Lap Dance

Considering the title and the fact it stars Carmen Electra made me think this movie would be a lot more entertaining.

I was hoping for something like Burlesque and after watching the first 20 minutes maybe something as Showgirls... After all it felt like the kind of movie made for TV: just a story in a life of a couple that almost drifts them apart.

Not intriguing, not surprising, not entertaining.

I believe the director put as many stripper/lap dance scenes as he could to compensate for the lack of story. I think all these horrible POV angles with very questioning lightning didn't help the movie either.

Not worth watching.

The plot is utter crap.

Girl puts boyfriend and her in debt and convinces her boyfriend the only way out is her giving lap dances ummmmmm yay..... :( He should kick her to the curb like you should kick this movie to the curb.

There are so many other ways to empower women but stripping..... really?

I'm going to go rub sand in my eyes now.

This film tells the story of a young woman who enters the world of exotic dancing in order to pay for her father's mounting medical bills. Despite initial agreements with her fiancé, her relationship with her fiancé is severely compromised.

"Lap Dance" is a story of Monica's struggle to make money, but she still gets sucked into the glittery world of hedonism. I find it really strange that the fiancé actually stays in the club often. Isn't it so weird to watch your fiancée strutt it off in a club? Anyway, a lot of thing happen in the story, including fights with other women, jealousy, poor health and relationship problems. It is quite a struggle to keep herself at a distance from the money and attention, and this struggle is portrayed wel. It is interesting film to watch.

The writer/director didn't seem to understand stripper culture, so the movie is inauthentic. The lead actress is TERRIBLE. She seems to have studied strippers to get an 'affect', not realizing that the affect she is trying to emulate is actually the influence of opiates and alcohol. So, about halfway through the movie, she begins acting like she's in a daze and slowing her speech - nothing like a bad actress, being slow about it.

Much like 'How To Plan An Orgy In A Small Town' (2015, also a terrible movie), if you imply sexuality in a title, you have to deliver. This movie doesn't have enough sex and it doesn't have enough nudity - which should have been the whole point of watching.

RealReview Posting Scoring Criteria: Acting - 0.5/1 Casting - 0.5/1 Directing - 1/1 Story - 0.5/1 Writing/Screenplay - 0.5/1

Total Base Score = 3

Modifiers (+ or -) Cinematography: 0.5 (There were a couple lap dances in 'Lap Dance') Believability/Consistency: -0.5

Total RealReview Rating: 3

If you're going to make a movie about Lap Dancing, AT LEAST have the common courtesy to hire an actress who seems willing to take her kit off and can, ya know, 'dance'. The female lead here seems to want to maintain her 'purity' when it comes to shedding her togs... Which is great. More power to her. The problem is, in a film about topless ladies writhing around on sweaty men with seductive music playing in the background, it stands out a mile when the main star a) Keeps her lingerie on at all times and b) can't move sexy to save her life. Let's face it... With that front cover, and that title, you expect there to be more flesh on display than the pitiful amount here.

No, the director seems to think we'd be more interested in soapy histrionics, so there are sub plots about our budding exhibitionist's love life going down the crapper due to her new career, and her dad stuck in a hospital bed dying of terminal cancer. Boring, boring, boring. Words cannot express how bland and clichéd this stale material is... Yet the way the director dives into it, you'd think it was Oscar calibre stuff. Talk about deluded. If you're looking for I'll-just put-my-hand-in-my-pocket-for-a-couple-of-hours kind of flick, try your local specialist shop... Or just search online...

If you're after something that deftly combines the heartbreak of a failing relationship, and the loss of a parent into a wonderful tapestry of human emotion for the ages... Man, did you take a wrong turning!! 3/10