It’s hard to believe that it’s been four years now since my dad died. The first two years it didn’t seem real. I couldn’t believe he was really gone. Now, over time, I have become used to not having him around. I still miss him very much and wish he were still here; however, it no longer seems that he’ll call or that I’ll visit him tomorrow. I am finally over the routines I had when he was alive.

Now instead of buying his medications, I buy my own and have to remember to take different pills at different times and on certain days. I now understand how he felt about not really being bored staying home. I used to think nothing of going out in the evening, but now once I get home from work, I’m happy to be home and don’t have any desire to go out very often. I sure hope this changes once the weather warms up! I think back to when my mom was alive and would go to church on Wednesday nights with me to help in our AWANA club for the kids when she was in her 60s and early 70s. I give her a lot of credit! In just three more years, I’ll be 60!

It’s strange how some days I feel old and other days I feel like I’m 27! Bundled up, tromping through the snow in the cold I felt like an old lady going to work last week! I guess it depends on my frame of mind and how my knees are that day. Funny how time flies by the older we get. I look forward to retirement, but also plan on enjoying each year along the way!

To find out more about my book and why I wrote it, read the Foreword here. Tweet This

After my mom dad and dad was on his own, he still had his day filled with things he wanted to do. I always thought it would be nice to have the whole day to just do whatever you wanted. I envied him in that way and was always amazed when I'd go visit him the next day on my way to work when he was in his upper 80s to find out he didn't get much done the day before. He would tell me that after breakfast, he fell asleep reading the paper and woke up and it was already lunch time. He would get so frustrated with himself because he'd tell me there just isn't time to do the things he likes after he gets everything else done that as to be done like testing his blood sugar, eating, taking his pills, taking care of his cats and then it seemed that took up his whole day.

I felt sad for him when he'd tell me that and think, wow, what a life. He had several pills to take and at different times in the day which was sort of a hassle for him to keep track of. Then to make things more complicated for him yet, if his blood sugar was over a certain number, then he'd have to give himself some shot. I was impressed at how good he did this all by himself. He didn't need the shots until his last year or so. Up until then, he controlled the diabetes with just a pill.

Now that I am home, recovering from surgery, I experience a similar situation. I have all day and think how much I'm going to accomplish today: comment on blogs, walk the dog, post to my blogs, do a little reading, play with my cats, review my Sunday School lesson and read the paper, maybe even play a little on pogo.com. Then the time flies by, I get a little tired so lay down for a bit with my cats and boom--the day is gone, Gerard is home again and I maybe got half the things done that I wanted to do.

Fortunately, I will get better and become stronger again. The first day I tried going back to work two weeks after my surgery, I was dead tired by the time I got home. The only other time in my life I was that tired was the day we moved. I walked like a 90-yr.-old woman on the way home from the bus stop. I just was out of pep and my shoulders and neck were all tense. It was awful. (I wrote about this on my other blog if you want more detail: Exhausted After My First Day Back To Work. I thought I was ready but found out differently.

My dad, however, never did recover. Getting old involves a big adjustment. You just have to slow down and not expect as much from your body as you once did. This was the hardest thing for him to do because he liked puttering around the house and fixing things. Things that used to take a little time, now take longer to do and although your mind tells you, "I can do this" your body says "No, I can't."

I have decided to take the time that the doctor says I should and enjoy the extra free time God has given me to get caught up on things and schedule some posts ahead again. I hope to start posting on this blog once a week again and so the first thing I did after reading the paper this morning was t write this post. It's been way too long since I posted on here.

Do you get everything done you want to do each day? Probably not. That's why we have to prioritize and do the most important things early to make sure those at least get done. I feel good I finally got my post done for this blog today. Do you make the most of the time you have?