Suicide Girls Must Die!

I did manage to sit through the whole thing. It had sound, moving images, some sort of plot, and characters.

I suppose I'm at the right age and of the right gender to enjoy this sort of thing...young alt women in various states of undress. But it didn't appeal to me at all. For one thing, these young women have particularly unattractive personalities. For another, contrary to what others have written, they're pretty plain-looking and not much of a turn-on, even nude and trying to pose seductively.

I think it really began to irritate me when four girls in a boat, even when equipped with a very nice paddle, couldn't seem to get their boat the last 100 feet to the shore. Nope...got to strip (literally) and swim to shore.

As for the final resolution and climax of the story, if you can't see it coming from a mile away, you don't watch many movies.

Better than "Birdemic," but not by too much. Still, watchable in parts.

A horror movie with women from the Suicide Girls website? Well what could possibly go wrong here? Aside from...

...everything?!

This movie is the epitome of stupidity, bad storyline and horrible acting. It is everything that you don't want a movie to be, and then some. You have to look far and wide to manage to find stuff like this.

But I am sure if you are a teenager and have just recently discovered the thrill of naked ladies, then "Suicide Girls Must Die" is the right movie for you. But for the rest of us, people that have any sense of maturity and who wants just an ounce of quality in what we see on the screen, then "Suicide Girls Must Die" is a total waste of time, film and effort.

The storyline is fairly straight forward, simplistic and rather boring actually. A group of women from the suicide girls dot com website go deep into the forest for a photo shoot for a calender, but they start to mysteriously disappear and the horror begins.

A fairly average storyline that doesn't have anything to offer, unless you count naked and scantily clad women something to offer. These women are plastered with tasteless and tacky tattoos, which may or may not fall into just everyone's taste. Personally I don't mind tattoos, but there is something called moderation and class, and these clearly are well beyond that, in my opinion. And let's not forget that the acting talent combined between the entire cast doesn't even start to match up to even a single of most Hollywood actors and actresses.

The camera work in the movie was nothing to get excited about, quite the opposite actually. It is rare that I get annoyed with camera work in movies that aren't those God awful 'documentary-like' movies and 'lost footage' movies (such as "Blairwitch", "Paranormal Activity", and the like), but the camera work in this movie was just frustrating and annoying to behold.

So what are the good points of this movie? Well if you like naked women plastered with tattoos and super tacky horror movies, then "Suicide Girls Must Die" might just do the trick for you. For me, this movie did absolutely nothing and it was an uphill battle to get through. I actually gave up and had to turn it off, it was just that horrible.

If you enjoy a proper horror movie and want to be thoroughly entertained by the movie you sit down to watch and invest your time and effort into, then "Suicide Girls Must Die" should be avoided at all costs.

Just pathetic. It's about a bunch of very unattractive women getting together in a remote cabin to shoot some nude poses for a calender. One by one they start disappearing without a trace. So what do these women do? They scream and swear at each other and point fingers instead of doing anything logical.

Just abysmal. Disgusting film trying to mix topless females and horror. The main problem is that NONE of these women are even remotely attractive (and most have totally hideous tattoos), are terrible actresses, swear nonstop and are just annoying people all around. The "horror" sequences are nonexistent. The film is shot in a jerky style with quick takes and jumps that ended up giving me a headache. There's also incredibly annoying "music" playing nonstop. We also get a totally pointless hot tub sequence so we can see them all take off their tops and engage in lesbian kisses (btw, this has nothing to do with the rest of the movie). It all leads to a completely predictable ending that was so downright insulting that I hated the movie! Cheap, badly done, horrible acting, unattractive girls...there's nothing here for anybody. Avoid.

The first 50 minutes of the film is girls talking and shouting at each other and montages of girls taking their clothes off, the closest thing to horror is that some girls go missing. Afterwards it descends into the usual group splits up and go missing 1 by 1. The ending is a huge slap in the face that makes you realise you just wasted your time watching it and makes the film pointless.

The "Reality horror" that it markets itself as is basically Jersey Shore in the woods. The "characters" (all the girls play their real life counterpart) are completely unlikable, which takes away what little suspense ever existed. The only reason you might want to watch this is because the girls get naked but considering you can find better stuff on the internet it's not worth wasting your time with this.

With no knowledge of these films or their content, and having little expectations. This film isn't as bad as some have made it out to be, and it turned out to be more entertaining than initially expected.

It's clearly meant to be a found footage type horror mockumentary type film, reminiscing of the Blair Witch Project. The acting at times doesn't feel scripted with a majority of the scenes just consisting of these heavily tattooed women arguing, screaming and bickering back and forth.

Its plot is very simply. About a dozen of these models go into an isolated cabin in the woods to film a calendar photo shoot, then one by one a girl goes missing. We don't exactly see how these girls go missing or who abducts/ kills them which keeps it more suspenseful.

Several highlights include the random appearance of the "caretaker" seemingly popping out of nowhere when the women were around the campfire. Then another scene with the police officer arriving to seemingly help the women find of the women who got "lost" in the woods.

Also near latter part of the film when they were down to 7 women was when things got further interesting with the women forming two groups. We see a major blowup amongst them with four of the women leaving the cabin area with the use of the boat, boating across the large river to eventually get back to the remote area. This wasn't exactly clear.

Unfortunately the very ending reveal was completely disappointing as it took away from what we witnessed. We understand the reasoning but there could have been a better ending.

Clearly this is a film for not everyone as there is an abundance of open nudity (from these photo shoots) and these women for the most part aren't exactly likeable with the constant whining and bickering. The standouts are Amina, Daven and Fractal (who looks similar to Krysten Ritter). Don't expect too much and don't expect a full out horror film.