Alarum

I had the whole time the feeling that it's a comedy. A bluff, it made me laugh countless times. It was like a manual of how to NOT make a movie.

Not a single positive thing. Not a single logical thing. It is impossible for a movie script to make absolutely no sense, not even a single second.

So that's why i believe was made as an undercover comedy.

"We are here not to unleash chaos but to define it" is the most idiotic line ever written. Especially that he said it after he killed people of his own team... And also when he got a shot on the actual target of that chaos he simply didn't kill him...

Absolutely written badly on purpose.

My opinion...

I am still trying to understand why...

We only watched this because Sylvester Stallone was in it. I mean, I'm all for a guy getting paid, but damn this was a slogfest. It's touted as a spy action movie and it's trying, but this had to be one of the worst movies we've watched in a while. Hell, Stallone's previous movie Armor was better than this and that's saying something.

Stallone isn't in this movie for very long maybe 10 minutes, if that and he plays a super-assassin who's supposedly a master of poisons. Sounds cool, right? Wrong. He's terrible at his job in every conceivable way. It's disappointing, to say the least.

I'm not even going to talk about the plot because (A) it's terrible, and (B) I'd rather go on a tangent.

The bad guys in this movie are some of the most incompetent villains to ever grace the screen.

For example, our "heroes" are trapped in a small building with two automatic shotguns. The bad guys? They've got automatic weapons, surround the building, and outnumber them at least 3 to 1. Do they attack? No, because as one genius says, "They have heavy artillery." Seriously? I'm not sure if this was supposed to be a serious action movie or a comedy, but wow.

Another gem: the bad guys have the ex-female spy outnumbered and surrounded. Yet somehow, they still manage to lose because they're...well, terrible. I get it, main characters have plot armor, but come on how am I supposed to take this seriously when the villains seem braindead?

And don't even get me started on the drones in the last act. That final action scene has to be the stupidest thing ever put on film. I am convinced the technical advisor if there even was one had no clue how military drones actually work.

I cannot recommend this one by any means. Not even for Stallone fans. You'll just be highly, HIGHLY disappointed in his role and the acting here. Save yourself the time and just rewatch Demolition Man or Rambo instead. At least those movies are fun and entertaining.

I give this 3 out of 10.

Despite having Scott Eastwood and Stallone, this film is ponderous. Eastwood hardly seems enthusiastic, and really doesn't give the impression of having once been a top agent. Stallone is beginning to creak, and he struggles physically with this action picture, which should have been much tighter.

Mike Colter deserves a shout out. His villain is cold, calculating and murderousy believable, but he is wasted in this calamity. The shootouts are just not believable, Eastwood seems to be missable at every opportunity and during his first gunfight, he has a machine gun that never needs reloading!

Willa Fitzgerald holds it together rather well, but isn't able to rescue this mess.

The ingredients are simple: lure some stars with synopsis to a project, but then put all of it in hands of bad writing, amateur direction, tons of nonsense and awful sfx, plot holes large as the local group of galaxies, drunk editing, absence of any coherence and attempts of acting (actually, what acting? True, some of the participants in this gave it a try but, alas, to no avail). Did you know that you can perform a large shootout (no one reloads even once) with a lot of explosions and noise in a relatively small town (they call it village), allegedly in Poland ("enemies" speak Russian, of course, and die like in John Wick, by dozens, being incompetent like kindergarten children), and no inhabitants even come to the window to see what happens? There's nobody anywhere near but "our heroes". The cherry on top of this mess is a strong hint on possible sequel, since this abruptly ends. God forbid! There are A movies, B movies, even C movies. At the bottom there are BS movies. This is a fine example. Two stars for skill of engaging Sly and Scott Eastwood. Were they blackmailed to participate? Nothing else could explain it. Run from this before it's too late.

Alarum, a 2025 action crime thriller, unfortunately fell far short of my expectations. The most significant flaw lies in its weak script. The plot development lacks logic and coherence; the plot points are simplistic and poorly constructed. Many scenes feel jarring and abrupt, lacking necessary context and explanation. This makes it difficult to understand the characters' motivations and actions, ultimately hindering audience engagement.

Furthermore, I was surprised by Sylvester Stallone's limited screen time. Advertised as a key draw, his presence and contribution to the narrative were far less substantial than anticipated, diminishing a major potential highlight of the film. While Scott Eastwood delivered an acceptable performance, it couldn't compensate for the deficiencies in the script and overall plot.

While the action sequences were technically well-executed, the sluggish pace and lack of tension rendered them underwhelming. They failed to elevate the viewing experience. In summary, Alarum is a disappointing film. It squandered a talented cast and production resources, resulting in a mediocre, even poor, cinematic experience. I doubt even a director's cut could salvage this film. The special effects also disappointed, appearing rough and dated compared to current standards. The film lacked any memorable or impactful moments.