River of Darkness

WOW!!!! This is one word I can use as being tremendously awful. Where does someone begin with a film like this. Storyline was absolutely uneventful, characters were nothing short of uncompelling, cinematography was lacking throughout and the editing was sub-par at best.

Why do wrestlers insist on going into acting, Kurt Angles performance was sour and collectively did not fit the character.

The combination of slasher/paranormal/undead pairing was an utter "bomb".

Terrible, clueless, dreadful are words to describe the acting throughout the film. In fact this is pure garbage and in this film collector's eyes should have never been made. The audience as well as actors and people who worked on this film should all be given refunds for how terrible it is. It is 1hr 30 minutes of your life you'd like a refund on.

oh..come on! seriously??? worst film ever... oh my god...i just cannot believe it! everything about the movie was terrible.

At one point, I actually thought that it was a horror/comedy. But turns out that it's not.

you've gotta be kidding me to actually call this a movie and release it. seriously. I would not even want to get paid to watch this movie another time. horrendous.

Didn't the maker of this movie even watch this once, before he actually went on to release it? oh my god...seriously, this has got to be a joke or something.

I love movies of all genres, of any age, regardless of how good or bad they are. But River of Darkness doesn't deliver on any level. So far there have been some gems such as Rango, some mediocre efforts like Sanctum and some poorly conceived movies such as Battle:Los Angeles and Justin Bieber:Never Say Never. But River of Darkness is the only movie so far this year that I downright despise, it is that bad!

River of Darkness is a good example of a movie that is all style, no substance. Saying that does nothing in the film's favour, because production-values wise this film is shoddy. The scenery and sets have an appropriately Gothic look to them, but they are completely ruined by the cinematography and editing which makes the movie look as though it has been edited on a bacon slicer and the lighting which is incredibly dull.

River of Darkness fails epically in the story and writing as well. The story did have a nice arc to it on paper, but the execution was so derivative and poor one couldn't help thinking River of Darkness offers nothing new to the genre. Not one scene is believable in any way, the murders are all gore no heart no matter how marginally impressive the gore is. But that is nothing compared to the dialogue, I have heard some bad dialogue in many movies but River of Dakrness has some of the worst dialogue I have ever heard in my entire life. It is so cheesy and forced, and so clichéd and melodramatic I could not take it seriously at all.

The film's direction is incompetent. In fact the direction is so sloppy that the film could have easily had no direction whatsoever. The characters I felt nothing for whatsoever, they are written terribly and you learn next to nothing about them. The pace is languid so much so nothing comes to life. None of the actors are genuine or brings heart to their characters either.

Overall, a shoddy mess and to be avoided. 0/10 Bethany Cox

...the reason being that it was made at all. If your a wrestling fan looking for the novelty of seeing Kurt Angle, Sid Vicious and Kevin Nash outside of the ring then please realise....its not worth it. Nash and Sid are unrecognisable and rarely out of the darkness and Kurts acting is so appalling you will turn away and cringe so you wont see him much either.

In fact if you doubt that fact check out the other movies starring Kurt. He's an unbelievable athelete and in my opinion the greatest all rounder in the history of wrestling but outside the the ring he falls apart and cannot be taken seriously.

The acting is beyond awful, the special effects are preschool and the storyline is recycled. There is nothing good to say about this film and I hope all involved are ashamed of themselves.

before me, there where 5 users who voted this an average of 7.5/10?!? What is the world coming to if anybody actually thought that this movie was watching? Were the crew voting for themselves perhaps? this movie was such a waste of time and in the end I couldn't even make it to the finish before turning it off. Kurt Angle obviously has serious skill as a wrestler but as an actor he is seriously lacking. unfortunately, he was not even the worse thing about this *cough* "film" *cough* the script/dialog is just pitiful. There is one line from an actor where she says that the bad guys eyes were RED, yet when they show close-ups of Kevin Nash's character his eyes are yellow/orange... the story, pathetic. The casting is a joke - i've seen better acting with more personality from a 1st grade school play. Kurt Angle as the lead was stiffer then a plank of wood yet when he is doing his wrestling promos, he comes across with so much passion and personality. Then the 'special effects' / makeup department... oh my god... in todays age this should just not be allowed. Anybody involved in this abysmal attempt at cinema should be embarrassed enough to crawl under a rock and never come out again. I cannot remember attempting to watch any other film which was this bad, especially considering this site shows they had a budget of $3.26 million, where you look at a movie like Paranormal Activity made in 2007 for an estimated $15K that turned out to be a fantastic movie. Please I implore anybody, do not waste time on this garbage