Pelt

The B-horror movie seems to be going away. Long gone are the days of picking up a couple of "scary" movies from your local video store, buying some beer and inviting friends over to pick the movie apart. Today's B-horror either tries to be B-horror(thus losing the charm) or is so terrible and boring that there is nothing to make fun of. This film is the best laugh I have had in a while. It is just interesting enough to keep you keep watching and although I feel it does make fun of itself purposely on a couple of occasions, it is just serious enough to get the laughs going. For a B-movie to be funny, the golden rule is that the audience feels that the director has a masterpiece on his hands. No spoilers here: but the best laughs come from the bar scene in the beginning of the movie(particularly the "John" character), then later a female who keeps having a pain and describes it in detail, a certain character's sleeping apparel, the best stereotype of a yuppie jock in horror movie history(seriously) and the flying ax. That is just to name a few. Invite friends over, pour some refreshments and enjoy. This is as good as it gets for horror fun at the film's expense.

Does my summary sound familiar? It should, since this is the basis for many horror films we've seen; some of this ilk better than others. I'm happy to report that this is one of the better ones. You'll get lot's of smiles, a few chuckles, and maybe one or two out right laughs. Add to that an utterance or two of "gross", a surprise ending, and you're good to go. Note: Best viewed by leaving your thinking cap at home (as if you didn't know).

Seven young people set out on some quest to a site located in some out-of-the-way place in the wilderness somewhere via a rarely used route (Don't ever do that folks). The seven are: Three cute cockteasers whose only talent, I'm guessing, is skillfully applying make-up and locating items on sale at clothing stores to cocktease in. As for the four young men, I have names for them which should be indicative enough. I call one "Beer" (likes to say the word and never seems completely sober). Another I call "Screwloose". Here's a sampling: In the movie this guy pours beer on the seat of a chair freshly vacated by one of the afore mentioned cuties and laps it up. Then there's "Farts". Need I say more? I don't think so; --but I will. After he does his thing he uses his hands to waft it your way (Just the messenger folks, don't hate me). Then there's, well, "The Black Guy". I call him that because he's the most normal of the guys and so nothing much distinguishes him but that. Although I will say that when you see what this guy sleeps in you may well deduce that he has issues himself, only not as obvious as the others.

Having left their vehicles behind at a certain point in their journey, the young people don back-packs and begin their hike thru the woods. Screwloose finds a "No Trespassing" sign but hides it from the others with the help of The Black Guy. Eventually they set up camp and later one couple get it into their heads to go off into the night somewhere to make out (All I can say here is that in these type of movies it must be nature's way of weeding out the stupid; cruel but effective).

I think of this movie as a comedy-horror since REAL injury and distress is coupled with the silly banter, utterances and antics of the young people. The movie is called Pelt because there is a very sick freak out there with a thing for butchering and human skin. That I liked this movie surprised the hell out of me!! I always have low expectations when going to see these type of films. Possibly you too, I don't know. Anyway I think you'll like it. Nice mix of humor and violence. Love, Boloxxxi.

I expected a lot from this film especially based on real life, but this movie is terrible, horrible acting by some no name generic actors. This was the worst movie I have seen in a long time. Just writing the review makes me waste my time, who hurt the creators of this movie to make such a terrible movie, I just can't believe this, so for this being a waste of my time and seeing this piece of crap go to waste, and not delivering what the trailer promised to deliver you, this movie goes down as one of the worst movies that I have seen, and with some of the worst acting that I have seen, I give " Pelt " a 1 out of 10 Stars.

It's a clichéd one star movie but I'll give it two because of Amber Bollinger. She's hot and runs around in her panties in the woods. Now for the bad. The characters are so annoying you want them all to die. The plot has been done a million times before (see "Wrong Turn" for one example.) My only hope is that the writer and director never make another movie again. In fact, they should be ashamed of themselves for not having an original thought in their collective imaginations. It's rare you get a chance to make a film, so why give the world a boring retread? On the other hand, Amber Bollinger needs to make many more movies. She reminds me of a young Bobbie Phillips. Unfortunately, her character in this film is so annoying that no one other than a few pervy fanboys will remember her.

If you like watching movies with a bunch of other people and mocking and laughing at an atrocious film, then "Pelt" is the movie for you! "Pelt" takes a cliché premise (young good looking people lost in the woods), adds in a list of no-names who ABSOLUTELY CANNOT act, who are forced to read some of the worst dialog ever written, and then films the whole thing on a store-bought camcorder. Actually, I would have guessed they filmed it on an iPhone, except there is some zooming in and out, so they must have actually sprung for a camera...

The actresses are attractive, and I was kind of surprised that there was almost no gratuitous nudity in "Pelt"... In a real movie, the presence or lack of nudity wouldn't affect my score, but in a cheap slasher film, I kind of expected it. The only nudity in the film was one of the chicks after she was dead, which of course is less of a turn-on...

Don't get me wrong, this is a 2/10 movie that you should watch, especially with a group of friends who are ready to poke a little fun and have a good laugh. It was actually one of the better "so bad its good" movies I have watched in some time.

I was extremely surprised when I came to IMDb after watching Pelt to see that its overall rating was an 8.6. Of course, only 19 people had voted to arrive at that score, so obviously, the cast and crew of the film had come here and cast votes. Once that number of reviews increases, the score of this movie will slide down into the 2-4 range it belongs in.