Zontar: The Thing from Venus

Dreadful remake of a B picture called It Conquered the World made by Roger Corman and starring Beverly Garland. This version has the king of Z's Larry Buchanan directing and a tired looking John Agar starring. Agar is in fact the only cast member that might be accused of being or having been a thespian. He also looks like he is just able to keep his composure every time he says the word Zontar or looks at a lobster-like bat alien "flying" around. Just like in the It Conquered the World, a man has contacted an alien from Venus who uses the human as a means to secure knowledge so that it can come to Earth and begin to control it. Much of the plot is the same as Buchanan had agreed to remake some of the old AIP films(like he did with The Eye Creatures - a blatant remake of Invasion of the Saucermen). I like the old, cheesy Corman film. It had heart amidst no budget, and it had talent in Corman and Garland. I even learned to like the absurd triangle, down-to-the-ground Venusian. But this film doesn't have any of that same magic. Buchanan isn't the worst director in the world, but he just isn't very good either. This movie is so cheap that nothing looks like any real care or money went into it. That is patently obvious when you see the horrid acting by all concerned except Agar who is just reasonable at best. Tony Huston as Keith Ritchie, the man responsible for bringing Zontar to our planet, is easily the worst. Nothing he says has any conviction to it whatsoever. Susan Bjurman plays his wife and is just as awful. How about the scene where she she says she didn't want to marry a monster. I was crying from laughter - not the kind of laughs that were meant to be intentional. Buchanan DOES try for laughs here and there with some soldiers, but the humour is real lame and tired material. Special effects? I mentioned the most dazzling already -- alien "bats" that look like flying lobsters and unconvincingly land on the back of necks. The other primary special effect is the alien itself, and I will be completely honest when I say that I much prefer the alien from It Conquered the World for its comparative creativity and realism. If you have seen that film, then you know just how bad it must be in this one. This film stinks to be sure but is full of great laughs in a not-in-good way. Just listen to the dialog, "This will take a second" says Huston, Agar, with as stoic a face as possible, returns and says, "I have a second." Most of the dialog is filled with similar creative juices.

I guess when John Agar came to Hollywood, they thought he was going to be the next Cary Grant. So what does he end up doing: cheap monster movies. He was adequate as the doctor in "Tarantula." In this one, he must be embarrassed. He is so stiff and must act opposite dreadful people. The mad scientist who makes contact with Zontar is about as emotive and unappealing as one can get. His wife is even worse. Don't try to think about the believability of all this because it absolutely defies even the most primitive logic. Who are these people and why are they so important? How do you get Venus on an old time radio? They even refer to it as a "set." Zontar is, himself, just an ugly bat guy. Of course, fortunately, the scientist just happens to own a "ruby plutonium laser gun" which is the one thing that can kill Zontar. If he's that nutty about the good intentions of the alien, why does he have this? Did he build it? Don't ask. I did love the arguments between the guy and his wife, but that's because it's the most dreadful acting one has ever seen.

Zontar, the Thing from Venus (1966)

* (out of 4)

Incredibly bad science fiction film has an alien attaching itself to a scientist in hopes of taking over the world. Will it or will John Agar save the day? This thing has a pretty big cult following but I can't see why. The film is just downright bad without any of the laughs that usually come from these types of films. Poor acting, poor special effects and just an overall poor movie. I'm sure some kids enjoyed this when they watched it on television back in the day but nothing in it holds up today. This film belong in Uranus, not Venus.

The reason for this film's existence is that with the advent of colour TV viewers ceased being choosy about what to watch as long as it was in colour.

Hence this quickie remake of 'It Conquered the World' starring 'B' movie mainstay John Agar and our old friend Bronson Caverns under the alias "the old Hot Springs Cave", which if memory serves follows the plot of the original pretty closely since the producers were obviously too cheap to come up with a new plot, as evidenced by Agar riding a bicycle rather than drive a car on the pretext - it says here - that all terrestrial power has been neutralised; while the military attribute the strange occurrences to "some kind of communist conspiracy"

It certainly is bad - with the cool name 'Zontar' promising something rather more impressive than the enormous boggle-eyed bat that we actually see - but the addition of colour gives it a glossier look with John Agar wearing a sharp suit and the ladies in chic sixties hairstyles; while the employment of negative printing (SLIGHT SPOILER COMING:) embellishes a couple of shots near the end.

The best part of the movie is knowing it was filmed in Dallas in 1966. Actually, the exterior shots of the scientist's headquarters were filmed at my childhood home in Dallas -- it was quite contemporary for its time. One Sunday morning the producers knocked on the door wanting to use our home, we consented, and 2 days of muddy footprints and dirty coffee mugs later, the actors and filmmakers left. We enjoy watching the familiar scenes shot at White Rock Creek and Casa Linda Shopping Center -- particularly the mass chaos scenes of a running mob. Not a great plot and especially bad props -- Zontar looks like a black plastic bag stuck on a wire that flaps in the air.