Looters, Tooters and Sawn-Off Shooters

August 22cnd 2017, it still feels like yesterday, my beloved husband Pete had an awful week at work. He worked for HMRC as a tax officer for over 25 years and took a great deal of pride in his work. This particular week, I sensed a sadness in him, like he was becoming frustrated by the younger intakes coming into the organisation. To cheer him up, I went out to Asda and got him his favourite dinner, and came across this movie as I was checking out...Petey always loved British crime films, he loved the work of Guy Ritchie and all things crime. I thought he would love to sit down with bangers and mash, with a good movie and let the troubles of his week drift away, accompanied by a sturdy ale.

When Pete arrived home, I had his slippers by the door and sat him down with this DVD. Whilst cooking his dinner I left Pete to watch the movie with his feet up with a pint of Speckled Hen. Upon bringing his dinner in on a tray, I saw Pete and gasped, he was frozen, he looked like Petrified Colin Creevey From Harry Potter. He was just frozen with a face like someone had screeched their nails on a blackboard. Petey was rushed to hospital and put in what Dr Singh called a CIC (Cringe Induced Coma). Sadly Pete passed away 3 days later...occasionally I will put the movie on, as it always reminds me of Pete

Petey, if you can hear me up there I love and miss you darling. I know I will see you again some day...Until we meet again, your loving Karen.

Loud mouthed plastic wannabee gangsters poor story line which jumps all over the place. The viewer simply cant follow what is going on or which characters have done what to whom.Poor acting has hindered any real enjoyment even for fans of the Gangster genre.If some time and more thought had of been given to casting to gain just one or two good actors this would of been better.Unfortunately what we have here a multitude of mismatched characters to further confuse the story played by as it seems anyone who turned up on the day. The lines were delivered with no real conviction leaving the film feeling flat with no real impact

After seeing HOOLGANS AT WAR which is in my opinion the worst British film I've seen in a very long time if not ever I thought I might be suffering pangs of conscience . As soon as I wrote my review people who had never worked on that film no siree thought I'd been disingenuous to a degree seeing as the other reviewers who couldn't possibly have worked on that film in any capacity whatsoever guv thought HOOLIGANS AT WAR was more deserving of a nine or ten rating . These same people also highly rated a movie with a mouthful of title LOTTERS , TOOTERS AND SAWN OFF SHOOTERS which suspiciously has an overlapping cast . I came on to this page and found yet another host of people were rating this one while claiming the positive reviews could only have been written by shills . Let's be honest here , these type of reviews are easy to spot , but if there's a chance that any movie could possibly be worse than HOOLIGANS AT WAR this might just be the one

To be fair LOOTERS is nothing more than a mediocre British crime flick but to be fair it's nothing less than this also . It does have a student film look about it but to give the director(s) the benefit of the doubt this might be trying to emulate realist cinema . Certainly you can't say it looks like it was filmed on a mobile phone . It's not a glamorous film either and does show the fall out to innocent people that violence brings and once somebody decides to impulsively take that road they find it's very difficult to leave due to other people . The subtext doesn't entirely work as presented here

The whole screenplay needed a bit more development especially the insults and one liners which momentarily seem amusing when written down but across as annoying on screen and also shows signs of purple prose . What realthings down is that the actors just aren't good enough and with a better cast it could been a much better film . As it stands it's just mediocre

The story of Charlie and Cheltham is a story which could be based on a true story in the murky London criminal scene. It is raw and gritty and is what it is! Full of action, drama and a sprinkling of suspense. A film made from the heart and soul of the King family and the dedication of all the leads and supporting actors who spent many months dedicated to ensuring the film came to fruition. I am no critic but like any film buff you will notice the strong points and the weak points. There was some excellent acting from actors who have never been trained and found themselves in at the deep end working alongside some well know faces from the TV, film and music industry. This could make its way into one of the top cult British Gangster films. A very big well done to all involved.

The DVD box looks good, the film title rhymes well. But beyond this the film is more than disappointing. If the cast were recruited from Amateur dramatic groups then they've made a good job. Don't think your going to watch "A Classy Well Crafted British Gangster Movie" as described on the case.

British films like "Scum" through to "Starred Up" Are what you call classy and well crafted. Looters, Tooters and Sawn of Shooters is more "A Crassy you've been Shafted slangster movie"

This film will go on the shelf....at the local charity shop, then at least some good will come from the purchase of this film.