Cowboys & Indians

This is the worst, I have seen better by a high school student. Too bad, good actors must start somewhere I guess. Who would write such crappy lines, using toys arrows, wow that was cheap. The trailer is deceiving, or misleading, it made you think it can be a decent movie. I think this movie should be shown to all future film students as an example of what not to do. This should be a fist year student, film critique project, make a list of what was good about the movie and the list would be extremely short. The woman Indian was so bad , I don't even want to give her attention even for being bad. That's how bad she is. I hope most of these people have a regular paying job, because this should not be a career for them . I would not make my worst enemy watch this.

Lighting is bad. In the same scene, some skin tones were washed out while others were almost totally unlit. The sound is bad (speech is similar to 'projecting' high school stage actors before rehearsals are complete)

The amount of stereotyping is shocking; Native American war chants and 'whooping' are only one example. Actors seemed totally unconvincing.

At the date of this review, there were 13 ratings of 10/10 and some reviews were written in decent English but were totally accepting of the nearly unprecedented-for-even-modern-TV flaws (November update, the trend continues: out of 139 ratings there are now 18 ratings of 10/10. Making this more suspicious, there is only 1 rating of 9/10 and another 2 ratings of 8/10. On the 10 point scale, the median rating is a more representative and honest 2/10).

My guess is that the cast, and the directors etc, solicited friends and other friendly people to watch and vote on, and in some cases review, this mess (The November update data above suggest that that guess is still on target).

Captain Bugle entertains people in the old West by boxing. He and his partner Cartwright are con men, and Bugle pretends not to be very good, until the end when it counts.

In a typical Western town, Prescott Seavers and his partner are another pair of con men. They play poker and always seem to end up short when there's a lot of money to be won. So they always conveniently have a valuable mining claim to bet, which the other person wins. The claims are pretty much worthless, since not only do they have a whole stack of them hidden, but the Black Claw live on the land where the claims are and respond violently to anyone who trespasses.

One of those winners is willing to try mining, but he needs a guide. The guide he picks turns out to be a crook, but our hero Bugle shows up just in time, and he takes over.

The Black Claw, including Red Bear (later renamed Bad Face after an incident that makes the other Indians laugh), kidnap Patricia and leave our heroes for dead. Or are they really dead? Can Patricia be rescued without a bloody war that will result in massive destruction and loss of life? The white men have plenty of soldiers and determination, and they don't care how many might die. But there may be a solution ...

I think this was supposed to be a comedy, or even a parody, of Westerns. It's not politically correct, though the Indians do seem to justify their violent behavior. It is, after all, their land, and the Great Spirit is offended by the behavior of the white man.

In order to take this movie seriously, you have to laugh at it. If anyone intended this to be serious, they failed miserably. Even the background music makes it clear we are supposed to laugh.

Alvin Cowan as Bugle shows all the emotion of, say, Jean Claude van Damme. He's also just as heroic. And he does occasionally show some actual talent beyond fighting ability. Amazing fighting ability.

Katy Maloney shows a lot of courage. Patricia is willing to do whatever it takes, even die. And with these people, she just might.

James McCarthy also gives a good performance, or at least he seems talented because of the British accent. He seems out of place in the old West, but quite sophisticated and able to handle himself if needed.

It's different from the average Western. Not the gold standard of "Blazing Saddles", but .... interesting.

"I must taste her blood."- Native American Women, They're not vampires?! I found this movie incredible racist. The movie portrayed the Native Americans as savage monsters who wen't around killing and scalping settlers. Depending on the tribe Native Americans mainly tried to avoid the white settlers who would come on their land to hunt, mine for gold and end up offending the natives. The only reason Natives fought the settlers were to over come the new US government who cheated them out of promised food, land and treatment. To speak of the settlers being innocent and in fact friendly to the natives was an all over lie. They should have done their research before making a movie like this, damn shame. Along with that but the effects were horrible, the lighting was terrible the acting was horrendous, and

the sound wasn't done correctly. It really should just go back on the shelf named "Home-Made Movie"!

With the hundreds and thousands of writers, directors and producers all looking for their break in cinema - THIS gets made?

How?

Why?

Someone, somewhere has too much money, too big an ego and absolutely no idea!