Lord of Tears

This was a recommendation, it was suggested to me that this looked like it could potentially be scary stuff! It was not, it truly truly wasn't.

Lord Of Tears is one of those horrors that thinks it's a lot smarter than it actually is, an over convoluted plot, an arthouse look and student film level quality.

An English horror I'm surprised just how much I walked away disliking the film, some of the visuals are adequate but there is just no substance, lackluster performances and honestly the plot is a mess.

I like the concept I do, but it was utilized so incompetently it left the film a barely watchable embarassment.

I'm not a great lover of British cinema at the best of times but this is British cinema in the hands of people who have no place in the industry.

Certainly one to avoid.

The Good:

Beautiful scenery

Visual effects are quite good in places

The Bad:

Acting is sub-par

Comes across like a bad arthouse film

Awful scoring

At several points I did actually ask myself what the hell I was watching

Plot is seven shades of awful

Things I Learnt From This Movie:

No accent grinds on me more than a Scottish one

You can stay in the Mansion featured in the film for just under 400 British pounds per night

I never "review" movies, but when horror breaks what I consider to be the #1 cardinal rule of the genre, it makes me almost angry for some reason. That rule, which is an entirely personal one, is that if you're going to take yourself dead seriously with your horror movie, you damn well better have good acting. Your story has to embrace camp in order for bad acting to have any hope of working. The lead actors ability is to me only a few small steps above infomercial quality. There is no feeling to his performance here whatsoever, especially when it calls for dire emotion which it does much too often. The story's execution, although interesting on paper, really doesn't do him or the lead actress any favours. I couldn't in good conscience rate it as low as possible because there are three things, a star for each, that to me must be commended: 1) The location and cinematography that takes place outdoors is fantastic. Beautiful stuff. 2) The lead actress is absolutely gorgeous here, and her performance singlehandedly carried me through to the end, which I could barely believe I made it to. She is embarrassingly cheesy in the third act, which I won't spoil here, but that is entirely the fault of the filmmakers. She did what she could with what she was given. 3) The movie is dedicated to Christopher Lee. This one is self explanatory.

3/10

I'm all about Horror (and I mean Horror, with capital "H"), Thrillers, Film-Noir, Suspense and some (very few) Indie films (or "Artsy") When I took a look at the trailer it seemed to have a healthy mix of those things I always enjoyed watching (as an example, my favorite movies in the above mentioned genres are "The Exorcist" I and III, Jacob's Ladder, Alien and Angel Heart, just to mention a few).

Alas, (almost) none of these elements are to be found in "Lord of Tears", though the effort seems genuine.

What really transpires through out the entire movie is confusion and insecurity; at best. And I assure you, you will feel it as well.

There is a lot of needless repetition in imagery (that - it self - is under-achieved, though one can imagine what the intention was for it), a lot of rushed shots and out of sync/time with the general emotion it was trying to convey (either too soon for said shots or too late... or too much of it, to be honest). I had this constant feeling the director/writer (maybe both) had several ideas and were trying them all out and were unable to choose the most effective ones and ended up using them all. Well, that was not a good idea.

A movie is also about pace/timing. And pace/timing is nowhere to be seen nor felt.

Also, there are ideas there that are used ad nauseam: too many "flash shots", too much of the female character later "pole dancing" (seriously, that particular part of the movie made me facepalm, smirk and yawn all at once). Too much pseudo-romance. Too much of many things I can't tell or I'll end up ruining the perfect opportunity for you to also facepalm, smirk and yawn as I did (if you indeed want to watch this movie).

The intention is good, that is all about the good things I have to say about it, and I honestly wish the best of luck to the people involved in making this movie, and may they take the experience and learn with it.

Director Lawrie Brewster's LORD OF TEARS is the story of James Findlay (Eaun Douglas), who has inherited his family estate in the Scottish highlands. Said estate was the source of many childhood nightmares for young James. His late mother even attempts to dissuade him, via a letter left for him, from moving into the place.

Unperturbed, James moves right in... and the new nightmare begins.

First off, let's talk about the house itself, which is one creepy place! The exterior looks like an ancient asylum crossed with a mausoleum. The interior is a labyrinthine collection of tight hallways, countless rooms, and winding staircases. In a word, it's perfect!

Strange occurrences start almost immediately.

Enter Eve (Alexandra "Lexy" Hulme), an American woman who is eager to help James uncover the truth about his past. Ms. Hulme's Eve is a beguiling, playful woman whose every move seems seductive. Her dance and swimming pool entrance scenes are unforgettable! There's something different about Eve. Something mysterious and somehow foreboding. She undergoes a transformation that almost defies description. Ms. Hulme delivers the terror in spades!

Brewster captures a growing sense of dread, perfectly. His film is fittingly surreal without tumbling into absurdity. It's also scary as hell! The house, the grounds, and the surrounding landscape are characters in themselves. This is for those who enjoy the macabre, the gloomy, and the doom-filled.

And we haven't even mentioned the enigmatic Owl Man...

Wow, either director Lawrie Brewster recruited all his friends and relatives to give high ratings and write favorable reviews for his film, OR none of the avid fanatics around here has ever seen a genuinely atmospheric Gothic horror movie. I'm sure my user comment will receive a lot of not-useful votes, but what the hell, "Lord of Tears" does not deserve its current 7.1 out of 10 rating and please do not be deceived by the plenty of comments stating it's an impeccable new genre classic. There, I said it. However, I do admit that the film is a worthwhile and well-crafted attempt at traditional & spooky horror with beautiful scenery and filming locations, an admirably melancholic ambiance and – most of all – an authentically creepy monster! The Owl Man, which you can admire on the cover artwork, is a nightmarish creature with impressive mask and claws that demands for a specific type of sacrifices. The timid school teacher James Findlay has been plagued by visions of this creature ever since his childhood, but now he can confront his traumas because James' mother died and he inherited the parental "Baldurroc Mansion" in the Scottish Highlands. James believes all his phobias originate from this place and, together with the lovely caretaker Eve, he begins to investigate the hidden secrets of the estate. Okay, so far so good, then why exactly isn't "Lord of Tears" as magnificent as it ought to be? Basically because the actual plot is feather light and ultra-thin and there are only two principal characters (and one reasonably significant supportive character) in the entire movie. Brewster compensates for the lack of variety through (over-)long sequences that stylishly build up tension and atmosphere, but they lead absolutely nowhere. You know what kind of sequences I mean: sudden apparitions of the creature underneath a tree, but it vanishes when the protagonist looks again, abruptly ending dream sequences, the clichéd use of creepy children's drawings, etc etc.. The denouement – as in the revelation of the Findlay family secret – doesn't make any sense and raises more questions than the script can answer. The acting performance of Euan Douglas is quite pitiable and the beautiful Alexandra Hulme doesn't convince either. David Schofield's sinister voice is underused. Lawrie Brewster and Sarah Daly (the writer) definitely show talent and growth potential, but "Lord of Tears" is overall unmemorable and weak. Okay, go ahead, hit the non-useful button if you must