Batman & Robin

Batman & Robin, the big summer movie of 1997, I remember seeing this in the theater when I was 12 and even then I wasn't impressed. But when I was more grown up, I watched this film again, I figured since I loved the 3 previous Batman films, why not give this one another shot? Now, seeing this movie once again, I can understand the low rating on IMDb, this movie was just a pathetic attempt at merchandising Batman and making an over the top action movie that really had nothing to do with Batman. The casting was just oh, so plain wrong. We have Arnold Schwartzenegger as Dr. Freeze?! Not to mention the accent, the character was just someone you felt like you could laugh off. Alicia Silverstone as Batgirl, she was alright, but again, questionable casting since she seemed out of place. Now, George Clooney?! I couldn't believe how Val Kilmer got complained about, but George Clooney I can see why. He was just the most awkward Batman ever and didn't fit the role at all, he was only used for his popularity.

Batman is living it up with his bachelor lifestyle, but Robin is a bit upset that he is living under Batman's shadow and wishes to be the star. Alfred is becoming very sick and needs serious help; his niece, Barbara comes to his aid and hopes to help him and stays with Bruce Wayne. Dr. Freeze is our new villain and is looking for a cure for his wife who is frozen until he can find a cure for her, he also is intending for the world to pay for what has happened to him and his wife for some reason. Dr. Pamela Isley is a plant scientist/right activist and while her boss sees her finding out more than she needs to know about an experiment on his version of Frankenstien, named Bang, he "kills" her with her plants. But the plants chemicals have an effect on her and actually make her into Poisen Ivy. She and Freeze team up to take over Gothem and of course to split Batman and Robin forever, oh yeah, then kill them I guess.

Batman & Robin was really beyond over the top, the costumes were a bit silly and the story was just too family friendly. This is Batman, the Dark Knight, it's not meant to be this bright and so crazy. I couldn't believe Joel did this, I really wish I could get past this, I know he's going to get a bad rap for this film for the rest of his career. The acting was just stupid and not true to Batman at all. The problem here was that the story and setting just had nothing to do with what Batman truly is and was just an excuse to spend stupid money. Please, don't watch this film if you love Batman, or you'll be sorry.

2/10

Back in the day, I felt disappointed when I watched it in theaters and I really disliked the movie for many reasons: it wasn't dark like the first two (same thing for "Foverer"), the dialogues ("chicks dig the car") the over-the-top silly acting, the props (batmobile, suits, weapons, etc), the goofy villains... However I loved the color palette and cinematography - it's pure Schumacher of course.

Over the years I have watched it again several times and when the BluRay came out I watched it more in depth and finally it happened: I like the movie now. Why? How? Well, nowadays I feel like I'm watching a "modern" take on the 60's TV series and it really makes sense to me for the very same elements I mentioned before: goofy villains, lots of colors, over-the-top cheesy acting, family-friendly overall tone. Gradually I started enjoying the movie in this context and I can say that I like it for what it is.

Unfortunately, this was the latest entry in the "comic-style" franchise.

Don't get me wrong, the old Adam West Batman TV show was certainly funny, and given the times, a more accurate representation of what Batman was trying to be wouldn't have succeeded nearly as well. But the show still betrayed all the emotion and grimness of Batman's themes.

In Batman & Robin, Schumacher seems to be getting back to those roots. He treats the entire Batman franchise like a joke. Even if it was funny, this would be betraying the name of Batman. But here, seeing as it's NOT funny, it only succeeds in becoming the worst of the Batman movies, and, arguably, the worst films ever created. And I'm taking into account Plan 9 From Outer Space, Gigli, and You Got Served.

George Clooney just plays George Clooney. Which is the road he usually takes, but this suave, dashing, and charming Batman seems more like Mystery Men's Captain Amazing than the crimefighter of legend.

There's Chris O'Donnell, the angst-ridden Robin trying to break out of Batman's shadow. The only thing he ever really does is act like a child.

Alicia Silverstone. Wow. I seriously wonder what makes someone say, "Hmm, who should we get to play Batgirl . . . I know! Alicia Silverstone!" No offense to Alicia, but she's out in right field on this one. Her tough-girl performance is sprinkled with reminders of her Clueless days. But all that aside, she actually does very little.

Now, onto the villains. Uma Thurman, who we know CAN act, is hamming it up to ridiculous proportions. First, when she's playing the nerdy Dr. Pamela, she exaggerates that to a level I thought impossible. And then she inexplicably turns into an extremely sexualized villainess whose plan, by the way, would kill all the plants she advocated protecting.

Arnold seems like the worst possible choice for Mr. Freeze. I mean, of all the Batman villains I could see him playing - Bane, for christ's sake - Mr. Freeze is not on that list. He possesses none of the emotionless, calculated, and cold (no pun intended) sociopathy which makes Mr. Freeze such a good character.

And then, all that aside, they're handed ridiculous catch phrases and cliches they're expected to say with any level of sincerity? At one point Mr. Freeze says "chill out." Of all the ways it sounds, menacing is not among them.

Seriously, I'd have more respect for Schumacher if I discovered that he hated Batman, and had intentionally ruined it with this garbage. Then, this might actually be just his own personal joke. Instead, it borders on a travesty of good cinema. I only wish that 0 stars was a selectable option at the imdb, for this film ALONE.

Strangely enough, that's one ice-related pun that Mr.Freeze doesn't use in this film. Though it does adequately describe the movie. What was I thinking, watching Batman & Robin for a third time? Even worse, what was I doing actually starting to enjoy it?

Yes, there's something endearingly awful about a film that fails on almost every technical level. But it wasn't always so. The first two films in the franchise, anchored by the strong, and much undervalued lead of Michael Keaton, were enjoyable pop-art excursions by Tim Burton. The first, still by far the best, allowed Jack Nicholson to ham it up amongst retro stylings and the music of Prince. The second, Batman Returns, was a less successful effort to homage German expressionist cinema, the darkest of the four films, and struggled slightly under the weight of three villains.

The lesson wasn't learnt, and the usage of multiple baddies has been a fixed staple ever since. With the third, Batman Forever, the flat acting of new bat Val Kilmer was coupled with Joel Schumacher's garish direction and Chris O'Donnell's irritating Robin. Akiva Goldsman was now the writer, and any sense of depth had given way to trite puns and disjointed set pieces.

And so it was that everything that was symptomatically flawed with the series was expanded upon and magnified for the fourth, and by far the weakest, instalment. George Clooney has accepted a lot of the blame for this film, a humble admission but unfair. While he's clearly miscast as both Batman and Bruce Wayne, he doesn't give a bad performance per se. Rather, it's his back up that lets the side down. Uma Thurman (am I the only one who doesn't think she's that good-looking?) has a great time overdoing it as Poison Ivy, but she's joined by Arnold Schwarzenegger as Mr. Freeze. Schwarz, not exactly known for his acting skill, is unrecognisable under his costume, so what's the point? He gets to call Batman "Batunbuuurg", refers to Robin as "Buuurd Bouy" and only has 100 lines in total. The fact that 26% of these lines are lame puns on the word "ice" that even a two-year-old would struggle to find funny is even more deplorable. And when you hear Freeze tell Batman "Yew arr not zending mee too da cooola" the urge to use the video's "stop" button is almost insurmountable.

Bane makes up the trio, a monosyllabic muscleman in a gimp mask. A completely unnecessary addition, he offers nothing to the plot and goes largely forgotten. The introduction of wonky-mouthed Alicia Silverstone as a fatuous Batgirl character is also grating. And why doesn't her costume come fitted with Batnipples like the rest?

Tiny traces of amusement can be gleaned from Ivy's dialogue, with her urges that her "garden needs tending" adding some form of adult tone to the humour. However, it's unrelenting innuendo - "I'll help you grab your rocks" - does start to wear thin very quickly. I did smile at Batman's cashcard: "I never leave the cave without it"; and it's also nice to see some small references from other films. Even if it is just a glimpse of the Riddler's costume from Forever, some guards paraphrasing Cobra or some street bystanders dressed as Clockwork Orange Droogs. In fact, the idea of a Batman film as completely OTT comedy send-up may have worked, were the rest of the humour more sophisticated. "It's the hockey team from Hell"; "So this is where you hang out"; "I'll cancel the pizza"; oh, how lame and functional the dialogue is!

The film wraps up with a rather pathetic plot contrivance, and George having to dish out bland platitudes. "Not all heroes wear masks"; "to give life... that's true power". Oh, it really is abominably bad. Batman & Robin exists as a classic example of the Hollywood system folding in under its own weight. However, the universal slating this one got neglects one factor: while the least successful, it still made over $230,000,000 at the box office. I wonder how many people would be satisfied with "failures" like that?

I won't try and argue with anyone that says this movie is bad. It has a horrific script rife with far too many moments more interested in selling action figures than making sense. Arnold puts in the most camp performance as Mr. Freeze possibly ever that almost completely ruins what should be one of the most dramatic characters in the Batman lore.

George Clooney as Bruce Wayne isn't believable, Chris O'Donnell's Robin feels old and tired at this point after his kind of fresh feeling introduction in Batman Forever, the effects seem cheap and theme parkish (probably didn't help that Six Flags was really pushing live shows based on these movies back then) and so on and so forth.

If you were looking for a serious Batman movie, this totally missed the mark.

But what if, what if we just misunderstood what this movie was trying to do? What if the campiness, cheesiness, and ridiculousness was the entire point. What if instead of expecting The Dark Knight we should have been expecting Sharknado? Does it have any appeal as an expensive B movie satire?

In my opinion, it does. This movie is a BLAST to watch from the perspective that it's to be made fun of. Arnold Schwarzenegger's one liners become almost iconic when viewed from the lense of "what would be the dumbest, corniest, thing that could happen right now in this scene." Uma Thurman's over the top cringe worthy Poison Ivy is actually hilarious when you know what this actress is actually capable of when she's given a good role to work with. Bane looking something like a theme park mascot is impossible to take seriously when you've seen later, more serious versions of the character.

In short, for 1997 when this movie came out, and for a variety of marketing reasons, people didn't get that this movie was supposed to be a joke. People still had Tim Burton's Batman movies in their head they weren't expecting to go full Adam West.

That's a definite failure of the movie, to fail to make sure the audience understood what you were trying to do. But I think, 20 years later we can finally look back on this movie as being misunderstood in its time. It's suffered I think more than enough for the crime of being a joke that no one got. I think it's time people tried for a moment to rethink what this movie was.

If you still think this movie was the worst thing ever even after I've said my piece, I'm still not going to argue with you. I'm just going to smile as I agree with you.