The Pick-Axe Murders Part III: The Final Chapter

This movie is a Friday The 13th wanna-be. God knows how many times I rolled my eyes at hearing how many try-hard references there was to the name Cunningham in this. However, being a Jason fan, and tolerating quite a lot of wanna-be and intentionally a tribute to F13th films, this one fails on many levels.

For starters, the cast is not believable, and I couldn't care less about them. One lead looks like Katherine Tate trying to pull off being a high school student again. Maybe if she was cast in Grease she could get away with it, but her age is as obvious to the veiwer as her non-existent acting skills. Then they have thrown in two guys who look like a cross between Artie Lang and John Belushi, without the charisma, and we're expected to beleive they're sexy leading men that all women can't get enough of. Then there is Poindexter and Mr Sweetchucks son who the plot tried to make you care and feel sorry for, but fails miserably at how forced and lame it was done.

Despite terrible actors and poor dialog, the cutting of the film seems rushed or unfinished. It cuts between one shot, to a shot that should have had a bit more in between to make it a smooth transition. But no, we get someone trying to drive away from the killer, to the killer hanging on the side of the van like he teleported there. It's just bad, and not even laugh out loud bad.

The gore effects are really amateurish. Apparently anyone who gets killed in this movie spits blood out their mouth and let's it flow down their chin. Even amatuers know to mix things up, not have everyone's death scene do the same spitting blood out routine.

With too many rushed cuts and bad edits, probably missing scenes needed, or ran out of money to shoot, mixed with the poor visual effects and pathetic acting, writing, directing, sound department, I can't really say anyone did a good job at anything on this film... Maybe just the cameraman/men. That's about it.

Even if you don't mind a F13th try-hard rip-off, don't bother with this one. It's not worth your time.

Lots of fun. I'd like to see more of the series. Great job with a small budget. Lots of blood and practical effects.

A cast full of well likeable characters, all definitely teenagers on their way to a concert of the absolute highest echelon of music, preformed by Sacrilegious Desecration get brutally murdered by sack wearing, pick axe wielding, chokeslam giving mountain of meat and hatred.

The banter between the gas station/café couple was hilarious and wish we got more of their gems i.e. "you smell like hamburger grease and racoon farts" and "get on ya goddam knees and suck my flesh flute" another classic ill be using from now on was "I'll hold my nose and pretend its ya sister".

The capabilities of the actress at 58mins 20seconds needs to be acknowledged.. Absolute scene stealer.

Kills were a little repetitive.. but overall enjoyable to watch.

This movie reminds me of a Rob Zombie film, except with half of his budget and only a fraction of his imagination. Every single character is written exactly the same; each person, man or woman, is a *foul-mouthed *beer-swilling *drug-induced *sex-crazed *garbage human

That's pretty much the formula for Zombie films, and it's the same here. This one even has that same Zombie grit and filth to it on all the sets that Zombie and his fans seem to love. I'm actually surprised he didn't have anything to do with this.

Anyway, nothing new to see. On top of that, a less-than-captivating bad guy, less-than-inspiring heroes, subpar special effects, and tired story threads are a recipe for a stinker of a movie.

The traumatized survivor girl turns in a decent performance, I should say. Not enough to save the film, but enough for me to mention it.

As said, seen it before, done far better elsewhere. D grade.

The first 5 minutes offer potential .The rest is just awful Avoid