Death Valley: The Revenge of Bloody Bill

Okay, I like zombie movies. I really do, and I'm willing to forgive a lot when it comes to low budget zombie movies. Especially ones that have their tongue firmly pressed into their cheek. Having said that, I think this may be one of the worst zombie movies to make its way onto the Blockbuster video shelves in a long time (and that's pretty bad, considering there's dreck like "Corpses Are Forever" out there).

It's not worth going into the plot, because there really isn't one.

It's vaguely like From Dusk Till Dawn with zombies, but without the Tarantino dialogue and Rodriguez direction. If you wind up renting this cowpie, look for the best editorial mistake ever. It's toward the middle of the movie, where the black drug dealer (stereotypes anyone?) says something like, "With all due respect, if you can point that gun somewhere else" then... watch for it, he actually mouths the other actor's line. Best part of the movie.

I've waded through lots of zombie movies trying to find some good ones.And since Romero has only made 5 there aren't very many good ones among the loads of stinkers out there.This one was one of the worst pieces of homemade garbage I've seen yet in my quest to find good zombie movies.

A group of what look to be mostly 20 year olds set off in a van on what I think was a going to a trip to a debating contest.Along the way they get hijacked by a dope dealer who is trying to find his partner who has disappeared out in the Arizona landscape somewhere.Anyway the group tracks the dope dealer to a ghost town in the middle of nowhere.Shortly after arriving the kids are attacked by the missing dope dealer who is all bloody and talks kinda funny.

So immediately one of the debaters starts rattling off about the legend of Bloody Bill,a confederate solider ,who ended up out west after the war was over.Legend has it that Bill swore revenge on the town-folk who had killed him for bad stuff he did in the war.How they linked the wounded dope dealer up to Bloody Bill so quick was sort of glossed over and the kid who knew all the details was obviously and painfully reading his lines as we watched flashbacks of how Bill came to be.

Anyway the town soon becomes alive with Bill's zombies who run from one old building to another ,as do the kids,in what sometimes looks like a Benny Hill chase scene without being anywhere near as entertaining.All we needed was "Yakety Sax" as background music.

Speaking of music this film had one,what I took to be,death metal song with idiotic lyrics that was played over and over and over.But really so much was wrong with this film it isn't hardly worth mentioning it all.The zombies were those kind that were just sort of halfway done, no well done zombie make up here. In the flesh eating scenes,which there are very few, we see the cheapo looking rubber stuff instead of the real looking latex standing in for human flesh.In one scene a grenade goes off downstairs but in the shot outside we see the blast and smoke coming out an upstairs window.

One guy runs around and around trying to escape the zombies but all the while keeps one hand on his Kenny Chesney looking cowboy hat to keep from losing it.No one in this film could act their way out of a wet paper bag.The plot and script were terrible and the special effects were as crappy as any I've seen.

In short,this whole mess looks exactly like what it is.....a bunch of lame asses making a zombie movie without one single shred of talent whatsoever.It turns out looking like the homemade junk that it is.

Hey I only paid a buck for this thing at Wal-Mart and I wish I had my dollar back.Yeah it was that bad.

My review for Death Valley: The Revenge Of Bloody Bill? I made it all the way through and it didn't stink. An unusual zombie concept (an old prospector seeking revenge from beyond the grave in a western ghost town) with an engaging score (for those who like death metal), the best thing that can be said is the movie kept me interested. Also, the acting wasn't horrible. But the script was amateurish, the dialogue was weak, the logic (that is, horror movie logic) was uneven and some of the camera shots were way too gimmicky (except for the flashbacks; those were cool). There are a lot of things that could have been done - simple things - to make it a much better movie: i.e, why is it one of the students trapped in the town knows the whole legend about Bloody Bill and yet none of the others, his friends, have even heard of it at all? Also, why does the little "population" count on the town sign keep ticking up after people are killed, but does not tick down for the zombies that have been destroyed? Niggling problems, but bothersome. Still, it was not the worst zombie movie I have ever seen - that distinction goes to House of the Dead, Flesheater, Children of the Living Dead, or Zombie Lake (take your pick).

First and foremost, I worked on the set of Death Valley, so I may be a bit biased. The cast was great to work with for the most part. (There was a primadonna or two, but I won't name names) Byron's got enough experience under his belt now that his camera work is really starting to take off. The editing was fantastic considering I saw the "raw" footage while on set. This was my first production and I now look at movies a totally different way. Richard Miranda (El Intermedio, Way of the Vampire, and Army of Darkness) was superb at bringing the blood and gore of a zombie town to life. The soundtrack was awesome and really brought out the mood of the film. The ending, which I didn't see shot as I was on another portion of the set, was a great surprise. All in all, for the indie horror film world, this was great.

I rented this from Blockbuster because I could get 3 films for 7 nights for £5. The other 2 were Dead End and Black Knight (I wanted to see some cheesy goldmines). Black Knight and Dead End are cheesy goldmines which made me laugh so I thought £5 well spent until I saw this steaming pile! Truly awful! I honestly believe the guy who did this could'nt direct traffic never mind a film. Please no more - you've had your chance. First of all the music was terrible and boring. The opening sequence my girlfriend fell asleep to. The zombies looked terrible. That Chelsea Jean girl was possibly the worst actress ever. The only decent part was watching the awful characters getting picked off. We cheered when they got it. I only gave it a 3 because of the fact it was on for little over an hour which meant I didn't have to suffer for much longer. I'm handing it back to Blockbuster tomorrow where I will complain that it should be them paying me to watch this tripe!