Spider from the Attic

I stumbled upon the 2021 horror movie titled "Spider in the Attic" from writers Scott Jeffrey and Rhys Waterfield by sheer random chance. And I must admit that the movie's cover/poster actually seemed interesting and the movie's synopsis also sounded interesting. And being an avid horror fan and liking things with monstrously big spiders, of course I had to watch "Spider in the Attic".

Needless to say that I wasn't really harboring much of any hopes or expectations for "Spider in the Attic", given the fact that the majority of creature features out there with large spiders tend to be dubious movies at best. But still, I opted to watch this 2021 movie from director Scott Jeffrey.

First, I have to say that that the movie's cover is false advertisement, as the spiders in the movie look nothing like what is depicted here. So that was a massive disappointment. And truth be told, then the movie's cover/poster was sadly the best part about this entire movie.

The storyline told in "Spider in the Attic" was simplistic, but it was adequate in its own rights. So you are not in for a grand horror cinema experience from writers Scott Jeffrey and Rhys Waterfield. However, the characters were bland and the written dialogue was questionable.

"Spider in the Attic" has spiders, well spider-like creatures. First, as I mentioned above, they look nothing like what is shown on the cover. And the spiders in the movie were CGI animated, of course, but poorly CGI animated, I might have to add. The spider design looks extraterrestrial in appearance, which was what the storyline also hinted at, but you can't put one type of arachnid on the cover and present something else to the audience entirely.

The movie had a cast ensemble of actresses and actors all unknown to me. And that is usually something I enjoy in movies, but the performances of the ones in "Spider in the Attic" were just bland and lacking drive and energy. But of course, with the subpar script, lousy characters and dialogue, of course the actresses and actors had little to work with.

Director Scott Jeffrey delivered a disappointing movie with "Spider in the Attic", no doubt about that. And this is not a creature feature that I would recommend you waste your time, money or effort on. Especially since the movie's cover/poster was the best thing about the ordeal, and that spider is not even in the movie.

My rating of "Spider in the Attic" lands on a three out of ten stars.

Horrible cgi, horrible acting, horrible everything.

Don't do it, avoid at all costs.

Go for a walk, resort your underwear drawer, just do anything but watch this horrible, awful and incredibly boring film.

You know a movie like this is gonna fail when the FX are terrible.

Even all those hot girls could not save this awful movie sadly bad at everything acting script story etc.

I only write reviews when absolutely compelled. My sorrow goes out to the actors because they all showed potential and were likeable/dis-likeable based on their roles. I would have given them more points but someone needed to smack the directors and scream "Seriously, Come on, please let me act, give me a real line." Unfortunately, they were directed to say the dumbest/worst lines possible throughout the movie and were not allowed to act out the scenes with any realism. Example: Lots of men and women lose their minds/wits when they see just one tiny spider. Here are half a dozen women who barely react when they see creatures which resemble giant spiders with tails and teeth. If you decide to watch, it will be painful as you will see the actors make the exact opposite decision even the most idiotic person would have handled better in every possible scenario. We are all used to seeing the one or two actors in the script required to die for a good scare or because they are the villains; however, when all of the actors repeatedly make dumb decisions, over and over, from beginning to end, it makes you realize it's not the actors fault. There was one rediculous sequencing error where one of the lead actors saw a spider the size of a 40lb dog and then never mentioned to the other actors, instead she went on as if the only spider in the house was the one in a glass aquarium which was 25% the size. One of the worst directed movies I've seen, lots of wasted potential even with the limited CGI.

"Spider In The Attic" is the sort of film that makes you think, "Wow, this could've been so good." The premise? A scientist gene-splicing killer spiders at home - the kind of mad scientist scenario that screams late-night B-movie goodness. But somewhere along the way, the execution gets tangled in its own web. The story? A meandering mess of pseudo-science and missed potential, where the only thing scarier than the spiders is the lack of coherent plot. It's a slow, painful crawl through a quagmire of lazy writing, with characters that are as engaging as a bag of flour.

The director, bless him, tries valiantly to infuse some atmosphere, with shadowy scenes and an occasional CGI spider that looks decent but could've used a little more menace. Unfortunately, the sound design is so over-the-top that when one spider scuttles up a wall, you'd swear a herd of elephants was on the loose. There's no tension to be found, only a sense of utter tedium that even a toxic spider bite couldn't cure.

Performances are fine - familiar faces from the B-movie circuit, doing their best with what they've got. But no amount of solid acting could save this sluggish, arachnid-infested snooze fest. Skip it and go watch Arachnophobia again.