Virus X

It's a cheap Science Fiction movie. That's a good thing on a depressed night, like a half gallon of chocolate ice cream. But this one is so bad it doesn't satisfy. Nor is it so bad that it is a comedy.

It's a gore fest about a designer plague and a bunch of scientists trapped in a small lab area where the infection has broken out. I could go into more details about the ridiculous plot, the bad special effects or the lousy make-up but let's skip to the highlight of the movie, the sex scenes. By the time they finally decide that it's time to go get naked they're all dying from the plague and look really gross. So you don't even get to enjoy some hot boobs.

You don't have to watch it for originality. You have seen it a thousand times, a deadly virus being made by a mad scientist (Joe Zaso) being under control of someone (Sybil Danning) who wants world domination. Here the virus is simple, it's just a deadly influenza, know as H1N1. The scientist working for the dominator got intoxicated by the virus. So it's a fight between life and death. The directing by Ryan Stevens Harris wasn't that bad. And the simple effects used were okay too, just some blood on faces and some sickening vomit, but it surely worked. Even the acting was okay, Joe played his typical role. But of course there is Sybil. She's the main role in it and only appears for a few moments but she's still okay. She's aging but still got the skills. It's just a simple flick that keeps you attracted by the editing, the only problem I got was that at the end, from around 55 minutes, it drops a bit of suspense and even the scene were Sybil got infected is a bit too long. Nice effort.

It's hard to describe this without feeling like I'm providing a spoiler in some way.

Yes, it's a low budget film and most of its weaknesses are connected to the lack of realism that a bigger budget would have brought. At the same time, the director disguises most of those problems and they don't distract from the story.

If you've ever seen the TV series Testees, this is something like that turned into a horror film. There's sort of a zombie tease going on with it too. Killing Room also comes to mind.

In short, doctors, labs, experiments, test subjects, secrets, blood, biting, infection, chemical weapons, funding from the rich and psychotic.

Hi, how are ya? How did you spend your evening last night? Did you watch the Oscars? I didn't. I spent my time watching a sh!%%y movie called "Virus X", released by Lionsgate. Maybe I should have stuck with what George C. Scott once called "a meat parade."

Danita Herrington (Sybil Danning) wants a virus, and she wants it now! Why? For world domination of course! I wish I was making that last part up, but I digress. Anyways, Dr. Graveman (indie horror vet and Timo Rose regular Joe Zaso) has it made-an advanced stain of the H1N1 virus that kills in 3 days. Well, it ends up infecting a group of medical scientists, so they need to be quarantined and all that jazz. Can they survive? Why does Jarren (Domiziano Arcangeli) have such laughable hair? Will you be able to stay awake?

While I'll give it minor points for the cinematography, color tones, nasty gore effects and the ambient score by Shawn K. Clement, "Virus X" is just a bore to sit through. The acting ranges from non-existent (Arcangeli) to over-done (everyone else.) In fact, so many of the performances feature actors overacting as if they have guns to their heads that it almost becomes unintentionally amusing in that aspect. There's also no real reason given to care at all about the medical scientists, as we aren't given any real back story about them, and so many of them are such bad actors. The movie also has an intriguing element to the plot-well, everything except Jarron and Herrington-what with the viral fears that seem to pop up every few years, but the movie is unable to do anything with them. It just ends up feeling like a rough draft than an actual movie.

There's no reason to see "Virus X", except for the interviews that serve as a special feature. They are all done for a show called "Eye on Entertainment", hosted by a bubble headed blond named Dawna Lee Heising, that feels more like a parody than it does the real thing. I even looked it up after watching said interviews to see if it was real, and sure enough, it is.

So yeah, I've seen worse this year (hello "Season of the Witch"), but that's no real excuse. By the time the whole thing is said and done, the only thing you'll catch from "Virus X" is boredom. Next time, I'm sitting with the cool kids and catching the Oscars or something. It can't be as bad as this.

What a thriller! I have a particular enjoyment for B horror films and this one was a real treat. The whole film keeps me on the edge of my seat. The acting was nice all around and there were a few performances that shined through for me. Particularly the British actor and the guy who played the robot. The only problem I would say is that it was a little difficult to tell he was a robot. The cinematography did a stand up job along with the production team of capturing the right atmosphere. The art direction and production design were really spot on for this film. I can't wait to see more from this director! A great sci fi movie with a dark atmosphere.