Die sündigen Nonnen von St. Valentin

This movie is such a complete waste of time even for people like me who kind of like the much-maligned "nunsploitation" genre that I'm going to focus on the ONLY conceivable reason to endure this swill--lead actress Jenny Tamburi (who died earlier this year by the way, lest I come off sounding like a stalker). Tamburi (aka Lucia Della Robbins) was one of a truly incredible crop of young Italian actresses that got their start in early 1970's Italian/European genre films. Of them, only Ornella Mutti became a big international star, but Gloria Guida made quite an impression in softcore sex films. Daria Nicolodi kind of fell into the shadow of Dario Argento (but DID give birth to Asia Argento)while Agostina Belli was breathtakingly beautiful but not a strong enough actress to really break into the big leagues. There's MANY other actresses of this era I could mention, but the one talent that I really felt was wasted was Jenny Tamburi.

Tamburi was excellent in a pretty decent Italian giallo "Smile Before Death", but unfortunately I might be the only person who's seen it. (I'd try to describe the incredible nude photography scene she has with Rosalba Neri in that movie, but I don't want to drool all over my keyboard). She was in Fulci's "Seven Black Notes" all too briefly but really managed to liven up that rather dull film while she was on-screen. She was also in "Frankenstein All'Italia" which has never been translated into English, Sergio Martino's "Suspicious Death of a Minor" (which is being released on DVD in September 2006), and the lurid mother/daughter sex fantasy film "La Seduzione" (like Ornella Mutti, she got kind of typecast into sexy teen roles well into her twenties, but unlike Mutti she never got beyond it).

Normally I wouldn't recommend a dire movie like this based on one pretty girl (or even one pretty, naked girl), but then again I've seen every Jess Franco movie featuring Soledad Miranda and a shameful number of them with Lina Romay, so why listen to me? Put it this way: if you enjoy seeing beautiful and talented young Italian actresses from the golden age of Italian exploitation films, I'd recommend checking out ANY available movie on Jenny Tamburi/Lucia Della Robbin's CV--even this one.

Until the annual Quentin Tarantino film fests began in Austin a couple of years back, I must admit to being naive with regards to the Italian Horror genre.

I enjoy, from time to time, a little mindless entertainment shall we say, and The Sinful Nuns of Saint Valentine could hardly be more mindless. Lots of naked nuns and plenty of the mentally disturbed highlight this 93 minute epic. Don't let me give away the big entombment finish.

Not for all tastes, but if you want to try one on (Italian Horror) this benign little foray is a good starting point. Take on Mario Bava at a later date.

'The Sinful Nuns Of Saint Valentine' is a mildly entertaining slice of 70s European nunsploitation. While it never reaches the demented heights of my fave the sensational 'Killer Nun' ('Suor Omicidi'), it's not a bad way to spend 90 minutes.

What we have here is basically a cheap cash in on Ken Russell's superior 'The Devils'. The background is the Inquisition, and the basic plot concerns a pair of lovers from feuding families ala Romeo and Juliet. Esteban, accused of heresy and murder, seeks sanctuary after being wounded in the convent where his lover the beautiful Lucita is being held. Lucita's father has forbidden her to marry Esteban and has banished her to this kooky place ruled over by a wicked Abbess. Esteban must try and save Lucita from taking Orders and clear his own name before he is captured and executed. Events get even more complicated when Lucita is arrested for the murder of a fellow nun, and must face the evil Inquisitor.

Sadly there isn't half as much "sin" on screen as you would expect. A whipping, some lesbianism, a few topless shots, that's about it. The actress who plays Lucita (Jenny Tamburi?) is stunningly beautiful which makes this mediocre movie much easier to sit through, but you can't help but be disappointed with this fairly innocuous, and not all that exploitative exploitation movie. Things finally start to heat up with a mass semi-naked nun freak out in the last 15 minutes, but it's too little, too late. Jess Franco doesn't have much to worry about from Sergio Greco. Very average, but worth a look if you don't get your hopes up.

At risk of sounding sleazy, I do like 70/80's exploitation flicks. I just can't get enough of the weirdness that they offer.

Coming across a film with a title like this could and should be a reason to rejoice. If only it lived up to it's name.

During Inquisition-era Spain, a man is wrongly accused of a crime. In his attempt to flee he is injured and takes refuge in a convent. This convent also happens to be the same place his beloved has been put by her father, who wants to keep the love birds apart. All looks like it might turn out well, until our female lead's room-mate turns up dead and she is the prime suspect.

Given name and set-up, one would imagine all sorts of sacrilegious sexual goings-on, but instead the film takes itself really seriously and sexual encounters are limited to some (relatively) brief nudity and all of one sex scene, which itself is pretty tame.

It fails miserably at being a 'real' film and isn't all that good at being exploitation either.

3/10

Aaaah! The '70s - THE decade of the exploitation movie: Italian cannibal films, blaxploitation, Nazisploitation, and, of course, nunsploitation, of which The Sinful Nuns of Saint Valentine is a prime example. It's not the most explicit of naughty nun movies, but it does tick a lot of the expected boxes: hot nuns, sex, torture, a crazy abbess, lesbianism, and murder, making it a reasonably fun time for fans of the genre.

Clearly inspired by Romeo and Juliet, the plot sees lovers Lucita (Jenny Tamburi) and Esteban (Paolo Malco) unable to wed because of the long-running feud between their families. To make matters even worse, Lucita is sent to a covent by her father, while Esteban is accused of heresy and hunted by the Inquisition. Chased by three soldiers, Esteban is wounded, but still manages to kill his attackers and make his way to the convent where Lucita is living. Given sanctuary by the verger, Esteban is reunited with Lucita, but not for long... the poor woman is wrongly accused of the murder of her lesbian room-mate Josefa (Bruna Beani) and sentenced to be burned alive. Can Esteban prove her innocence before it is too late?

The naughtiness is limited to bare breasts and butts, and one rather tame sex scene - there's nothing quite on the level of dirty Joe D'amato or sleaze-master Jess Franco - but the women who shed their clothes are mostly attractive, with Tamburi as Lucita being especially sexy; it's no wonder Esteban is willing to risk his life for her. Likewise, the torture isn't too extreme - no nipple slicing or skin flaying on this occasion - but it suffices. Director Sergio Grieco keeps the pace lively throughout, leading to a tense race against time to rescue Lucita from a drooling horde of crazed topless nuns, with a happy ending for these particular star cross'd lovers.