Bridegroom

I'm old. I'm not young like Tom and Shane. I'm fat and homely; I'm not fit and beautiful like Tom and Shane. I've never been to Egypt or Paris or Machu Picchu or any of the other marvelous places they went together. I've never been in love, never had a serious lover or a husband or a partner or a relationship anything like theirs. I've lived alone all my life.

I tend to envy and resent people who have what I don't have; so what surprises more than any of you can know is that I'm not jealous of them, at all. I don't resent their youth or their beauty or their passion or their happiness or the adventures they shared or the delight they had in each other.

From my point of view, their story is a beautiful story of REAL love, of a blessed life, a holy life together that very, very, VERY few people ever know - maybe one in a hundred million, if even that many.

At my age I tend to see things long term, not because I'm wise but only because I'm old. I can't help it. When I look at things I see them in the context of centuries, not years. So when I look at Tom and Shane I don't see tragedy; I don't see injustice; I don't see the hateful, ignorant, fearful cruelty in some of the people around them.

Like it or not, those things are ephemeral. They don't last forever. LOVE lasts forever. Joy lasts forever. Beauty lasts forever. What Shane and Tom had will last forever, because, folks, Tom is not dead in any way that matters.

Bodies die, but the persons who live in the bodies never die. Tom is as real and as alive now as he was when Shane kissed him in front of the Eiffel Tower. He left here early, but a thousand years from now that won't matter at all, because they'll have been back together a lot longer than they were apart. That's the wonderful gift this movie gives to anyone who can receive it.

Still brings tears to my eyes thinking about Shane and knowing he's somewhere out there today still filled with discomfort in the loss of his best friend and companion. Very emotional and hard to wrap your head around just how intense of an emotion that would be to endure. The message is conveyed very well, and the majority of the film is just building up to a very strong climax. At the turn of events the film becomes very emotional and a strong tear jerker.

Over-all the movie is A++ but hard to watch because it is very very sad! I have seen many fictional romance movies with sad endings, but when the story is true, it can really take to heart just how powerful a story Shane has to share.

For a while, I felt interested but a bit removed. Certainly the story is tragic, but there are so many tragic tales in the world. Certainly any homophobia is horrific, but when there are still gay men being lynched, this story seemed not nearly as dramatic and shocking as others. And its style is basic – talking head interviews with friends and family, home videos, photographs.

I thought (in my smug liberal way) that its good for the country to see a film showing how normal, likable and in love two young men could be. But this wasn't news to me. It felt rudimentary, aimed at those who had never known a gay couple and realized 'hey, they're just people'.

But then something strange happened. In the film's last half hour it built into an emotional tidal wave. I didn't realize I was hit until I suddenly started to cry. These two men were so deeply, sweetly in love, and Shane Crone, rather than simply crawl into a shell after the untimely death of the love of his life, and after being barred from the funeral by the homophobic family, and dealt many other emotional (and legal) cuts and bruises only because he and his life partner were gay, managed to rally himself, and make a you tube video that has reached millions with an impossible to argue with plea for gay marriage. That he could take this devastating loss, add mistreatment, and instead of giving up on life do something important and life affirming was profoundly affecting. Suddenly the whole film seemed to have more weight. I wept through the very moving responses his video (the one that got me is a self proclaimed life-long redneck, vowing to never oppose gay lovers again). Even the end credits full of thousands of names of those who cared enough to contribute to the Kickstarter campaign for the film moved me with joy for the resilience of human beings, the fact that things are getting better, and that love is still the most powerful thing in the human experience, both in personal and political terms.

I watched Bridegroom tonight in Netflix. I have to admit I cried my eyes out. I highly recommend everyone to watch this documentary. Toms and Shanes love is so pure you can just see it through their videos and photos. Its the type of love that everyone wants. Hopefully this documentary will open up the eyes and the hearts of many people and they will learn to accept who they are and who their friends and family members are. Doesn't matter if you are gay or straight. Life is too short. Love the people that love you back and enjoy your life. Get a camera and record all your amazing moments. Thank you Shane and Tom for showing the world what true love is like.

Finally found the time to watch this. Anyone would be incredibly lucky to share the love that these two people have for one another. The documentary follows a touching love story while displaying the current imbalance of rights and freedom in our world and how it affects the underprivileged. Gay people already know and live these stories. It's meant to change the hearts and minds of straight privileged people who aren't necessarily paying enough attention or who haven't yet been exposed to such realities like the ones shown in the story of Bridegroom. Take an hour out of your day and watch it; it's very worthwhile.