If Ever I See You Again

The acting was so-so at best, the direction plodding and the songs sounded like an off key version of "You light up my life." In fact, I thought some of the score was a rip off of that song until learned it was written by the same guy. Perhaps the worst part was the "romantic time together" montage...we see them running, walking on the beach, riding horses on the beach (can you rent horses in LA?), eating, going to the park, etc. etc. It reminded me of a similar scene in the first "Naked Gun" only this was supposed to be serious. It came across as a movie designed to sell a soundtrack...and too often, the soundtrack won.

Saw this movie back in the mid-80's on HBO just as I'd gone to work for a medium-sized advertising agency. The best parts of this film are the ones where Joe Brooks has to pitch his music to clients and deal with them in the recording studio along with their ignorance and complete lack of knowledge. As a jingle writer and producer, Joe knows this dynamic very well, and as portrayed here, it's dead-on - the most accurate and honest part of the film. It's extremely relatable if you're in the advertising business. Joe Brooks probably has a hundred stories that are just as funny and inane as the ones presented here, maybe enough for an entire film. That might wear thin pretty quickly, but it would more entertaining than the bulk of "If Ever I See You Again."

This is indeed "funny": you either LOVE or absolutely HATE this movie: 40 % (!!!) of all viewers indeed give this a (10 (TEN !!) and app. 21, 22 % give this an 1 (AWFUL !), and then there's hardly anybody in between. Ain't that strange ??! (Frankly, I also don't quite get it how it ends up at low 2,8 with such a rating schedule ? shouldn't it have some app. 5-rating then ...???).

Well, I saw this movie some 20 years ago on TV, some Saturday or Sunday matinée viewing and I liked it then (but then again I was a teen in those days). It impressed me enough to buy the 2 LP-set, ordered it from the USA. I have not listened to it also for a decade or more, but I can still remember the song well enough, since I played it A LOT then.

Now I wonder, should I see it again and I guess, probably not. Older and of course more cynical today then 20 years ago I would probably also give it a lower rating and why spoil an old memory ? :-) I don't rate it, 'cause my opinion is not warrant anymore after such a long time since seeing it, but it was nice and it is probably one that one should see when being young ...

I believe I've enjoyed this movie more than any other love story that was never promoted. I wish J. Brooks would write,direct, and act in more movies. By the way, I thought the music was exceptional considering that I had never heard any of them before. This ranks as a "10" in my book.

It's too bad, too, because the idea had a lot of potential. It just needed a better script, better songs, actors who could actually act and a director who knew what he was doing.

Mostly though, this movie is an exercise of ego for one Joe Brooks. He directs, he acts, he sings, he produces. Presumably, he also cast Shelley Hack, whose last name pretty much sums up the state of her acting ability, in the lead female role.

Where to start? The acting, if it can be called that, is an abomination. Shelley Hack is leaden and Joe would be lucky to be so good. He plays a jingle writer who aspires to greater things. Judging from the music, he's found his niche with jingles. It has a certain Barry Manilow light quality to it. Imagine hell being trapped in an elevator for all eternity with muzak playing Joe Brooks greatest hits, and you'll begin to get a taste for just how bad it gets.

Especially when Joe starts to sing. When Joe made "You Light Up My Life," the first decision he made was to dub Didi Cohn's voice with Debbie Boone's. Would that he showed as much sense here. Somewhere out there, cats start to howl when Joe sings.

The bottom line, watch if you must, but remember to bring a book to read. It's two hours of your life you'll never get back