Um Trio da Pesada

W. B., BLUE AND THE BEAN (aka: BAIL OUT) stars intergalactic megastar David Hasselhoff as tennis enthusiast / bounty hunter Roger W. B." (White Bread) Donaldson. His latest job involves an heiress named Nettie (Linda Blair).

What seems like an easy assignment turns into a dangerous adventure when Nettie is abducted by machinegun-toting thugs. W. B. Assembles his team of operatives (aka: goofballs) who must risk their lives, blow stuff up, and mimic the A-Team in their attempt to rescue Nettie.

If you crave brainless action, explosions, infinite gunfire, extra-long car chases, and unexpected full-frontal nudity, then you have just entered the promised land!

Do not miss this blessed event!...

My review was written in February 1990 after watching the film on Vestron video cassette.

Better known by its awkward original title, "W. B., Blue and the Bean", "Bail Out" is an okay action picture released direct to video.

Three title characters are nicknames for David Hasselhoff (as "White Bread"), Tony Brubaker and Tom Rosales, who play skip tracers hired by Charles Brill to protect heiress Linda Blair. She's out on $1,000,000 bail after being apprehended with a boyfriend who's holding drugs. Warring Colombian and Iranian drug lords lead everyone on a merry chase south of the border until Blair finally realizes Hasselhoff is a good guy and starts to cooperate with him.

Helmer Max Kleven, whose second unit directing credits include topnotch films like "Runaway Train", delivers solid action footage here and maintains a light touch. It's the type of picture that used to be drive-in fodder and is of only minor interest to Blair fans, since she is more damsel in distress than action heroine this time out.

They obviously spent a lot of money on this one. There are locations shots, helicopters, explosions, horses, Mariachi sombreros. It's an aimless adventure flick that's supposed to be funny. The people are all caricatures but don't pull it off. I'm not saying it isn't a little fun. It's a TV kind of movie with little real development. A series of episodic rescues. Underlying everything is the fact that people are willing to kill or be killed without really looking into the realities of everything. Linda Blair. What a career. She looks a little frumpy for a leading lady. Hasselhoff is all blue eyes and testosterone. But it is just a bunch of chases, automatic weapons, body parts, some nudity. Just to drag a few people into a movie theater or to watch a video. Like a thousand things I've seen before with almost nothing to recommend it.

Bail out is one of the best movies of all time. David Hasselhoff is the greatest actor ever. This movie displays his unbelievable acting abilities. I have never seen a movie like this. I mean, I was seriously touched while watching this movie.

Hi, Everyone, Let's see... we have some scenes in a mansion, a few shots of Skid Row, a Go-Go bar, 50 guys on horseback, a helicopter, a big dog and a van crashing through a warehouse door. OK, there's our plot.

Now we need some actors who work cheap. Hassle...who? He's still alive? Yeah. Linda Blair. I owe her a favor. She let me cut in front of her in line once at the Unemployment Office.

In this bankruptcy of a movie production, Linda Blair shows she is tougher than David Hasselhoff. Hasselhoff gets the last laugh, however, because he is prettier than Blair.

Casting is usually done in a way that will make the movie better. Kevin Bacon and Drew Barrymore could have had some fun with this. It would have destroyed their careers, perhaps, but it would have been much better.

A better bail bondsman movie would be "Midnight Run." Charles Grodin did get laughs in that film. Charles Grodin would have done a good job in Bail Out but he could not make this into a great movie.

The background music is good. There is a lot of senseless action. Most of the senseless action was the director handing the daily footage to the editor.

Tom Willett