Culte - 2Be3

If you ever wondered what would happen if a documentary about 90s boy bands was turned into a feature film with the dramatic depth of a glass of water, here is the answer: 2Be3: Three Disasters and a Microphone.

Set in a generic 1995, this film promised to portray the rise of 2Be3, the first French boy band, but it gets stuck in a jumble of poor performances and a script that seems to have been written by an AI fed solely on 80s soap operas.

Instead of a compelling musical drama, we get a series of forced poses and forgettable dialogue.

The climax is anticlimactic and, frankly, seems like an excuse to include as much 2Be3 music as possible. If you are a fan of the band, perhaps nostalgia will earn it an extra point. For the rest of humanity, it's an hour and a half of your life that you will never get back. A film so flat and predictable it makes lip-syncing look like a complex performance. Save your money and just listen to the original soundtrack; at least it's shorter.

This is hands down one of the worst films I've ever endured. It makes no sense, goes nowhere and somehow manages to be both boring and confusing at the same time. The characters are cardboard cut-outs, the dialogue is painful and the plot... what plot? You'd get more drama from a snail race. Watching this is like staring into the void while it mocks you. Honestly, watching paint dry would be a more meaningful experience. Do yourself a favor and skip it.