Dallas Connection

This flic will be remembered as a classic for the some of the funniest dead-pan dialogue and gratuitous shots of T&A to fill one of the most absurd plots since "Gymkata". From the asteroid showers, to the extended shower scenes, to the blow-up doll decoy, to the awkward reactions to the horse race which obviously isn't taking place, this movie never stops entertaining.

It stays perfectly on the line between over-the-top farce while appearing to try to be a "real" film, in true Ed Wood fashion. It's amusing to read the comments of disappointed viewers who attempted to derive substance from this B-movie. This is one to watch late night on cable, preferably with some good friends and a keg.

This film begins with an attractive woman who goes by the nickname of "Black Widow" (Julie Strain) seducing a French scientist and then killing him in his apartment bedroom. The scene then shifts to South Africa where another scientist is killed by a pretty blonde assassin known only as "Cobra" (Julie K. Smith). Not long afterward, yet another scientist is killed in Hong Kong by a female assassin who goes by the name of "Scorpion" (Wendy Hamilton). As might be expected, since these three scientists were all working together on an international project of great importance, federal agents are quickly dispatched to Dallas in order to protect the only scientist left from the original group. The problem is that the agency hired to protect him has been compromised, and the team of assassins know exactly where to find the remaining scientist and all of the information he has available to him. Now, rather than reveal any more, I will just say that this film had an interesting plot and featured a number of attractive actresses like Samantha Phillips (as "Samantha Maxx") along with both Julie Strain and Julie K. Smith to enhance the scenery. Unfortunately, it wasn't quite enough as the script was rather basic and the acting could have used some improvement as well. In short, this was a typical Andy Sidaris production and I have rated it accordingly. Slightly below average.

There is one name today in the realm of B style soft core skin flicks and that is Sidaris. This is the kind of movie that if you saw it when you were 13, you wouldn't leave your room for a week. This movie knows it is an exploitation flick and doesn't take itself too seriously. It is actually fun to watch as more than just a parade of large breasts. Of course, there is a strip club sequence that is tough to forget. I wouldn't rent this one, but it kept me awake on cable.

The Dallas Connection is one of the later films from Andy Sidaris. Well, strictly speaking, this one was actually directed by his son Drew and produced by Andy. But you would be doing better than me if you noticed any difference because no matter who directed this one, it's exactly the same as all the others that go under the Sidaris name. Like the rest, this one is an action flick that relies very heavily on beautiful large breasted women who lose their clothes on a regular basis. Without the ladies, most of Sidaris films would be hopeless and this one is no exception.

Its story really isn't worth describing, except to say that it revolves around a trio of professional female killers called Black Widow, Cobra and Scorpion. These femme fatales are played by Julie Strain, Julie K. Smith and Wendy Hamilton. Fortunately, all of them disrobe frequently to frolic about in, amongst other places the shower and a strip club. Julie Strain seduces a restrained man in dominatrix PVC gear in a standout moment but best of all is the truly mesmerizingly sexy Julie K. Smith frolicking around in a hot tub with some lucky 'victim'. Its soft-core erotica basically but with a very high calibre of eye candy. Aside from this the plot-line plods along in an uninspired way, although there are some agreeably stupid moments like death by exploding golf ball and the ludicrous blow-up doll scene. My advice would be to watch it for the ladies and tolerate the rest.

Excellent for what it intends Colorful, nice costumes for the girls. Good looking guys.

Rigid cardboard acting, but in an amusing way.

Jet skis, motor boats, nice pacing, great explosions that would rival Hollywood (unlike todays computer generated b movie explosions), fun characters, nice variety in the women (and cute!), and on.

I wouldn't say it lacks action. Just trends more to spy and espionage intrigue. In a goofy way of course.

Imdb/amazon...stop with the 600 character review minimum. B movies dont require a New York Times review.

Imdb/amazon...stop with the 600 character review minimum. B movies dont require a New York Times review.

Very entertaining.