Hospital do Horror

It's one of those creaky British horrors that always show up on the BBC in the early hours of the morning. The reason for this is that the only ones watching are the drunks staggering in from the pub, or the insomniacs interested in a thrill to pass the time away with. The former are the better off because this is a film where not being of sober mind can only aid the viewing.

It's bonkers in plotting, Robin Askwith (just prior to his shift into a sex comedy franchise) is a stressed out singer with a pop group. He decides to go for some R&R at a country retreat. He hooks up with Vanessa Shaw on the train journey in, and once they arrive at the retreat they find it's a bizarro world inhabited by mute bikers, lobotomised robots, a malignant dwarf and a mad doctor (Michael Gough) in a wheelchair!

That's pretty much it, not much makes sense, there's a little sexy nudity, a whole host of sequences where the zombies do nothing of interest, some scenes of the dwarf (Skip Martin) mixing potions and puddings, and some cool fake fights between Askwith and chums and the crash helmet bikers. It plods along gleefully to the finale's big reveal and chase/escape sequence, to round it off as car crash cinema. Splendidly bad and joyful in subtexts. 5/10

A worn out musician decides to take break and go a relaxing vacation. He chooses to stay at health farm located out in the country and on the way there, he meets a girl on the train going to the same place to see her aunty. The mysteriously mean, but crippled Dr. Storm, who's performing brain surgery on the holidaymakers and turning them into his obedient zombies, runs the resort. When the two teens find out about his insane experiments and learn that's their fate. They go out of their way to get away. But they not only have the doctor to face, but also his dwarf sidekick, an army of leather wearing zombies and that of a hideous monster.

Just wait a second, as I just pick up my jaw from the ground. Now, what was that all about!? "Horror Hospital" has got to be one of the most ridiculous and over-exaggerated horror films that I've ever came across, but you know what? I had a real ball with this blend of macabre and camp! That's high camp of a VERY demented type. The praise that I've given makes it sound great and I had a good old time with it. Although, don't be expecting anything particularly fresh and this deranged piece is one downright messy film that doesn't have any idea of the word coherence. So from that point it recycles the same old formula and leaves a lot of things up in the air. The clichés and predictability flows freely, without any sort of constraints. Also forget about logic in the script and story as that's thrown out of the window for absurd situations that don't make much sense. Actually the whole film doesn't make a whole a lot of sense, with the so many potholes and laziness. There's so much going on in the plot that there's such vagueness to everything and the problem is it tries to squeeze too much madness without explaining what happen before it and how it came to that situation. But all is forgiven because it's so abnormal and hugely enjoyable. So, just go with the flow because if you try to decipher what's going on, you'll receive a splitting headache for your troubles. The whole mysterious awe about what's going is just so hard to shake that I couldn't keep my eyes off it.

The actual story is no more then a melodrama disguised as a Gothic shocker, which spurts along some exploitation and black humour along the way. Actually, the whole thing turns into a black farce with everything being poked fun at and the blood splattering is pretty much in a comic book state. Because of that the violence isn't particularly gruesome and it doesn't make you squirm, but the gratuitous bloodletting and nudity does run freely. Damn those leather-clad zombies really do like to hand out a beating! The great thing about it is that everyone involved knows how stupid it really is and don't take the thing so seriously. The performances are plain awful and purely amateurish to say the least. But it's Michael Gough's hellishly campy performance that steals the lime light as the crazy Doctor and Skip Martin as Frederick the dwarf adds a cheeky vibe to the film. The dialogue joins it with its ineptness. But even though these things are terrible there's some energy amongst it and you can't go wrong with the tongue-in-cheek approach it takes. Another strong feature is that of the setting. The resort, which more looks like a castle on the inside, has an oppressive awe about it and the grand Gothic exterior makes it look larger and menacing than it really is. Being isolated in the countryside helps provide such a brood atmosphere too. Although, it's definitely hilariously bad, it still does have its eerie moments worked in. Also the robust score builds on the suspense and uneasiness greatly and the soundtrack is reasonably groovy. Well, what do expect from that era. Really, this is purely utter ham that breathes sadism and sleaze in a very cheap way.

No way can you call this a good film, because it's not. The aim of the flick is to entertain with it being heavily laced with bloody, sleazy and humorous context. Even if the production is pure rubbish, it does it effectively enough that I can see this becoming a guilty pleasure of mine. Only for people who really enjoy camp horror and if you do, you're in for one big treat.

Computer Killers is bloody, campy, goofy, sleazy awesomeness. I originally found this film titled as Horror Hospital.

I enjoyed the acting style because it is over the top and different from what we generally see today.

The film takes place in only a few settings but the one I'm drawn too the most is the train early in the film. The two stranger meet in a simple way but their dialog made me want to laugh and wonder how and why it was chosen. This goes for most of the dialog throughout the film. It is strange, straightforward and wacky without completely going to crazy town.

Overall, the film feels like a good combination of horror and comedy.

I would watch this again, and I will be recommending it to friends. This film is a treat for 70's horror fan. It may be a bit hard to watch if you are not a hardcore horror watcher. If you are on the fence about seeking out this movie, I say go now!

Rock and roll enthusiast, Jason Jones (Robin Askwith) needs a vacation. Luckily for him, a magazine ad leads him to Hairy Holiday, where Mr. Pollack (Dennis Price) sets Robin up with a suitable getaway.

Next stop, the enormous Brittlehurst Manor, where Jason and his new friend, Judy (Vanessa Shaw) encounter Dr. Christian Storm (Michael Gough) and his creepy crew of nefarious cronies. These include the diminutive Frederick (Skip Martin), the devilish Aunt Harris (Ellen Pollock), and various, cadaverous zombies and bikers. Will Jason and Judy ever leave this terrible place?

HORROR HOSPITAL is a crackpot menagerie of the macabre and maniacal. Dr. Storm is carrying out unholy experiments, while something resembling a man made entirely of Silly Putty roams the mansion. If absurdity is what you seek, then seek no more! Gruesome and beyond bonkers, HH delivers the ghastly goods!

CONTAINS: Mad science, brains on a plate, nudity, and decapitation as motor sport!...

Not only was Michael Gough in Sleepy Hollow, a film that boasted the tagline "Heads Will Roll," but Gough also stars in this early 70's horror film where decapitation is integral to the plot. So much for two heads are better than one. This film tells the story of some demented doctor that labotimizes young people so as to make them into his puppets. He is in a wheelchair, has a dwarf-servant, a car that has a blade pop out to slice heads off of people, a seemingly neverending supply of killers clad in biker outfits, and a penchant for cracking his metallic-sounding knuckles. Gough uses no restraint at all in his performance as the crazed physician. His rich aristocratic voice adds all the more to his crazed lack of restraint. Gough's performance is larger than life, not necessarily better. The rest of the cast is adequate. Dennis Price, not long before his death, gives a cameo as an effeminate travel agent. The setting in the film is truly nice, and the film has a good flow of action. Some lacking points are the huge holes in the script, the general editing done in the film, and some lacklustre performances in supporting roles. The film is bad, yet one of those bad ones that can be so enjoyable. Should be seen for Gough's over-the-top performance at the very least.