Chrome and Hot Leather

Sad but true, this double feature of CHROME AND HOT LEATHER plus GOD FORGIVES, I DON'T was a crowded night of goggle eyed teen adventure (I secretly went without mum and dad knowing) and saw it in 1971 at Sydney's home of the crap double feature The Capitol Theatre. Lots of customers there that Saturday night, plenty of couples (I wonder what the girlfriends thought) and me and my pals scoffing lollies and staring at the screen. One memorable scene in CHROME was a bikie being stopped by a cop on a rural road. The cop comes over and we all expect him to harass the bikie. Instead the cop shows what a nice guy he was by telling the bikie how much he liked his bike, admiring those hot chrome exhaust pipes..... I do not know if a sex scene followed and was edited out, but today that would play like a pick up to raucous laughter. GOD FORGIVES I DON'T was a terrible Italian or Spanish western with Terence Hill. However we all went home satisfied. Cost 70c I remember. The 70s were such fun.

I saw this movie today on cable. I enjoyed the beginning of the movie and up to the part where the three Green Berets rescue their friend from the bikers. After that, it became pretty obvious that the movie was quickly going down hill. All the army equipment scenes were pretty cheesy. I never saw LAAW rockets used in the manner the Berets used them here. Why, if someone is shooting off rockets and mortar rounds, would the biker gang not leave the valley the minute the rocket blasts started. My favorite biker movie is MAD MAX. Now that was a mean biker gang.

Lee Frost was a capable and half-way decent director and cinematographer, I guess. He has a catalog of work from the 60s and 70s, such titles (and such titles I've yet to see the movies of) that includes Zero in and Scream, Mondo Bizarro, Nazi Love Camp and The Black Gestapo. I don't know if having such a catalog of work and a halfway decent eye as a DoP meant he made good movies. Probably not entirely the case. But Chrome and Hot Leather, aside from its hard-knock-awesome title, has a few things going for it. For one thing its star, the Lieutenant who returns from Vietnam to discover that his girlfriend was run off the road by a hothead member of a biker gang called the Beards (?), has a hard-jaw face and voice that's like a knock-off of Sterling Hayden. It's also got a likable-cum-sleazy cast of biker folk who get drunk, arm wrestle and sometimes have some group sex. Not that you see too much of it, of course, since it's PG-13 (at least today, maybe it was G-rated back then, who knows).

But the few things going for it, which also, I should add, includes an absolutely hilarious climactic battle where the Lieutenant and his army buddies take a whole lot of ammo and bombs and bullets to the bikers just to, you know, scare them and get them loaded with gas that the ex-Vientam guys need gasmasks for (!), are not enough to make it something you should rush out to see. Even if you're into trashy biker movies from the 60s and 70s, such as I am in that true-blue guilty pleasure kind of way, it's something to see further down the pike, preferably on the double-bill I viewed it with, the Mini-Skirt Mob. It's got a plot that's got enough meat on it to keep things a little interesting, even as the acting is sewer-tastic and the final showdown between the Lieutenant and the (accidental?) killer of his girlfriend is underwhelming to say the least. But, yet, Lee Frost puts in little moments, like one particular line by a biker in a bar about harassing someone, and seeing how the soldiers hilariously train on their newly purchased Kawasakis. You'd think they were getting ready for a reenactment of the video-game Excitebike as opposed to seeking vengeance on a bunch of dopes.

I must say, here was a bikie flick that really disappointed me. It's the most disappointing bikie flick I've seen in my life, when I first saw it at the tender age of fifteen. The title is fantastic and the cover was so appealing, but appearances can be deceiving. How can such a great titled movie represent such a dull film? Just watch Chrome And Hot Leather. Now some people may think I'm quite hard on this. Let me give you the rundown here. It has a good story/revenge premise of an ex green beret and his mob avenging a vicious gang of bikers, who've killed his fiancée. No surprise the lead bikie here is played by William Smith from The Losers, another bikie film, who came close to this on disappointed me, in it's first view, some shades of familiarity between the two as well. The Losers had a couple of men in berets too. Why you may ask this film doesn't work. In the violence and action department, it's remarkably restrained, and there's a lot of nothing happening moments, where the end is really when the movie perks. It's just flat, with nothing happening-ness. If judging the cover too, the movie looked more recent like eighties. We did have that rush of revenge running through our veins to see this beret to kick arse, only there wasn't enough kicking arse. Too much waiting around. We needed many more emotionally charged, and anger driven moments, that required more plot points, or even turning points. Trivia note. The lead beret, and other actor Peter Brown both starred in Rape Squad as very bad guys/rapists. And again, my true thoughts here: someone should rape this movie, before it's hired out again.

CHROME AND HOT LEATHER contains more biker mayhem perpetrated by folks who kinda, sorta look like actual bikers.

A motorcycle gang called THE WIZARDS are peeved when two women in a car accidentally knock one of them off their bike. This is a no-no, and costs the women dearly.

Enter Mitch (Tony Young) a Green Beret / Vietnam Vet, and fiance of one of the victims. Mitch is none too pleased and seeks satisfaction. Packed with action and early-1970's ambiance, CHROME is one of the better films of its sub-genre.

William Smith is really good as T. J. the leader of THE WIZARDS, and so is music legend Marvin Gaye as one of Mitch's Green Beret pals...