Virgin High

OK, it's got Linnea Quigley in it, and Richard Gabai directed it, so it has to be a T&A movie, and it is. For the most part it's a pretty dull one at that. From the start of the movie to the point that Burt Ward get a holy whatever in is masterfully done. From there until the very end of the movie, when what little plot there is comes to a climax, and Burt Ward gets another good one-liner in, it's pretty dull. On the plus side Traci Dali is drop dead gorgeous, so the scenes she's in are watchable even if the movie is lame. The first five minutes are so funny, I would recommend that any fan of "bad" movies should rent this. It would be worth the rental fee to watch just that much and return it.

Virgin High (obviously rented for the name alone) is one of the most ridiculous and retardedly horrible movies ever created. And that is why I gave it a 10! This movie was incredible easy to mock, and when you watch it with a bunch of friends the movie becomes really funny (although, I admit, the movie does manage to be funny on its own every half an hour). Assuming you don't watch this movie thinking it will be good, it will be good... kind of weird how that works out... Yeah, I also must admit that we watched it twice in a row, which tells you how awful/good it is! Next rental: Hot Under the Collar!

My review was written in January 1991 after watching the film on RCA/Columbia video cassette.

"Virgin High" is uneven but boasts better wrting than most teen sex comedies. Highjinks in a Catholic girls school is familiar territory for video fans.

Linnea Quigley still is surprisingly convincing as by now the oldest living high school student, terrorizing her classmate at Academy of the Blessed Virgin.

Beautiful newcomer Traci Dali is sent there as punishment by her dad Burt Ward (erstwhile Robin on the "Batman" tv series). Her old boyfriend Rcihard Gabai (who also directed) arranges to invade the school disguised as a young priest, precipitating most of the mayhem.

Pic fails as a spoof of Catholic folkways, but Jeff Neill's screenplay includes some witty and fresh material. B-movie regular Michelle Bauer has a disappointing cameo as a substitute teacher, billed with her alternate moniker "Michelle McClellan".

Pic's pace sags a bit in the final reel thanks to an overextended formal dance climax.

You can not dislike a movie akin to this. It has one purpose and that is to make you smile. It does this, although not as much as most would want. There is not much in this movie that you could not find in most eighties teen movies. My favorite moment would have to be the amusing sex scene between the rent a cop Elvis impersonator and Linnea Quigley, which effectively mocks overblown sex scenes. Linnea Quigley is topless in this scene, another reason to love it. Richard Gabai remains horrific in almost every sense. He can't act well and he isn't very funny either, he tries too hard. If he wanted to stay behind the camera, I would have no problem with that. He directed Linnea in several other movies where she was without apparel.

I simply love it, and not because I'm a fan of the lovely Linnea, this movie its just funny, from the opening when Richard tries to look at his girlfrien's assets, to the Guard that impersonates Elvis. I really think that Mr. Gabai is a very talented director and I wish he had made more movies like this or The AAssault of the Party Nerds movies.