Dialog is cheap. Good, funny dialog (good writers and actors), and SFX are not cheap.

Just like a knockoff, this movie tries to be funny and fails. It tries to make you care (big mistake for comedy-horror), and really falls flat on it's face with bits of drama that are tedious to get through. Special FX are blown away by Sci-fi channel direct to disc releases. The original's SFX were not state-of-the-art all the time (most scenes were though, especially where there's gore), this one the SFX are not even TV-show decent. This would have been forgivable if the movie wasn't so boring in between those few shots. Overall, this is a boring, PG-13 movie that fails in every genre. It's not even so bad that it's funny (I watch some very low-grade B-Movies too). It's better than Thankskilling, but at least TK hit it's intended low mark of humor and quality. I'd put this movie in the same league as Black Swarm or Blood Monkey.

The only reason someone would see this is because of the titular link to the fantastically better movie, or because there's bodacious boobies on the box. Renting this and expecting either of these components to be there even in high dilution will surely disappoint you. If you can catch it for free via streaming when you need a nap, well then it would be good for that.

Lake Victory is a dead place after the tragic events with the invasion of prehistoric flesh-eaters piranhas.

In Cross Lake, Merkin County, the greedy Chet (David Koechner) opens The Big Wet Water Park against the will of his stepdaughter Maddy (Danielle Panabaker). When the van of her friends Travis (Paul James Jordan) and Ashley (Meagan Tandy) is found in the water and the couple is missing, Maddy and her friend Shelby (Katrina Bowden) miss them and they talk on a wooden deck on the lake; out of the blue, they are attacked by piranhas.

Maddy visits the specialist in piranhas Mr. Carl Goodman (Christopher Lloyd) with her former school friend Barry (Matt Bush), who works at The Big Wet, and with her former boyfriend, Deputy Kyle (Chris Zylka), and they discover piranhas in the lake. However Chet refuses to shutdown his water park and soon his costumers are under the attack of the fearful piranhas.

I saw "Piranha 3DD" on DVD and I found it a gross and funny B-Movie, with stupid but hilarious characters. The director knows the B-movie formula, with teats and beautiful girls. Christopher Lloyd has become stereotyped as the mad scientist in American comedies in the end of his career. The uncredited Ving Rhames afraid of the water and shooting with his leg is comical. But David Hasselhoff steals the movie making fun of himself as the most famous lifeguard of all times. If you shutdown your brain, you will certainly enjoy this movie. My vote is six.

Title (Brazil): "Piranha 2" ("Piranha 2")

Well this was a huge disappointment! I really liked the first Piranha 3D film so I was looking forward to this. This is a lazy, lifeless, and pointless sequel that had no business being made. Instead of being so bad it's good like the first film, this one is just so bad it's terrible. For starters, the first Piranha film actually had likable characters and somewhat of a plot to it. This one has the thinest of a plot you can get and the characters are incredibly lifeless and not even the main character serves any purpose to the film at all. You'd think that with this being a sequel they would amp up the gore and deaths, but the deaths in this one are actually tamer than the first and there's actually less of them. The film tries to be much more of a comedy this time around by adding more humor which all of it falls flat. The humor in this film is so awful and outdated thats it's hard to believe anyone over the age of 13 actually wrote this film. But, what really annoyed me about this film is just how damn stupid it is! The writers couldn't even come up with a decent way to get these characters in a situation to set up a death scene and instead have them do something really stupid or come up with a really stupid reason to get them in a situation that sets up a lame death. The acting here (even though it's suppose to be bad) is bad even for a B-Movie. And just when you think you will finally get a payoff after sitting through 55 minutes of crap, the film presents you with a lazy and totally underwhelming climax that is filmed so poorly that most of the time you can't even tell what is going on (And this really sucks because that was the highlight of the first film). And then, the film presents us with an ending so stupid and forced that even those who can suspend their disbelief the most will be left frustrated with just how incredibly stupid the ending is. The film is a short (althought it feels much longer) 70 minutes followed by 11 minutes of credits that include a ton of lame outtakes. I can now see why The Weinstein Company decided to only release this in barely any theaters and just put in on VOD. I still can't believe how bad this movie was. The director John Gulager shouldn't ever be allowed to be involved with a film ever again because this guy can't direct to save his life. Alexandre Aja who directed the first film actually understood the material he was working with. John Gulager had no idea what the hell he was doing and just decided the wip out a POS to make a quick buck because he obviously didn't care about this film at all and just wanted to get paid. As far as the cameo's in the film go, Gary Busey is only in the films opening scene and is wasted (the only thing we get to see him do is light a cow's farts on fire). Ving Rhames cameo doesn't just feel forced, but also is just really pathetic and sad to watch. The only positive things I can say about this film was that David Hasselfhoff's scenes are actually chuckle worthy and there's a lot of gorgeous nude women on screen many times. Even though i'm only giving the film 1/2 a star, that feels generous. This film could've really been a blast and fun just like the first one was, but it really is just an atrocity of a film that not even the biggest fans of the first one will enjoy. If you are looking for a fun B-Movie, go rent Piranha 3D and just forget that this film even exist. Piranha 3DD tries to so self-award of itself that it just ends up being exactly what it's parodying.