Cabin Fever

This movie should not have been made. It does nothing new, different or even remotely better than the admittedly average original. Had it been Evil Dead-remake caliber, we would have been in for something special. But everything from the acting to the gore has taken a considerable hit with this remake as to effectively make it Cabin Fever-lite. This movie doesn't even try to be original in its retelling of the film, as the same basic set-up (and even some of the dialogue) has been reused and recycled to ill-effect. Worst part of it all? Save for a few of the actors, the performances were atrocious. Honesty, I have seen found-footage films with better acting than what some of these no-talents pulled off. The movie was limited in its vision, and toning down the gore does a disservice to everything that was good about the original film. It's just basic in almost every way, and really is a waste of resources. If you didn't believe Eli Roth was a hack before, you certainly will after watching this mess. Not recommended, even if you have absolutely nothing else to watch.

The original Cabin Fever wasn't a great movie by any means, but had fun with itself while showcasing some convincing gory effects; a low budget body horror about a cast of dumb college age couples (and the odd man out) succumbing to a terrible flesh-eating disease in the woods. The 2016 version is just a modernization of the original, hitting all of the same story beats but giving our characters smart phones, automatic rifles, and pop culture references a-plenty. One character in particular is so unlikable that I wouldn't blame anybody for switching the movie off after enduring a few scenes with this guy. Overall, it's bland, visually unexciting, and doesn't replace the original in any way.

I mean what the hell. Remaking movies that're less than 15 years old... What's next?

Cabin Fever is just another one of those movies where studio executives thought, "Hey, the original was good so why not milk the f*ck out of the name and release heaps of garbage, call them sequels, and the money will come." Now this reboot comes along with the exact same script as the original so I figure the execs were just like, "F*ck it, why even try?" And it shows. The good news is that this isn't a theatrical release - it's limited on-demand or something so thankfully a majority of people won't be aware of this abomination's existence. But for those who are, let me affirm your suspicions: this movie blows.

First off, none of these people should be allowed to act ever again. I hesitate to call them actors because I saw no semblance of acting on screen. The characters are unlikable and annoying, which is weird because I don't remember hating them in the original. I didn't care if any of them died; in fact I wanted them all to die so the movie would end as quickly as possible. It literally goes down the horror movie cliché checklist. The cabin in the woods schtick, clueless college kids, creepy guy at a gas station, perfunctory sex scenes, loud sound effects to make you jump, etc. Hell, even the gore is lame. Patient Zero had better gore effects.

Please don't watch this movie. It makes Patient Zero look like The Dark Knight. Watch the original if you want, or literally any other Eli Roth movie. I don't blame Roth for this mess because I'm pretty sure he just signed off on it, made some green and never thought about it again. It doesn't even have his signature silly style. It tries to take itself seriously and it fails miserably. Then they shoehorn in some jokes that aren't funny at all, and you laugh at how horribly they were delivered, and then you'll contemplate what you're doing with your life. It's a chore to watch, seriously.

Cabin Fever is just another byproduct of the horror remake craze. Avoid at all costs.

I'm not the one to hate on horror movie remakes I actually enjoy watching a classic remade for the modern audience. But that's only when the director can create a new modern twist or add more to what the original didn't have like what Zombie did for Carpenter's Halloween. But the remake of Eli Roth's Cabin Fever is just one of the most pointless horror remakes I've ever seen next to Psycho. The story of the movie is lame. It's everything you seen in the original just with different actors in these scenes. You actually know what's coming next. You even know what the characters are gonna say next. There's nothing new added in the directors own vision. It's the same Dog death opening scene. The scene where one of the characters gets his hand attacked by Dennis is the same. Even the camp fire story is the same. The only difference is the ending of the movie, which is not half bad. The characters are very unimportant to this movie or at least they felt like it. You don't pay even a minute of attention to them because, well they are supposed to be the same as well and they make the same dumb choices of survival as the original. The blood n gore effects seem to be up higher than the original. But it might it some gore lovers we do see a lot more blood all around in some scenes especially in the bath tub scene we see even some skin coming off.

I didn't enjoy this remake at all it's nothing, but watching the same movie you already seen. You know what's coming next. The characters die in the sane order as they did in the original. The only differences you'll find is the ending, higher blood n gore, and different actors who shouldn't be allowed to ever act in another movie again. I don't recommend you watch this waste of a remake. You'll have a much more better time re watching the original movie.