Space Sharks

Granted, when I sat down to watch the 2024 movie "Space Sharks" I harbored zero expectations to the movie. Why? Well, first of all, the movie's title was sufficient in itself. And the fact that the only familiar name on the cast list was Eric Roberts just didn't elevate any hopes for the movie. But I am a sucker for shark movies, and of course I would give writer and director Dustin Ferguson's 2024 movie a fair chance on the off-chance that it might actually be a worthwhile movie.

The narrative in the movie is near non-existing. You mostly just watch random people mill about with their daily lives and chores, to the way-too-high sounds of 1980s synth music. Yeah, it wasn't really particularly entertaining to say the least. And the writer copies heavily from the 1987 movie "Predator" as well, to the point where it was embarrassing to witness.

And the dialogue in the movie was terrible. It was as if it was written by either AI or some pre-school student with dreams of being a script writer.

The acting performances in "Space Sharks" was sluggish and laughable. It felt like the majority of the actors and actresses didn't buy into this movie themselves, and they were just there to collect an easy pay cheque. And even Eric Roberts looked and felt like his mind was far away on some remote tropical beach while his body was on the set of "Space Sharks". Aside from Eric Roberts, then I was only familiar with actress Brinke Stevens. Yeah, I've seen enough low budget and dubious movies to recognize her, I admit that.

The movie's dialogue track is very low, and you need to crank up the volume to hear the dialogue properly. But there is a problem, because the movie's annoying 1980s synth score is way higher than the dialogue, so you have two very different scales of volume going on.

I am beyond amazed how a movie that is made in 2024 can have CGI effects that look like something from a game from the early 2000s. The CGI animation scene with the corridors after the intro sequence was just insanely cringeworthy to look at. The graphics were just so horribly outdated.

And you have to suffer through about 39 minutes of the movie before you get to see the God-awful sharks themselves. And 39 minutes was well over half of the movie, as it runs at a staggering 70 minutes of pure pointless boredom.

While the movie is terrible and abysmal, it wasn't even on the scale where it was fun to watch. Nay, "Space Sharks" is just straight up a terrible and ridiculous movie, that is not worth your time, money or effort. Some of us suffered through this dumpster fire of a movie, so you don't have to; you're quite welcome.

My rating of "Space Sharks" lands on an undisputed one out of ten stars.

I dont know why the rating started at 1, there should be Negative as well.

I watched it in 20 min, full of useless seens, no idea what is the idea, one photo for the shark which is a man waring a costume of shark running.... i could make much better with 100 USD budget. Shame and shame and shame again.

Advice, if you are drunk, hase 1 hour extra to waste or simply wana watch why this movie is rated 1 (like me) please watch it, its only 6 or 7 locations shoots, each will be 10 min talking long. Its also rated for PRE-BORN age. Dont you belive me, just wacth it again. The highest prize for moet rubish movie shall be given to this one.

The only conclusion I can draw from this incomprehensible waste of effort is that Eric Roberts owes somebody and is repaying the favor with his participation in this movie. This isn't like one of those Bruce Willis Post Dimentia movies, It is far worse. Although the movie tries to have a plot, the actors and dialog don't even compare to a kindergarten play. Accommodation of the fully drawn special effects on human acting Are a travesty of the film industry. Clearly someone wanted to make a movie with an iphone and just decided one day to rough sketch a story about Mutant sharks in space and fill it with marginal actors and idiotic dialog Imdb needs to provide for a negative scale rating on movies because this would be negative 1 billion. I am thoroughly appalled that this movie, but what really gets me are the Fake ratings.

This movie mis-sold itself.

It is really a nature documentary, showing us some gorgeous slow shots of foliage, with a most 80s sound track, with a bit of humans in it to remind us how superior unmoving, bad lit, badly frames leaves can be in terms of screen time.

When watching, it becomes instantly clear what this movie is. If you make the mistake of hopping through the long shots, slow pans and weirdly framed bits of scraggly bush, then you'll skip the majority of the movie. If, instead, you skip through the truly atrocious human parts, then you can remain in that calem, zen space, especially if you turn off the horrendous synths.

Part of me wonders if the movie has been made to demonstrate to other film makers every bad mistake a director can make. Introducing characters needs to have them engaged with others, interesting dialogue, read with conviction and verisimilitude. Not 5 minute montages of them getting out of bed, scratching their balls and having breakfast.

Shots designed to capture the nature of a person need to be at the level of the faces, with the actor filling the screen, so we can focus on their emotions as they play out across their faces, not shot from above, seeing mostly the tops of their heads.

Chase scenes need more than just a stationary camera and intense music. Indeed, don't build your movie around the tunes, padding out every scene to fill the runtime of the royalty free midi synth track you downloaded.

Your story also needs a story. Hinting at day of the triffids and predator isn't enough. Character development. Engaging mystery. Stakes. Something. Anything.

There were so many flaws with this movie. Its not even bad. It boring. Boring, meaningless waste of everyone's time. The director needs to go to school, learn some new tricks, and maybe watch some good movies and pay attention to the direction. Perhaps then they won't share turgid nonsense with the world, but something worthy of pride, instead.

My wife said "Eric Roberts.must have owed someone a favour."

Julia please give your brudda some $ this is unbearable.

It hurts too watch but it made me laugh and cry. There is no $&@&$$ way my wife and I could make it through the entire film.

I just wanted to see a space shark :(

Looking at wife's face while we watch this was priceless.

She hates me now and wants a divorce.

Yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy Eric Roberts y.