Beer League

I'm a huge Howard Stern fan, and I've been excited to see this movie since I first heard Artie talking about it on the Stern show. I was not expecting much out of this movie - just a stupid movie with some good laughs. But this film fell far short of my already very low expectations. There were plot lines within plot lines within plot lines - each one slowing down any kind of flow the movie tried to catch. When the softball part started to get somewhat interesting, the love story would bog it down. Artie tried to do a John Candy and be the farcical yet believable character - but he just did a bunch of Artie-shtick. He really was not able to carry this movie. It was kind of a fun movie, but even the fun scenes such as the bachelor party felt like a drag - clumsily staged and just awkward. Ralph Maccio rocked. Hopefully he will get in more movies from doing this one. The enemy antagonist was good at his role, but it was just too unbelievable. This guy has the best softball team, owns the best gym, AND is running for mayor? All of these different plot lines began to give me a headache and made me look at my watch waiting for the end. There are some good laughs, but we get mostly one liners here. In fairness, I should add that my friend who saw it with me has never listened to the Stern show and liked the movie a lot better than I did. This is a good TV movie or Netflix movie, but I wouldn't recommend seeing it in the theaters.

This movie was funny from beginning to end (and I am not a Howard Stern fan). Everyone has different tastes but after reading some other comments I have to ask one question. What would you expect from an Artie Lange movie!?! This isn't aimed at the Fraser Crain's of the world. It's aimed at normal everyday people who don't take themselves too seriously and don't have to over analyze every movie they see. Yes it's dirty and vulgar and full of penis jokes but it somehow still ends up being a very cute movie. It will win no awards for a suspenseful plot and there were no surprises but I thought the comedic acting was fabulous and the dialog very funny. Basically, if you don't have a stick up your butt you will probably like it and you will have a smile on your face when it's over.

I suppose Artie Lange can be funny at times. It took me a long time to accept him on Howard's show. I wasn't a big fan of Jackie, and it seemed to me that hiring Artie was a step down even then. I thought he had the most annoying laugh, and he was crude and sloppy. I kinda sorta warmed up to Artie after a bit, he said some funny things on the show now and again. I even lol'd when he told his "Bowel Movement" story during the last few weeks of Howard's terrestrial radio tenure. However, I definitely wouldn't consider myself a huge fan.

Now, after seeing this movie, my opinion of Artie has just dropped about 100 levels. This movie is so bad. There were numerous scenes that made me cringe, especially anything that pertained to sex and bodily functions. Oh wait! That would be the entire movie! The plot of this movie is nothing new. How many times can you make the same movie? The "underdog losers" cannot stand the humiliation...decide it's time to win win win!!!! (blahblahblahblah) The dialogue is crude, foul and obnoxious. I can only think of one or two lines that actually made me laugh audibly. Otherwise it was a ridiculous insult to my intelligence. My eyeballs hurt like hell afterward from rolling them so many times.

I love stupid humor. Most of my favorite movies are stupid movies. Having said that, I don't think this movie can even come close to the level of 'stupidy' I have ever witnessed in any any other movie in my entire life. 'Mentally challenged', perhaps!?!?! Thank goodness I got to see it for free! I would have hated myself if I'd actually donated my hard earned money to Artie's coke & Jack habits to watch that garbage.

Oh and by the way, the more popular Italian foods aren't pronounced "gobigole", "galamade", and "mooootzarelle". Say any of those "words" to a real Italian and you'd get slapped like a biatch.

I recommend that you see this movie if you're a bloated, unintelligent, couch-potato, beer-swilling, mid-life crisis case.

Artie Lange is an acquired taste. That is, if you know who he is. Not a marquee name, though definitely a recognizable face, Lange, like Adam Sandler, is the kind of comedian you either love or hate: loud, profane, and politically incorrect. Lange is basically John Belushi reincarnated (it helps that Lange looks enough like Belushi that he could play him in a bio pic). I've been a huge fan of Artie Lange's since the beginning of his career so the critique that follows should be considered pretty biased.

In BEER LEAGUE, Lange plays Artie (what a surprise), a 35-year-old alcohol-loving slacker/loser without a job who still lives with his mother (Laurie Metcalf). His life consists of little else besides attending bars, eating, and playing softball with his buddies. After getting in a fight with the championship team, it is decided by the local police that only one of the teams will be able to remain in the league at the end of the season. What follows is a series of scenes involving non-stop cursing, alcohol consumption, and some softball playing in between.

It goes without saying that BEER LEAGUE doesn't have the strongest plot in the world, which helps get as much nudity, crude jokes, and general tastelessness as one could want from the genre. A good 85% of the jokes succeed. However, there are times when the lack of story really does hurt the film. While never coming across as a one-joke, "Saturday Night Live" (or in Lange's case, "MAD TV") sketch kind of movie, Lange and co-writer/director Frank Sebastiano occasionally seem to find themselves in a trap as to what exactly to do with the picture to move it along plot wise. There's a sub-plot involving Artie's love-interest Linda (the very cute Cara Buono, giving the best performance of anyone in the cast) that gives the raunch-fest an unexpected heart, though despite their chemistry, her character and their relationship is never developed strongly enough for me to give it a higher rating. That said, the romance angle works a lot better here than it did in recent R-rated comedies like WEDDING CRASHERS and 40 YEAR OLD VIRGIN, where it seemed to take the focus away from the main proceedings and in VIRGIN's case, felt extraordinarily fake. BEER LEAGUE is better than both the aforementioned comedies and certainly has more laughs than both combined, but if you aren't a fan of Lange, chances are you'll find yourself disagreeing. For the 18-29 male demographic BEER LEAGUE makes for a great guy flick. 7/10

It's no Gone with the Wind, but I seriously hardly stopped laughing the entire movie!!! Artie is hilarious, and even the Karate Kid turns in an amusing performance. The best comedy I've seen this year. More genuinely funny moments than Talledaga Nights and Click combined!!! The old dude Seymore Cassel steals nearly every scene he's in and is hilarious. Artie really kills playing a character very similar to himself. No need to be a Stern fan to see this movie. Artie steps out of the shadow of the big guy with an incredibly funny and sincere performance. If you want to laugh you butt off this is the movie to see!!!