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One late Friday night/morning in the blistering Australian summer, I found myself unable to sleep and with nothing to do besides willing on a cold front, I turned on my T.V and found a film called 'Fatal Pursuit'. With my only other option being a Chuck Norris informercial, i settled in and watched quite possibly the worst movie i've ever seen (although 'Overboard' still holds that mighty crown). There is no intelligent way to describe how bad the film is, so i'll simply say this: It Sucks. It Just plain Sucks. The only possible reasons for watching this film are: the main Character's moustache, the big chin guy from Tango & Cash, and the refreshingly large amount of full body female nudity. Chuck Norris' Total Gym never looked better.

Fatal Pursuit is a poorly executed attempt at the erotic thriller genre. While suffering a number of faults it is primarily undermined by it's script.

Gang boss Bechtal (Malcolm McDowell), his moll Giselle (Lydie Dernier) and muscle Franco (Robert Z'Dar) steal $8 million in diamonds in a violent New Orleans kidnapping/robbery. British insurer Pinkrose (Michael Ensign) sends in Jill (Shannon Whirry) to investigate. She is teamed with local "good old boy" private investigator Deghy (L.P. Brown 111) and his sidekick Herbert (Charles Napier). They trace a witness to the crime through bad cops (Larry Manetti as Gersi), good cops (Obba Babatunde as Trindad, Joe Estevez as Morier) and subsequent witness Shelby (Larry Linville). Regarding the latter, Major Frank Burns in the MASH TV series, I should just note that this was his second to last credit before passing away. RIP.

L.P. Brown is believable as a "bad boy" private investigator and, as a co-producer of the movie, seems to have made sure he gets the best one liners. Unfortunately this leaves less for the other characters. This is especially notable with Shannon Whirry, who starts out with a reasonably strong and independent character but, through the script, ebbs into the "girl" in awe of our "hero". Charles Napier looks ready to have some fun, of course with that grin when didn't he look like he was ready for some fun, but the script leaves him nothing to do. Malcolm McDowell career has unfortunately descended into playing villains in B movies. The best that can be said here is that he's energetic, the man can snarl with intensity, but unfortunately that is all the performance entails. Lydie Dernier' s character is described or seen as "on the street" (prostitute?), thief, gangster's moll, killer and tourist shop operator. No wonder she just decided to play it as psycho. Robert Z'Dar has physical presence but isn't called on to do much (acting wise).

Once the romantic antagonism between Deghy and Jill peters out there isn't anything left but the plot. It would be unfair to say there is no plot; there is one and within its own context it is logical. The problem is that the plot is fundamentally stupid. First there is the witness to the jewel theft. Then there is the witness to the death of the first witness. It is nothing but coincidences related to the gangsters' amazing proclivity to leave witnesses. You've just killed a couple of people, stolen $8 million in diamonds and then you just glare at the witness and walk off! As for the erotic I would say that Shannon Whirry' s shower scene more than makes up for the fact that her British accent keeps coming and going. If they had expanded that to ninety minutes and cut the rest of the film we might have to revise our vote to 9 out of 10.

On the positive side the movie has a few good one liners, initial romantic tension between the leads and it moves along. It may make passable viewing for viewers in a non-demanding frame of mind. However I honestly couldn't understand why people just don't rent The Big Easy instead (same ambiance much more successfully executed).

Given that the user reviews for this film were so nose in the air, I was compelled to give the film a higher rating than it really deserves. (Forgive me Father.) Let's not make any bones about it; this is one of those run-of-the-mill, get it off-quick-on direct video (now DVD) action films, the kind you forget soon after watching. You can't expect anything special from such a film. So let me accent the positives, particularly after fellow reviewers have gone so far as to rate this among the worst films ever. (Yes, the sound you heard WAS a groan from the spirit of the Marquis of Queensbury.) I loved the relationship between our heroine and the hero. They obviously went all out to provide a study in contrasts, he a beer drinking slob from the Big Easy, and she a stuffy British bird who is not easy at all. And it worked! I wasn't familiar with the actress; I noticed in her listings she is something of a "B" queen, and I greatly appreciated her showing her wares (the film's dialogue comments, after she gets drunk and our hero brings her to bed unconscious, that she is a "10," and that not far from the truth. ((Those who might lecherously ask, "What, me Whirry?"... the answer would be a resounding "yes.")) By the way, let me jump ahead and provide another reason why I liked this film... it broke the rules, in this scene. Normally, the hero would be too much of a gentleman to take advantage of a lady in this state of stupor, but our cad of a hero actually did! I thought they were kidding, and at the end it was going to be one of those, "naw, I was a good boy" sort of thing, but that was positively ground-breaking..! Certainly only wonderful in movie terms; in real life we'd be talking downright contemptible, date-rape without question. She actually tells him, once she wakes up in the morning and over the phone, "I hope you used a condom." And her character was meant to be uncool!) So I loved this relationship. And our hero... whom I see from his listing has a tendency to cast himself, as the producer of many of his own vehicles... looked like a real hunk a' man as we used to appreciate in the old days, good manly build (in a natural way, without the superficial buff) hairy chest and all. And even though he was a rapist, there was a soft side to him, not one of those clichéd and boring heroes we would expect in a film like this. There were a lot of wonderful and clever lines in the film, I guess not too memorable as I can't think of an example now, but as I was watching, I thought to myself, hey. That was kind of witty! So the writing gets a plus... kind of. The plot? Well, what do you want. It moved. It's not boring. What do you want, for Pete's sake?

I'll tell you what else I liked. (Man, my glass is hopelessly half full compared to the other reviewers, thus far; theirs barely had a drop.) I love these B-movies that fill up the cast with familiar faces. I mean, Robert Z'Dar? Charles Napier? (At 62, a swinger with the chicks. This movie may not exactly rule, but it breaks the rules, I tell you!) And Larry Linville, an old guy here, but still getting it on with the lovely lasses. Again, not conforming to the rules of our youth-oriented society... yes, men still have sex after forty. (Women? Not in too many movies, alas, especially not this one. Okay, there are limits to the rule-breakings.) Malcolm McDowell can walk through the kind of evil boss role that he plays here, but he does a great job. Even if he's walking through it. His hopelessly young girlfriend (there's a trend here with the older men getting it on with the beautiful young women, yes I spotted it) is a kind of psycho, which is almost a cliché, but still kind of fun. We even get the obligatory twist ending... well, not quite a "twist," but you know how in horror movies we get the resolution, and after the dust settles with what appears to be the finale, there's room for one more cheap scare? We get that here too. And after the bodies pile up, our heroes (the lady has been won over by now; I thought her English accent was winning, by the way, as someone mentioned it was not consistent. I thought Ms. Whirry pulled it off) say, let's have sex! Yes, even with the dead bodies around them. Now if that is not a cool movie, what is?

I seen an edited version, no nude scenes; this movie was extremely funny and entertaining. The two "odd couple" pair, were perfect for each other, and I love when the movie comes to a great ending. I won't spoil the plot. Cute, a little dark incidents of crime, but the PI and British lady investigator, always brought it back to a lighter side of funny, and just a great crime, yet feel good movie, The investigation was like a little thrilling romantic adventure of two people that were an obvious "not made for each other" pair. I think the places and/or scenes they had to endure together, were hysterical, yet edgy in a thriller/crime way. The sexual overtones were not overdone, and made it more funny and more believable, in how these two people work together. If you don't mind a few people gettin blown up, it's a really cute, funny and entertaining way to spend watching a movie. But, it's only a movie, so it was really great. Imo.

Bad Acting!!! Bad special Effects... and I thought Witchcraft V was bad. o_O 2 out of 10 stars.. Avoid! Even if your as dumb as me for renting it, probably better to rent one of the Emmanueale movies..