Rise of the Zombies

Was I surprised to see Danny Trejo on a cover of a The Asylum flick. Surely on to pick up I guessed. Wrong. Danny is in it for 30 minutes and he's gone never to see again in this zombie flick.

It starts all pretty well and rather gory for an Asylum flick so I was ready for a hell of a ride, and yes, it was a hell of a ride until the car running away from the zombies crashed on San Fransisco's Lombard Street. Pure CGI and yes, Asylum cheapie. From there on this flick falls down in a lot of blah blah and here and there some zombie attack but from here too the effects of shooting the zombies was done CGI. But it wasn't all that bad, here and there I saw some rather good effects too. But I can't say that this is a must see. It's a mediocre flick for, no pun intended, no brainers. Very simple story and nothing scary or special.

Gore 1,5/5 Nudity 0/5 Effects 2/5 Story 2,5/5 Comedy 0/5

Shocker of shockers, this is a piece of crap. I know this news will startle many of you. How could this possibly go wrong, you say? A cheaply produced zombie flick with bad special effects and a cast of has-beens and never-weres? It has classic written all over it. Yet somehow this master formula fails. It would be easy for me to blame the movie's failure completely on the Hollywood Squares cast led by Mariel Hemingway (who, no joke, I thought was deceased) and the now-elderly and overweight Danny Trejo. But the cast is only a symptom of a much larger disease: namely The Asylum, the absolute worst production company in the industry today. Possibly worst ever. They make all that terrible SyFy channel garbage we all watch and hate. It's become popular in recent years to bestow some "so bad it's good" badge upon these movies. That's unfortunate because it just encourages more subpar waste like this is produced.

This movie sucks. Don't watch it.

How anyone could attempt to put some sort of positive spin on this rotting can of garbage is beyond me. I, like several others, gave it a chance because of several cast members, but even their performances were atrocious. It was painful to see the chief engineer of the Enterprise used in such a meaningless role. Several of these actors are capable of putting in good solid performances, but not in this flick. Wow! What a complete waste of talent. At times I even wondered if this was some sort of attempt to be funny, like Neil Hamburger, but like him it wasn't. This is the sort of film that has you constantly looking over your shoulder because you're horrified someone might actually catch you watching.

The plot isn't anything new. And the execution is pretty typical.

Mariel Hemmingway's acting was outright painful. Flat line delivery, and almost never with the proper emotion. Ethan Suplee isn't much better, but thankfully he doesn't have to say much. Lavar Burton is excellent, think the emotion of I Am Legend, without the kick-ass survivalist skills. By far the most noteworthy part of the movie. Danny Trejo is as Danny Trejo is, bad-ass. You won't be disappointed by him.

The effects are decent and the gore is quality.

If you enjoy watching formulaic zombie action movies with little cinematic value, this will deliver.

When I saw the SyFy logo I must admit that my hopes and excitement went tumbling down fast, but still I wanted to watch this as it is a zombie movie - and I am a sucker for anything zombie. So I mustered up and sat through this movie, which actually turned out to be a rather nice surprise for a SyFy Channel original movie. So don't let the SyFy logo scare you away from watching the movie.

Sure, this movie borrows heavily, and I emphasize heavily, from the hit series from AMC "The Walking Dead", to the point where it almost becomes embarrassing to watch. But still, for a SyFy movie, then they really went all in with the production of this movie and managed to muster something that is rarely seen from their production line.

The zombies actually looked quite good and had interesting make-up, so it was a nice to see that they had spent some money on make-up and special effects.

There is a handful of semi-famous actor and actresses in the movie, but despite this, then the movie, acting-wise, was nothing impressive, and didn't really manage to rise over mediocrity.

I didn't fully understand the concept of why the zombies in this movie felt pain, it just didn't really work well on any account.

However, in overall, then "Rise of the Zombies" is actually a good enough movie to watch for any zombie fans. It is nothing extraordinary or exceptional, but still worth a watch.