💯% COOL!

The important bits remain to describe the wearer

I read that in Mario’s voice…

It’s too bad you can’t wear it in winter, cuz then you’d be ice cold

These days I’m like 60%-65% cool. I wouldn’t be able to wear this.

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What did the original label say?

When I was a kid, I had a shirt that said “my mommy says I’m cool.”

As a young adult, I had a shirt that said “98% Monkey.” (That one once got me a minor discount!)

I loved both of those shirts.