No Chance

Hilarious Parody Sequel to the greatest action movie ever made is an incredibly fun, glorious, laugh out loud tribute to the films of Arnold Schwarzenegger as well as the 80s action genre on a whole.

John Mantrixx (playing himself!) has to escape from a mental institution (don't ask) in order to rescue his daughter Chenny from the clutches of the evil Barrett. Again. And no, those are not typos.

Seriously, if you love 80s action movies, you're in for a treat! This send up is so much fun. Director Matt Poitras and his co-writer Jason Chilton (who also plays Barrett) craft such an epic trip down memory lane with so many call backs to the action movies of our youth while simultaneously doing their own thing. And it works tremendously!

"Mantrixx" also carries this endeavor beautifully with his hilarious impersonation of Arnold, complete with an "ARRGGHH ARRGGHH!" noise every time he moves! I was literally in tears watching him. So perfect. Chilton is also a joy as Barrett, doing the great Vernon Wells proud. The rest of the cast is amazing, particularly one cameo that is sure to get the audience cheering. You'll know it when you see it.

All in all, this was a such a fun time. The kind of movie that feels like if Cannon Group had commissioned a sequel to Commando that was written by the Airplane guys, but directed by David A. Prior on the same budget he made Deadly Prey with. Which is, quite frankly, masterpiece material right there. Its streaming on Amazon Prime right, so if that sounds like your cup of tea, see it ASAP. I highly recommend it!

The production values are practically as good as the original 80s movies it takes off. Those old Arnie movies were just as bad as this film, they really were bad films. If you know all the old films this one is kind of funny. Maybe it's 20 years too last to the spoof craze but it's funny. Don't expect too much though.

Totally lame but that's the point. It's a PARODY. If you take this seriously, your missing all the fun IMO. I'm a child of the 80s action flicks when you had to go to the theater and watch along with other people. Cheers, boos, laughs all added to the experience. I digress, this is a good poke at all those over the top flicks. Cracking up at all the "eyh!"s. Every time John takes an action. 😅 There's a good drinking game in there somewhere Accents are great. Stupid catch phrases abound.

I have to type 145 more characters or IMBD will not allow me to post this review. So here are a bunch of filler characters.

I'll give it a watch again!

The only real deaths in this movie, were the career suicides of everyone involved..

I have no idea what the budget was for this spoof of the 80's Commando flick, I don't think it was much. around the 30 minute mark I began thinking "I hope this doesn't go on for too long". An hour and 35 minutes was way too long for this, I don't think that a spoof needs to copy/reenact most of the original movie. An hour would have been better forcing scenes to be cut/shortened or improved.

This is not a masterpiece, it's mildly entertaining with bad acting sound effects, which mostly work. Yakov Jakemoff looked more like Joe Dirt than a menacing foe. I could go on, but I don't like reading long comments/reviews, so I won't expect you to do so.

Overall, I had a few giggles. Probably not the best spoof of a movie, but definitely above average. I would recommend this to watch.