Jersey Shore Massacre

If I could rate this awful piece of crap movie a 0 or Negative rating I would. The whole production crew, writers, actors and director should be ashamed that they made this filth. How they sat around, and came up with this idea. Then said "Ya this sounds like a good movie to make!" All of you that read this that were apart of it PLEASE SLAP THE HELL out of yourself!!!!

This movie was way better than I though it would be. I have seen a lot of crappy horror flicks but this one was not one of those. This movie was one of those Comedy Horror type movies. Lots of gore and lots of boobs. Plus this movie will be a plus for us Howard Sterns fans as they are some cameos by Stern staff and whack pack. if you have nothing to do on a weekend and want to see a decent horror flick than this wont disappoint.

Also I have to say that the acting in this movie was not to bad. You usually get really cheesy actors to do these types of movies. To my surprise it was actually pretty good. A thing that low budget horror flicks suffer from is crappy FX. This movie delivered when it same to special efxs. Listen hands down the movie is pretty decent for a view when there is nothing else to see and if you are a Howard Stern fan.

I wish i had chance to give it minus point to not make a "movie" like this.

Guidos and guidettes meet their gory end, but not before they try to smash after fist pumping at the club. Yeah buddy! From the maker of Girls Gone Dead, Paul Tarnopol teams up with Jwoww Productions for the latest addition to the B-movie horror genre to give audiences Jersey Shore Massacre.

A group of girl friends head down the shore for a fun-filled Jersey staycation. When a mistake with their reservation causes their shore house to get snagged, they must venture away from Seaside Heights to a family member's secluded home in the boonies – also known as the Pine Barrens. The guidettes don't let that stop them, they head back to the club and try to find some nice juice-heads. These DTF bimbos find a group of GTL-ed jerks, go back to the house to get into the jacuzzi, but instead are hunted to bloody and gruesome deaths by a deranged killer stalking them.

Jersey Shore Massacre amps up and satirizes Jersey stereotypes just as much as you would expect from this B-movie. The hair, outfits and exchanges between characters, named and parodied off RHONJ, are stupid ridiculous. Interestingly the film tries to be authentic while being absurd by accurately retaining locational vernacular in the dialogue and filming in New Jersey. And with so many Italian actors and actresses cast in Jersey Shore Massacre it makes the opening credits feel like an immigration record from Ellis Island.

All for heavy handed outrageousness – the film starts off strongly. Momentarily Tarnopol's Jersey Shore Massacre is like witnessing the secret and dark fantasy realized – the Jersey Shore cast bludgeoned and dead (joking of course). Preposterously idiotic, but sufficiently better acted than most B-movies thanks to the two female leads portrayed by Angelica Boccello and Danielle Dallacco, Jersey Shore Massacre can't help but make you laugh from the stupidity of the conversations between the characters.

Unfortunately, the novelty of Jersey Shore Massacre fades quickly and interest wanes as it takes almost an hour for the film to switch from Jersey Shore knock off to horror flick. When the horror does get started it is excessively gory and bloody without the campy funny deaths wanted. It takes finesse to be a comedy pretending to be a horror and Jersey Shore Massacre is missing that magical balance.

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Sure some people love to give polarized scores, a 1 or a 10. This is a 1 for real. It's the worst parts of Jersey Shore and not bad enough, it adds a small amount of massacre. It's really not a massacre, it's massacre lite. The kills aren't very much fun, and the Jersey Shore part is so off putting you just can't enjoy anything about this movie.