Not only can misogynistic men still get laid, but the declaration that misogynists and incels are one in the same (or that a man who hates women must only feel that way because he can’t get any ass) reinforces the, dare I say, sexist belief that a man’s ability to obtain sexual partners is indicative of his moral value. It also directly confirms the idea that women are “vending machines who dispense sex for good behavior,” which this exact cohort of feminists have repeatedly countered.

Not self-applicable, but definitely amusing.

If a straight woman has made a somewhat blatant indication of interest—she’s put her head on your shoulder, or given you her contact information, or asked you to a movie—you might freak the fuck out, because a woman being interested in you is an impossibility, a violation of the previous laws of social interaction and perhaps reality.

The 2010s messaging that women never wanted men to talk to them was driven by a minority of extreme introverts. Modern-day singles are paying the price.

Or; “Diptych, Panel I: The Mote in His Eye.”

A nice discussion of het dating norms and a useful script for treating people.

But I think there’s a more radical slipperiness in that “our sense of right and wrong” and “the social reaction of others” are not as separable as we like to think. Elsewhere, the article tries to get past the fear of accidental harm by encouraging the reader to make use of the “common-sense understanding of offensiveness that you have developed as a minimally functional adult living in a society.” The issue, I think, is that one’s common-sense understanding of what makes people feel uncomfortable or unsafe is built by receiving or observing social consequences.

I’m still haunted by the sense that my attraction to women is in some way inherently, almost psychically, harmful. I just don’t have the practice in more representative circles to have worked through it on an instinctual level.

Oh my God. Such beautiful application of contemporary philosophy to the pains of social life.

sometimes i wish i wasnt aroace but not because i actually want to date anyone its just because the structure of society makes it rly hard to be single😭

Sometimes people say, “obviously, everyone would like to be polyamorous themselves and get to have sex with anyone they want, while their partners are all monogamous and only have sex with them. That way, you get sexual variety and don’t have to feel any jealousy.” I think this is completely false.

Great video on amatonormativity and the loneliness of masculinity.