Alien Armageddon

Anyone who says this C rated movie is any good is promoting this movie. Very low budget and digital effects. Poor plot, script. I think I made this movie up in my head when I was 8 but it was better then. Not as smart as a Woody Allen movie but definitely as bad don't waste your money it will probably be on one of those crappy movie t.v. stations in a month.

Well it says I have to write ten lines to submit a review so I could have written the script for this movie on here.

I want my four dollars back for this movie.

Seen this movie in many different versions of the same plot.

Anti-climatic: don't know where this movie peaks.

I used to think that "Tomorrow When The War Began" was the crappiest film ever. But now there is a new contender. In fact it's no contest.

Who the hell... How the hell... What the hell... made this rubbish?

I'm trying to imagine the pitch to investors in this movie and I can only believe it was by the smoothest, slickest conman ever, to the most naive, gullible idiot ever. A match made in hell ... for the rest of us.

I'm speechless while writing. Think of the advert that annoys you most and then make that advert 90 minutes long. Tadah! Here it is!

Must rest now. My brain has been severely damaged. Must press zero ... on the ... rating button... before I pass... out...

(OK - enough ellipses already!)

I didn't go into watching this movie with high expectations .. just hope. And sadly .. my hope was dashed to the ground. At least the boot didn't grind the hope into the ground.

The story line is not bad. Nothing new but a new way of combining various facets of the sci-fi universe the movie has made for our entertainment. (Yes .. boys and girls .. every idea in this movie has been used in print or TV or movies at least 50 years ago.) However .. the acting was leaden .. the special effects I could have done better on my desktop computer (ok .. I admit some of it wasn't bad) .. the dialogue ranged from okay to horrible (mainly just bad).

One good thing .. was the soundtrack and foley effects which weren't bad at all. One other good thing .. was the story progression. (Sorry that some people seemed to get confused over a relatively straight forward denouement of "the secret" behind the invasion.) That .. at least .. was the "something" that actually kept my attention enough to rate this turkey a 4.

Boys and girls .. this story was laid out like a detective story. Clues and information sprinkled along the way leading to the penultimate clarity of understanding. (P.S. That's also why the "troops" wore full head covers and botched up speech .. to keep you from figuring out a major part of "the secret" too soon.)

Never have figured out why shoestring budget sci-fi movies make a hand weapon that looks like it should weigh 50 lbs but is no different than an AK-47. (Suddenly remembers the tiny cricket from MIB and laughs to himself.)

The saddest part of all .. is that sci-fi does incorporate every type of story .. with sci-fi twists. But in the movies .. it seems the only sci-fi you get is the "action packed" drama. (Bug hunts) And that makes this movie a bit on the remarkable side. The detective sci-fi storyline is not commonly used in movies. (YOU are the detective.)

If you enjoy a movie that doesn't need to keep you on the edge of your seat or reaching for your weapon of choice to join the fight .. but instead like to be given things that make you scratch your head and wonder "what does that have to do with anything" .. you might enjoy this. Well .. if you can get past all the other bad parts .. then maybe.

Well, I liked it when the aliens "cancelled" George Noory's show...

NOt much else.

This film was okay in the Special effects department, given a budget of less than six figures.

Of course, there were a few interesting bits, like the women who were turned into "Hens" producing food. But mostly, the movie was incoherent nonsense, with scenes in the prison taking up way too much of its running time. Especially scenes involving body functions.

But most of the ideas were tired and other people did them better. Symbiot worms that took people over? The Trill, the Hidden, the Puppet Masters. Aliens who succumb to a disease? That's original- when H.G Welles did it 100 years ago! So if you don't have original ideas, you should at least have interesting characters.

Characters were introduced and then vanish for no good reason, other than I suspect someone promised them they could be in this movie. Saddest of all was Virginia Hey (The ROad Warrior, Farscape) clearly too old to be doing these kinds of roles anymore.

Final insult- the cover art. Yup, if you compare the cover art for this turkey that Red Box used, you will notice a strange similarity to "Cowboys and Aliens" cover art. Well, I guess someone was fooled somewhere.

For a Sci-Fi movie, then "Alien Armageddon" wasn't particularly impressive. However, I will say that I have seen worse movies than this one.

The story is about a race known as the Nephilim (very original, eh?) who come to Earth and invade the planet to harvest resources from this planet (again, very original). But humanity does not just roll over and surrender, a small group of resistance fighters take up arms to fight back the invading alien force.

Well, the storyline is fairly generic and right off the "let's make a Sci-Fi movie storyboard", as there is nothing new here whatsoever. It is all stuff that has been done countless times in other Sci-Fi movies. So don't get your hopes up.

As for the characters in the movie, well you don't really bother much to form any kind of association or bond with any of them, as they are fairly two-dimensional and lacking characteristics.

Effects-wise, then "Alien Armageddon" wasn't great. Sure, there was an effort put into it and they tried. I will give them as much as saying that the armors of the Nephilim was actually looking good, and the make-up effects on the hybrid (which looked a lot like a zombie) was actually quite cool. But the explosions and destructions of cities and such was lacking proper CGI effects to be believable. And for some reason people's heads kept exploding in a burst of liquid (without any meat or bones) whenever they got hit by the Nephilim weapons, yet, their weapons didn't leave marks on vehicles when they struck them. Odd. Very odd. There were some nice enough effects on some of the creatures, but nothing impressive.

As for the resistance, it was said that they had an army waiting, but you never got to see this army, only a handful of people at the most. So it wasn't really as if you bought into the whole concept and the fact that humanity was actually struggling against a superior race from beyond the stars.

In overall, then "Alien Armageddon" was below average and mediocrity. It was entertaining at times, but at other times it just took forever to get nowhere. So it wasn't an all together enjoyable experience.