Sweet Bobby : Imposture sur mesure

Hopefully Kirat doesn't read the reviews shaming her. Unfortunately at times of vulnerability we are all vulnerable. A woman who is going through a bad breakup finds solace and comfort from a friend on Facebook. The friend is connected to family members who know him so she of course thinks he's safe. The relationship progresses and like any story of abuse she finds herself in a web that's hard to get out of. Then her whole world turns completely upside down when she realizes she's been catfished. I thought the documentary on the whole was well done. I think it actually would have been better to not have disclosed the catfish crime in the title. Basically as I'm watching I'm distracted by wondering who 'sweet Bobby' really is and not the story. Other than that I applaud Kirat for participating in making this film, couldn't have been easy. I appreciate her courage and hope that films like this do save others from being victimized.

Yes, Kirat is as gullible as a person can possibly be. The cousin is a psychopath who belongs in prison. That being said, the ridiculous but very powerful cultural expectations at play were also largely responsible for what happened to Kirat. The relentless pressure from the parents and extended family to marry and have children, and the constant reinforcement of the message that you have not fulfilled your role in life if you are not a wife and mother are so gross and sad. I can see how someone could become desperate to fulfill those cultural and familial expectations at any cost when that is what you are beaten over the head with constantly. Shame on the parents, and especially the father who tried to weasel his way out of taking any responsibility by trying to justify that 'all parents want grandchildren', and ultimately it was Kirat's choice. No, not quite. This is what can happen when you put relentless pressure on people to conform to archaic cultural and familial expectations. Let people be!

As I watched the film, I thought about all the judgement the lady would now have to face from a lot of people hearing her story but still, it turned out to be worse than I predicted.

I didn't come here with intentions to defend Kirat because I was frustrated with her actions A LOT but I am actually more appalled by the reaction to her experience; the attacks and the total lack of empathy. So I decided to add something different.

I cannot understand why people are so extremely angry with her that she believed the story of the abuser. And I mean, extremely angry, even furious at times! It didn't happen to you. She didn't hurt you or anybody else.

The question of "how could she be that stupid?" is repeated with harsher synonyms, even though the main reason is provided in the film multiple times: Kirat was born and raised in a family and culture that believes getting married and having children are one of the best and most important things in life. I don't believe that at all but I accepted the crazy thought that there are women with different goals and priorities than mine ;) Kirat explained what she felt at that time: inside and outside pressure to be like others in the community, fear of being too old to have a baby, being judged, disapproved and simply alone. It's nothing new and uncommon that she was easy to be manipulated and abused in that situation.

If you have never met a smart person struggling to get out of the abusive relationship and if you didn't check but you know you could have never ever been manipulated and exploited by a close person nobody would even think of suspecting, then this film should make you feel very clever and superior. But also very angry at the victim for blaming a particularly twisted perpetrator. But I wish you didn't watch it or at least comment unless you have some empathy ;)

The story itself is interesting but I would have wished to hear more about the intrinsic motivation what made her stay in that 'relationship' for so long. You just hear a story of someone being catfished. Are there any reasons given why this could go on for ages? Not really. Judging from their conversations he didnt even present himself as a knight in shining armour, rather opposite. And the documentary fails to deliver an answer or at least some kind of explanation. Probably 90% of the documentary is about both of them exchanging messages. Thats it. I was in a similar relationship and the motives to remain in this are deeply psychological and this documentary could have investigated the psychological side too in order to maybe help others who are in a similar situation and to make it more interesting. If a man is interested but doesnt want to meet you, he is either married or in a relationship, is a fraudster or you are being catfished. There is nothing in between. I wished the documentary was a bit more elaborate and not just 90% showing messages. It is difficult to understand why someone as intelligent acts so gullible and the show does not give any answers at all. It was a bit boring in between too. I didnt quit because I wanted to know whats behind all of this.

Alltogether it is a nice time pass but dont expect too much.

Sweet Bobby: My Catfish Nightmare touches on the darker side of social media and its impact on individuals, particularly within the Facebook ecosystem. It highlights how the documentary exposes stories of countless victims whose experiences often go unnoticed, shedding light on how people become consumed by carefully curated images rather than real-life connections. The point about gullibility, especially concerning Kirat, challenges viewers to consider the widespread nature of this issue - suggesting it's not just about individual naivety, but a reflection of how social media platforms like Facebook shape behavior, particularly in places like India.

While I acknowledge that people are more aware of these dangers now, it is an interesting contrast, noting that they weren't as cautious in the earlier days of social media. Conclusion, giving it a 7 out of 10, seems fair and balanced, recognizing the documentary's relevance but also implying there's more to be explored.